Tales of Toddlerhood
by Madam RedRose25
Summary: Read scenes that took place when Stan, Kyle, Cartman, Kenny, and Butters were ages four, five and six. Cuteness and chaos are sure to arise! Accepting any ideas you may have for this.
1. Cartman's Hat

A/N: Since I cannot think of a chapter story of the boys as toddlers right now, I decided to write several scenes of their lives ages four-six instead. Enjoy!

**TALES OF TODDLERHOOD **

CARTMAN'S HAT

It had only been two weeks since Stan Marsh and Kyle Broflovski allowed Eric Cartman to be their friend but already they were getting tired of him. Their other new friend Kenny McCormick was fine but Eric, or as they had dubbed him, 'Cartman', was something else. Even though they played together during preschool and Stan had invited him over his house last Saturday, he was still the same boy he was when preschool started. He was still a bullying, fat, mean little boy who liked to make fun of others and steal their toys. Kyle kept telling Stan they should just break off their friendship but Stan didn't have the heart to do so. So while the two played at Stan's after school Thursday, they tried to come up with something to make Cartman stay or go for good.

"I say we still give him a chance," Stan said softly as he held onto his beloved stuffed dog Ruffy.

"We keep givin' him chances Stan! He still is the same," Kyle said grumpily.

Stan put a finger in his mouth, as he usually did when nervous or in thought. "I know," he finally said. "How 'bout we give him one last shot. How 'bout we tells him he has to do something to be in our club."

Kyle looked at him wearily. "Like…?"

Stan shrugged. "I dunno, somethin' to prove he's for reals. He really wantsta be friends wif us."

"I'm listening," Kyle said, crossing his arms.

"Um…" Stan put a finger between his teeth again. "How 'bout, he hasta not say one mean thing to us all day."

Kyle didn't look too impressed. "It has to be somethin' more, Stan. That won't prove nothin'."

"How- how 'bout he hasta do what we say and play how we want. He can't take nothing away from us and we're in charge of what we do."

Kyle thought. "Okay."

Stan smiled; he knew he'd get there in the end. So the next day the two boys waited near the front of the door to their classroom after their mothers had dropped them off, waiting for Cartman to show up. He did, kissing his mother sweetly good-bye before turning to his 'friends.'

"Hey stupid-heads," he greeted.

Stan and Kyle shared a look.

"Kyle an' I think you're real mean to us Cartman, so we're gonna do somefing about it," Stan began.

Cartman sniggered. "Babies."

"We dedided that you can't push us around when we play today. If you do, you're no longer our friend," Stan said, arms crossed in a final sort of way.

Kyle however didn't like this, he had a feeling Cartman wouldn't listen. So he pulled Stan aside.

"I don't think we should do that Stan, he won't do it."

"Then what?"

Kyle watched as Stan took off his large hat to chew nervously on the brim. A smile spread on Kyle's face as he looked at the poof-ball hat then thought about his own. "I know."

He walked back to Cartman. "If you wanna be in our club, you have to get a hat, just like ours."

Cartman was taken aback. "What? That's stupid."

"No it's not. We all have hats. Kenny wears a hood all the time so it counts too," Kyle pointed out to Kenny who had just walked in.

Cartman looked at Kyle with his stupid green hat, Stan with his too-big blue and red hat, and Kenny with his orange hood pulled over his head. He suddenly felt left out and he never liked to be excluded from anything. He humfed.

"Fine, I _will_ get a hat."

"And it hasta be by Monday," Stan informed him.

"I _will_. My mom gets me anything."

"Alright then. 'Member, it can't look like ours either," Kyle said.

"Do you really think he's gonna get one?" Stan asked his best friend.

"Pfff, no, you know him Stanley, he likes to lie."

So when Cartman's mother Liane picked him up from preschool that day he immediately told her everything.

"I need to get a hat Mom other-ise Stan and Kyle won't let me play with them," Cartman whined.

"But you don't need a hat poopsikins," Liane told him.

"But Mooooom, I need one," he whined some more.

Liane thought for a second. "Well, alright then."

"Yes! And it has to be before Monday," he demanded.

"Of course dear."

So all weekend Cartman was taken to the mall to find the perfect winter's hat otherwise he wouldn't have any friends. Not like he needed them, they were both so stupid. Kyle, thinking he was smarter than everyone else and liking all the fruit and veggies snacks they had, thinking he was _so_ healthy, and Stan, with his stupid doggie, walking around with a finger in his mouth all the time, following Kyle around like a lost baby. And Kenny… he never said much and he was poor, which meant he was stupid too. But he hated them so much; he had to be in their club otherwise it wouldn't be as fun to make fun of them. So he _had_ to find a hat. Cartman made his mother walk into all kinds of shops in the mall until finally he found one- the perfect hat in KidZone Clothes.

Monday had Cartman walking into preschool proudly showing off his new hat. Even if stupid Stan and Kyle wouldn't let him be friends he was still keeping it, he liked how he looked in it. He found the two boys and Kenny playing with some cars and trucks.

"So what do you dummies think of my cool new hat?" he bragged.

They blinked and looked at him.

"That's a stupid hat," Kyle stated.

"Yeah, it looks too much like mine," Stan said, gripping his.

"It does not!"

"Yeah-_huh_."

"Yours can't even fit your head Stan. Mine fits my head so it's not the same," Cartman crossed his arms firmly.

Stan turned to Kyle. "So what do we do?"

"He's not gonna change Stan, he's still gonna be the same."

"I know but, he might. People change…"

"They do not!" Kyle pushed him.

"They do too!" Stan pushed him back before looking at Cartman again. "Alright fine, you can be our friend."

"Stan!" Kyle cried.

"But you gotta play wif us and act like us. We're not givin' you no more chances," Stan told him.

Cartman smiled smugly before taking the car that was in Stan's hands and sitting down, ignoring his crying to give it back. He was in; Stan, Kyle, and Kenny were his personal idiots to make fun of. And since they were friends, they would never do anything about it.

_Boy, making friends sure is easy, all I had to do was get a hat_, Cartman thought as he once again took hold of Stan's stuffed dog and began to dictate.

_I hope you liked the first installment of the boys as toddlers. More short stories are to come so stay tuned! _

_Magical love: Rose, June 11, 2010_


	2. In Sickness and Health

**IN SICKNESS AND HEALTH**

Late November had young Kyle walk happily into preschool. It had been almost three months in school and so far, he loved it. He loved answering all of Miss Claridge's questions and being the only one who knew the entire alphabet and how to count all the way to 100 was pretty cool too. But as much as he loved the learning aspects of it, none of it would be enjoyable without his best buddy Stan. He looked forward to playing with Stan every day, so as soon as he walked into the classroom he waited by the fun plastic slide for him to show up. It was where they usually met when Stan's mother dropped him off. But he didn't show. He frowned as he waited. He knew Stan was always one of the last kids to show up because his mom had to get both Stan and his older sister ready at the same time, but he was never late. Finally Miss Claridge had to call him over.

"Come on Kyle dear, we're about to start the morning circle," she told him.

Kyle looked over to see the other children sitting in a circle, ready to tell everyone their highlight of the day before.

"But Miss Claridge, Stan hasn't show up yet," Kyle told her.

"Oh, well you can't just stand around here waiting for him. Come on, sit down."

Kyle had no choice but to do so. The hours passed and Stan had not shown up at all. Kyle did not like hanging around with Cartman all day, that was for sure. And Kenny was talking about things he knew he shouldn't know about and Kyle felt guilty for hearing them. When Sheila picked him up from school he was pretty down.

"How was school bubbe?" she asked.

"Not good. Stan didn't show up today."

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that."

"I hope he does tomorrow, he's my buddy."

"Don't worry Kyle; I'm sure that he will."

But he didn't. Another day passed and Kyle did not see any sign of the boy in the red poof ball hat. He told his mom immediately after she picked him up.

"Well I'm sure little Stanley's just sick or something Kyle, you don't need to worry."

Kyle's head suddenly shot up. "Mom, hey Mom, can we go see him?"

"What?"

"See Stan?"

"Today?"

"Yeah. Now."

Sheila looked shocked. "You don't need to see him now bubbe, it's lunch time."

"Please? If Stan is sick, I'm sure he'd like the company."

Kyle and his big words. His green eyes sparkled; the look on his face made her sigh. She started the car. "All right, we'll go see him. But if he's not up to visitors then we have to go home, understood?"

Kyle nodded, smiling. "Wait! 'Fore we go; I wanna get something from home."

"Kyle"-

"It'll make him feel better if he's sick. Please Mom?"

"Okay, okay, but be quick."

Kyle ran into his bedroom as soon as they went home. He came out and back in the car two minutes later holding something. With that, Sheila made the five minute drive to the Marsh house. Sheila knocked on the front door while Kyle waited in the car. If Stan was home and wanted to see him Sheila would come get him.

"Oh, hello Sheila," Sharon answered, a look of surprise on her face.

"Hello Sharon. This might sound a little sudden but Kyle wanted to know how Stanley was doing since he hasn't been to school in two days."

Sharon still looked shocked. "Oh, he's been sick."

"The poor dear, I thought so. It being November, guess it's that time of year."

"I know. He's been coughing non-stop," Sharon sighed.

Sheila turned around to see Kyle's hopeful face in the car window. "Kyle- was wondering if he could see your son, if he's up to it."

"Oh, I'm sure that would make Stan very happy," Sharon smiled.

Kyle happily walked into the house when his mother let him in.

"I must say I'm surprised. The boys are only four and Kyle already cares that much about him?" Sharon asked Sheila, closing the front door.

"I was thinking the same thing. I didn't think kids this age had much compassion for others."

Sharon opened her son's bedroom door. "Stanley sweetie? Kyle wanted to see how you were doing."

Kyle peaked into Stan's bedroom. "Stan? Stanley?" he called, stepping in.

Stan blinked heavy eyes at Kyle. He rubbed them then looked again. "Kyle?"

"Hi Stan!" Kyle cried happily.

"Kyle, what are you doin' here?"

"I wanted to see you. You haven't been in school for two days. I was worried," Kyle told him.

Stan frowned. "What's 'worried'?"

"It means you're scared of somethin'," Kyle laughed.

"You were scared of me?"

"Well yeah. You've only missed one day of school so far. But- but you missed two days, um, today and- and the day before," Kyle thought hard.

Stan coughed and sniffed. Kyle stood by his bed.

"How you feeling?"

"Bad."

"That sucks dude."

"Yeah. I can't stop cough- coughing," he broke into a coughing fit.

"You gotta get better soon Stan, it's no fun with Cartman around."

"Sorry."

"He was real mean today. He broke my new crayons on purpose," Kyle crossed his arms angrily.

Stan sniffed and leaned tiredly into the pillows on his racecar bed.

"Hey Stan, you'll never guess what Kenny said today."

"What?"

Kyle looked to make sure their mothers weren't around before saying softly, "He said Cartman was a stupid fatass again, and he thinks Susie has a nice vagina."

Stan looked confused. He coughed a bit before saying, "What's a vinja?"

"I don't know. Not even Susie knew so it had to be something bad. The teacher gave him a look, but didn't say nothing. I think she didn't know if he said it or not."

"Well, if a (_cough_) vanja is nice then it can't be that bad," Stan said simply.

"I was thinking the same thing. All I know is he was lookin' down below," Kyle patted below his stomach.

Stan looked down his chest too. "Do you think I have a nice vanja?"

"I think so. Like you said, if it's 'nice' then you must have a nice one, 'cause you're my best friend!" Kyle claimed happily.

"I think so too!"

Minutes later their mothers came up.

"I just put lunch on Stanley, you have to eat something today," Sharon told her son.

"Yes, come along Kyle. I don't want you to get sick either," Sheila said.

Kyle frowned but did a double-take and held out something to Stan. "Here Stan, this is Blue," he said as he showed him a blue stuffed bear. "Once, when I was sick, my mom gave me Blue to make me feel better. I always sleep with him now whenever I feel sick. So now, you can sleep with him 'till you feel better too."

Stan looked at the teddy bear and held it close. "Thanks (_cough_) Kyle."

"Are you sure you want to let Stanley have your bear for now?" Sheila asked the red-head.

Kyle nodded. "Yeah, I'm not sick. Bye Stan!"

Stan waved good-bye to his best friend before his mother took him downstairs to try and eat some soup. Unfortunately for Kyle he did not see Stan in school for the next two days again. He begged his mother to call Stan's so he knew what was wrong. After Sheila had called Sharon she told Kyle that Stan was still sick.

"Can we go see him again?" Kyle asked.

"I'm sorry bubbe but Stan's mother said he's too sick for visitors."

Kyle frowned. "Poor Stan. I wish I could help."

"You did help bubbeleh; you gave him your bear for now. I'm sure he's very happy that you did."

Kyle sighed. "I hope so. Blue always makes me feel better."

Blue was indeed making Stan slightly happy even though his body felt worse and worse each day. The night of the fourth day had him coughing his lungs out and squeezing the teddy bear to him as he lay in bed. Sharon walked into his bedroom as he went into yet another coughing fit.

"Mommy…" Stan whined, tears coming down his face.

"Still not getting better?" Randy asked, stepping in.

"He's only getting worse Randy. I'm really concerned, he sounds terrible," Sharon told her husband as she held onto Stan.

"He'll be better soon Sharon. He's always fine after he gets sick."

"That's the problem, he gets sick so often, especially at the end of the year."

"Lots of kids get sick at this time," Randy said fairly.

Sharon glared at him. "I still say it's more than that. This has been going on for two years now. It's time we get _real_ answers."

Randy looked at his son who was gripping onto Sharon's shirt and the stuffed blue bear. He didn't know what to say or do so he bade him good-night, telling Sharon he'd wait for her in bed. Sharon never did go to bed; she uncomfortably laid her body on the four-year-old's racecar bed and slept with him, when he _could_ sleep. But she awoke around midnight when Stan complained that he couldn't breathe. She watched as his stomach pulled in painfully and he wheezed. She had had it; she woke Randy up and told him.

"We are taking him to the ER right now and I swear, this time we _will_ have answers. I don't care how long it takes," Sharon said fiercely as she put on her shoes and a coat before picking up Stan and wrapping him in a blanket.

All of November 29th had the Marshes waiting for hours at Hell's Pass Hospital, waiting for news on Stan. Only after hours of testing did Dr. Doctor finally come up with a proper diagnoses- Stan had moderate asthma.

"I really don't know how I missed that all these years," he had told a bewildered Sharon and Randy. "Does anyone in your family have asthma?"

"No," they said together. Sharon really wanted to hurt the man right there. It was something that could have been diagnosed two _years_ ago. But all was fine in the end. Stan was hospitalized for a few days before being sent home with too many instructions and medicine than he cared to remember. But at least he was feeling better. And he could go back to preschool! Although he only cared about playing with his friends.

Back at the Broflovski household Kyle was growing more and more worried for his best friend. It had now been days since he heard from Stan, or to say, his mom heard from Stan's mom. He hoped he was okay and he didn't die or something. He bugged his mother one last time to call Mrs. Marsh. He waited in the living room until his mother came in with news (hopefully).

"Good news Kyle, you can go visit Stan," Sheila smiled at the four-year-old.

"I can?"

"Yes. He has been very sick all last week; they had to take him to the hospital."

Kyle frowned. "Oh no. that's not good."

"I know. Apparently, Stan's been diagnosed with a very serious condition called 'asthma."

Kyle had no idea what that was, he just knew the word 'diagnose' wasn't a very pleasant one. "Is he gonna die?"

"No, he'll be able to live a normal life, just like you. Look, I'm sure his mother will tell you more about it when we come over."

"Mom, can we stop at the store and get him something?"

"What?"

"Get him something? Please? If- if he's just been to the hospital, and just been dia-dia-nosed with something, I'm sure he wants a new toy or candy or somethin'," Kyle said matter-of-factly.

"But you already gave him your bear bubbeleh."

"That was just to make him feel better. Please? Just somethin' small?"

Sheila looked surprised, as Sharon mentioned, she had no idea the boys cared that much for each other so soon. They only met a few months ago, they were only four. And they were boys; girls were dubbed the 'compassionate' ones. But the thought of the boys already being so close made her take Kyle to the store and buy Stan something small. Kyle couldn't wait to see Stan's face when he gave him his gift.

"Hello Sheila, Kyle," Sharon smiled when they came by.

"Hello Sharon."

"Stan will be so happy to see you Kyle. Stanley? Kyle and his mother are here!" Sharon called over her shoulder.

Kyle walked into the house and saw Stan sitting on the sofa watching cartoons. He looked a lot better than he did last week.

"Stan!"

"Kyle!" Stan hopped off the couch and did something he hadn't before and hugged him.

"Oh, would you look at that," Sharon crooned to Sheila.

"They really are 'best buddies' aren't they?" Sheila smiled.

"Here, I got you a present," Kyle handed it over.

"Wow, thanks!" Stan took hold of the new pack of crayons and coloring book.

"It's Garfield," Kyle pointed out. "I know that you have a Garfield doll so I thought you would want this."

Kyle suddenly looked hesitant. He looked up at Sharon. "I'm not gonna get sick from him am I?"

Sharon chuckled. "No, asthma isn't contagious Kyle. It's not like the cold."

"Oh, okay," he said brightly. "So what exac-tally is asthma?" he asked Stan.

Stan frowned. "I'm not really sure. All I knows is I can't breaf good so I gotta take medicine wif a special machine."

"A _machine_?" Kyle's eyes lit up. The word machine was one of many favorites for a boy.

"Yeah, come 'ere!" Stan led him to his bedroom and showed him what looked like a gray box with tubing and a funny-looking mask.

"When you said 'machine', I thought it was gonna be biggerer," Kyle noted.

"Well, it still is one. Look- the mask is a dinosaur"- Stan showed him what looked to be a purple dinosaur shaped mask.

"That's the funniest looking thing I ever saw," Kyle pointed out.

"It's not the only thing that's funny. The medicine is the funniest thing I ever tooken," Stan said. "It's not like yucky goopy cough medicine. This stuff comes out like a spray or somethin'."

"A spray?"

"Yeah. Watch"- Stan flipped a switch on the side and mist began to pour out the mask.

"It's loud like a machine," Kyle said over the noise.

Sharon came into the room a minute later and gasped. "Stanley, no, you can't waste any of the medicine okay?"

"I was just showin' Kyle."

"Still, I don't want you to waste any of this alright? I'll keep it in my room until you need it."

"Awww," the boys whined.

"I wanna play with it," Kyle exclaimed.

"This is not a toy, boys. It's a special device that turns medicine into mist." Sharon took the nebulizer away.

"Don't worry Kyle, I'll try to get it next time you're over," Stan said.

"Good, it looks real fun."

Stan suddenly looked shyly at Kyle. "Thanks again for the coloring book."

"You're my best friend Stan. Hey, did Blue cheer you up?"

Stan grabbed hold of the blue teddy bear from his bed. "Yeah, I held him to me the whole time I was at the hospidal." He reluctantly handed it back to its original owner.

Kyle could see that Stan was sad to let it go. He thought of something. "I have an idea dude. How 'bout whenever one of us is sick, we get to keep Blue."

"Really?"

Kyle nodded. "If he both makes us better, it's only fair."

"Thanks Kyle! But what if we're both sick at the same time?"

Kyle thought. "Well, we're just gonna have to have a contest to see who gets him whenever that happens."

Stan nodded.

"You're going to school tomorrow right?"

Stan nodded again. "I think so."

"Good, I can only take so much of Cartman b'fore my brain explodes," Kyle rolled his eyes causing Stan to giggle.

All too soon the visit had to end. Stan was sad to see Kyle go but he knew he'd see him again tomorrow at preschool. In the mean time, he spent the rest of the day coloring in his new Garfield coloring book, enjoying what was the first of what would soon be many strong bonding moments between his very best friend.

_I know, I know, another mention of Stan having asthma. But I felt this would be a cute first way to show the strong friendship him and Kyle share. I hope you liked it. Don't forget, if you have any ideas you'd like to see written, drop me a line and I will see if I can write them. Please review!_

_Magical love: Rose, June 17, 2010_


	3. A First or Second Sleepover

**A FIRST- OR SECOND SLEEPOVER**

Spring of 2006 had four-year-old Stan and Kyle playing on the floor of the Broflovski house, as any usual day. The boys happily made a giant wall out of blocks, only to have it crash down when they drove their stuffed animals into it. When she heard the crash, Sheila hurried out into the living room.

"Boys, how many times do I have to tell you not to make a huge mess in here?" she asked.

"It's not that bigga mess," Kyle insisted.

"It is so. Look, you left out all your watercolor supplies out. You could knock down the cups and spill and stain the carpet!"

"We was going to get back to it," Stan told her.

"You know the rules boys; you can't start a new game until you finished cleaning up the last one."

"But Ma," Kyle whined.

"Clean up now."

"We get to make more of a mess at Stan's house," Kyle crossed his arms.

Sheila glared at her son. "This is not Stan's house. Clean up right now."

Regretfully the boys began to clean before it was nap time. The one plus side for Stan was that nap time at Kyle's was a lot better than home. At home his mean sister Shelley would always disturb his sleep some way or another. Here was much more peaceful to sleep. Kyle had out-grown naps though but still stayed in his bedroom on the floor with a pillow and blanket for 'quiet' time. It was when he usually caught up on reading practice. Kyle flipped the pages of Go Dog Go! idly as Stan tossed and turned next to him.

"Psst- you tired Stan?"

Stan sighed. "Not really."

"Well you gotta try and sleep or else both our moms will be mad."

"We aren't even stuppose to be talking to each other during quiet time, 'member?"

They giggled.

"Man, I wish your mom wasn't going to pick you up soon," Kyle tossed his book aside.

"I know, we never get to play all day. Not at preschool, not at my house, not here."

Kyle crossed his arms. "Big kids get to play longer, all day long. They get to play more games and play with more toys and everything. It's not fair."

"I know. I always hafta go to bed before my sister, stop playing bafore my sister…it sucks," Stan huffed.

"Wish we had a whole day to play."

Stan frowned as he put his arms behind his head. He then sat up. "Hey! I've gots an idea Kyle!"

"What?"

"What if we have a _sleepover_?"

Kyle looked at him funny. "What's that?"

Stan felt a rush of pride, knowing something Kyle didn't for once. "It's when you go over to anofer person's house and sleep there. You get to play all night long and have snacks and soda and everything!"

"Really?" Kyle's eyes were large now.

Stan nodded. "Shelley had one a while ago. It was real fun. Well, for her, not me. She and her friend kept pickin' on me all night long. But my mommy made special treats she doesn't normally make and there was pizza and movies and everything."

"Wow, this sleepover thing sounds fun!" Kyle clapped his hands.

"Let's ask our moms if we can have one."

Kyle nodded. "Yeah. I want to eat pizza and popcorn and watch movies all night too! Wait, whose house do we sleep at?"

Stan put a finger in his mouth for thought. "Uuhh…I dunno."

"We can think on that later." They heard the floor outside the door creak so they 'shhhhed' and laid back down.

Sharon came by to pick Stan up an hour later. Before the Marshes left Stan and Kyle shared a look. Stan tugged on his mother's leg.

"Mom? Me n' Kyle was thinking of something."

"Okay…"

"Um, Mom? We wanted to know if we can have a sleep over," Kyle looked to his mother.

Sharon and Sheila looked surprised.

"A sleep over? Do you boys even know what that is?" Sheila asked.

"Stan said it's when you play all day long and eat snacks and watch movies and sleep," Kyle answered.

"Well, well I don't know what to think… Sharon?"

Sharon bit her lip. "Boys, you're only four."

"So?" they said at the same time.

"Most four-year-olds don't have sleepovers," Sheila told them.

"Why not?" they cried.

"Well, they just don't. You boys are too little for a sleepover," Sharon said simply.

"Shelley got to have one!" Stan made fists and stomped a foot in the floor.

"Well, well she's older than you Stanley."

"That's not fair! She always gets to do stuff that I can't! I never get to do _any_thing!"

"That's not true"-

"_She_ got to go on the roller coaster with Gramma and Granpa! _She_ stays up later! _She_ has a two-wheel bike! _She_ can have liddle hard candy!" Stan stomped his foot each time he said one.

"It's because she's older Stanley, it has nothing to do with- with attention or anything," Sharon looked up at Sheila for help but she looked back helplessly, only knowing what it was like to have one child to deal with.

"I wanna sleepover too!" Stan wailed.

"Stan"-

He began to cry and sank to the floor. Knowing a tantrum was about to erupt Sharon picked him up and said hastily to Sheila, "We'll talk more later, all right?"

It was a very noisy night at the Marsh household. Stan did not stop crying and whining the whole time. Randy walked up to his wife who dabbed at her forehead with her wrist with exhaustion after trying to brush Stan's teeth.

"What's the matter with him anyway?" Randy asked.

"I doubt he even knows anymore."

"He hasn't shut-up all day."

"Apparently he and Kyle want to have a sleepover," Sharon raised a brow.

"What? But they're four."

"I know. But I don't think it's that big of a deal anymore. You know how little kids are, they cry and cry and cry for hours and soon enough, they forget why they're upset in the first place."

Randy rubbed his chin and walked into his son's room where he was currently sitting on his bed with a scowl on his face.

"Hey pal, what's wrong?"

"Mommy said I can't have a sleepover," Stan spat.

"Oh, well uh, you're just too young for one, that's all."

"How am I too young? We'll just be doin' the same stuff we always do," Stan argued.

"True, but you can't always do the same things your big sister can. You have to stop getting so upset over that Stanley."

Stan then noticed his mom in the doorframe. He ran up to her. "Mom, Mommy, why can't we have a sleepover? For _reals_."

Sharon felt pressured as her son and husband stared at her. She put a strand of hair behind her hair and sat down on Stan's bed. "Well, I suppose no real big reason. I just think you're a little young. I know you boys think it will be a lot of fun but you're only four, you get tired pretty easily. I don't want you to get your hopes up high because you're going to barely last through one movie."

"Nu-uhhh," Stan insisted.

Sharon sighed. "I'll talk to Kyle's mother tomorrow."

"So- does that mean- yes?" Stan blinked blue eyes at her.

"It means- maybe."

Stan jumped around now. "Yaaa! It means maybe! It means maybe!"

With that 'maybe' hanging around the air Sharon was finally able to tuck Stan into bed peacefully. So the next day the two mothers discussed the idea after they picked the boys up from preschool.

"When I think about it, it's not that huge of a deal," Sharon shrugged.

"I don't know Sharon. Like you said, they probably won't have a lot of fun since they'll tire out quickly."

"So what if it happens? I'm sure they'll treasure everything they do together. We can drop them off earlier so they have more time to play and won't feel as upset when if they don't get to do a lot at night."

Sheila frowned in thought as she watched the two boys chase each other down the empty hall.

"Well, all right then."

"Boys! Boys!" Sharon called.

"Yeah?" they asked, smiling and out-of-breath.

"We've decided you can have a sleepover," Sheila told them.

"Yaaa!" they danced around holding hands.

"So, the question is, whose house?" Sharon looked at them.

"I wanna stay at Kyle's!" Stan pointed at him.

"Oh?"

"Yeah, that way- Shelley won't bug is. If we stayed at our house she'd only pick on us all night," Stan pointed out.

Sheila shrugged. "I don't mind hosting at all."

"Well it's settled then, you get to sleepover at Kyle's next week Stan!" Sharon beamed.

The wait for next Saturday was almost killing Stan. He could not wait to spend the whole day with his best friend, playing and eating fun stuff. He just hoped Mrs. Broflovski would make them good snacks; she liked to give out fruits and veggies during snack-time. After lunch Sharon drove Stan to the Broflovski's, sleeping bag and other essentials in toe.

"You won't get sick of each other all day will you?" Sharon asked him.

"No, we're gonna have a lotta fun!" Stan piped up.

"Well okay then."

Sharon stepped inside the house for a few minutes after bringing Stan. She held up a bag of candy to Sheila.

"Here, I thought I should bring along something for the boys to snack on," she smiled.

"Oh…" Sheila never had that much candy in her home at one time beside the holidays.

"Don't worry, I already picked out the ones they could choke on," Sharon said as if that was what the other mother's worry was.

"Right. T-thanks Sharon."

"Your mom bought candy?" Kyle gasped.

"Yeah!" Stan smiled.

"My mom _never_ buys me candy."

"Well now we can eat it all day long!"

Kyle looked only too eager.

Sharon bent down to her son then. "Okay then sweetie, I'm going to leave."

"Okay."

"You'll be fine without me right?"

Stan nodded. "I told Daddy I was a big boy."

"Okay. If you have troubles breathing I showed Kyle's mother how to use your nebulizer. If for any reason you want to go home, I'm just a phone call away, okay?"

Stan nodded again. "Don't eat too much candy. I love you." she kissed his cheek before leaving.

The boys put Stan's things in Kyle's room before breaking into his toy box and began racing cars around. Stan had a lot of fun all day long with Kyle, playing and drawing and running around. He painted a picture of Shelley with stink marks and the boys laughed about it for hours.

"I'm gonna put it on her door when I get home," Stan said proudly.

"What if she hits you?"

"It's worth the hit."

Dinner was an interesting experience for Stan. They ate beef stew that was 'Kosher'. He had no idea what that was but he liked it. After dinner the boys and Kyle's parents put in the movie Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs where Sheila allowed them to eat the candy Sharon had brought over- only three pieces each though. By 9 PM they had gotten sleepy and went to get ready for bed. It was weird for Stan to have someone else but his mommy help him with the buttons on his pajamas and brush his teeth. He however did not lie down on the make-shift bed on Kyle's floor when Sheila said it was time to sleep.

"Wait- isn't my mommy gonna come?" he asked.

"What's that Stanley?"

"My mom- isn't she gonna kiss me good-night?" he clutched onto his beloved stuffed dog Ruffy.

"Your mom is home honey."

"But- but she's coming back to say good-night right?"

"No Stanley."

Stan frowned as his eyes shifted from Kyle to Kyle's mother. His mom wasn't coming back? She always kissed him good-night and read him a story. He couldn't remember a night she didn't do it.

"She's not coming back?" Stan said in a wavy voice.

"Not until tomorrow Stanley," Sheila answered sweetly.

Stan's eyes glassed over. He didn't hear the word 'tomorrow', all he heard was 'not until' and those two words usually meant a long time of waiting. He sniffled.

"But I want her t-to," he said.

"Do you want me to tell you a story?" Sheila asked the little boy.

Stan sniffed again but nodded so Sheila took out a Thomas the Tank Engine book and began to read, but Stan's tears only came back. She didn't read like how his mommy did. He began to cry.

"What is it Stanley?" Sheila asked in alarm.

"I thought you liked Thomas," Kyle asked, frowning.

"You don't r-read it like my mommy," Stan cried.

"Oh. Well, how does she read it?"

Stan didn't answer; he only cried more.

"Is there anything else I can do so you can fall asleep easier?" Sheila placed a hand on his shoulder.

Stan suddenly missed home and his parents. He could not fall asleep without the usual bedtime routine he was used to.

"I wanna go home," Stan finally spoke.

Sheila felt bad for the boy; they were so close to wrapping up their first sleepover.

"But it's already nighttime Stanley, it's time for bed."

"I wanna go home," Stan said again, hugging Ruffy.

Sheila looked to her own son for his reaction. Kyle looked sad that Stan wanted to leave.

"Kyle will be sad if you go back home," Sheila tried but Stan didn't seem to care. His eyes were wide with fright; he had to go home now. "Well, if you really want to go home…" she called Sharon up and told her the situation.

"Oh dear, I was hoping he'd make it through the night," Sharon sighed when Sheila had called.

"I know but the poor thing really looks upset."

Sharon decided it was best to pick Stan up so she got in the car and drove to the Broflovski house. As soon as the front door opened Stan ran to his mother and did not let go.

"Why don't you want to stay the rest of the night?" Sharon asked her son.

"I miss you," Stan told her.

Sharon smiled. "I miss you too but I think Kyle was planning on you staying the whole night."

Stan shook his head, arms still around her neck. Sharon sighed but picked up Stan's things.

"Maybe we can try it another time," Sheila said in an upbeat manner.

"Yes, when the boys are better prepared. Thank-you anyway."

Stan fell asleep instantly after his mom tucked him in bed. Sharon was tempted to tell him 'I told you that you were too young for a sleepover' but refrained. The next time might be better. Stan felt awkward around Kyle that Monday at preschool.

"Sorry I didn't wanna stay all night at your house," he told him as he dug a foot in the floor.

"I guess it's okay. But I wish you woulda stayed a bit longer."

Stan sighed. "Maybe our moms were right; we're too young for a sleepover."

Kyle picked up a ball from the toy bin. "We aren't too little, we just gotta try harder next time."

'Next time' came that June, the first day after preschool had ended. The boys felt more confident to have a sleepover, plus Kyle had turned five a month ago and felt extra excited to show off how much older he was. Their moms didn't try and force them out of the idea when they brought it up again. But Sharon had an idea that she thought would make her son feel braver.

"Why don't I host the sleepover Stan? That way you can be home the whole time," Sharon smiled down on him.

"No!" he cried.

She was taken aback.

"No, I wanna try it again at Kyle's house…" Stan didn't look his mother in the eye, nor his best friend. The only reason he wanted to was to prove that he could do it this time. Plus, if Kyle stayed at his house he was sure he'd be able to stay the whole night without a fuss, proving he was braver than he was. Stan did not want Kyle to show off like that.

The mothers decided to get everything prepared for what the boys dubbed, 'the real sleepover.' The whole week leading up to it Stan was preparing himself for the big day. He even was able to fall asleep one night without a bedtime story- although he wished he had had one. Sharon decided to drop Stan off just in time for dinner Saturday, that way he wouldn't miss her as long. She had also brought along cupcakes for the boys. They weren't as bad as sticky candy so Sheila didn't put up a fuss. Before Sharon left she bent down to Stan.

"You be a big boy okay?" she beamed at him.

"I will."

"Don't forget to tell Mrs. Broflovski if you have troubles breathing all right? She'll give you a breathing treatment if you do."

Stan nodded.

Sharon squeezed him and planted a big kiss on his cheek. "I know you'll be fine honey. I'll see you tomorrow okay?"

Stan gave his mom one last hug for reassurance before she left. This was it, a whole night and morning without his family. He could do it this time, he knew he could. The Broflovski's had another kosher meal for dinner that night before the boys went up to Kyle's room to play. Stan especially loved to play with the new dump truck Kyle got for his birthday. Unfortunately, so did Kyle so squabbles over it were the norm now. Gerald was downstairs watching TV when he heard the shouts from upstairs. He sighed and went to see what the trouble was. He found Stan crying and throwing crayons at Kyle while Kyle made faces at him, dodging the sticks of color.

"What's going on boys?" Gerald asked.

"He was trying to steal my truck Daddy!" Kyle exclaimed, pointing a finger at his friend.

"I was not!" Stan huffed.

"He was puttin' it in his bag and everything."

"I just wanna play wif it!"

"You already got to play with it boogerhead!" Kyle taunted.

"I am _not_ a boogerhead, you booger_brain_!"

"C'mon you two, let's calm down shall we? Now, what _really_ happened?" Gerald asked, kneeling.

"We was just playing with our cars and trucks. I turned around and- and next thing I saw was _Stan_ putting _my_ dump truck in _his_ bag!"

Stan just crossed his arms and glared.

"Is that true Stanley?"

"I just wanted to play wif it!" Stan cried again.

"It's mine; you don't get to play with it!" Kyle hugged the toy to him.

Gerald thought for a second before saying, "Look boys, fighting won't solve anything. Stan, it's not nice to try and take other kid's toys. And Kyle, it's not nice to hog your toys."

The boys were still glaring at each other.

"I know you love your truck Kyle, but so does Stan. And since it's yours you get to play with it every day, Stan can't. So the nice thing to do is to share it with him when he's over okay?" he explained.

Kyle shifted.

"Now say sorry boys," Gerald stood up again.

Both boys shifted embarrassed before uttering, "Sorry," to each other.

"Good. Now come downstairs soon, we're going to put on Bambi okay?"

"Yaaaa!" Stan began to twirl around. Bambi was his favorite movie.

The boys enjoyed the classic Disney tale as they were allowed to eat two chocolate cupcakes that Sharon had made. Although they split a third- making a mess of it and smearing the cream cheese frosting over their mouths to make funny faces. It was soon time for bed and once again Stan had to feel extremely awkward as Sheila helped him into his footie pajamas and brushed his teeth. But the real test of bravery came after- the actual lying in bed. Sheila had read a book Stan had brought over- The Magical Elephant, to the boys that night. Sharon thought it would be easier for Stan to fall asleep to one of his favorite books. Fifteen minutes later Sheila made sure the boys were snug in their beds before switching the light off. Stan breathed a sigh of relief when he saw the room bask in the light of a truck-shaped nightlight. It was reassuring for him to know that Kyle was still afraid of the dark like him. But Stan still sat up when Sheila was about to leave.

"What is it Stanley?" Sheila asked.

Stan gulped. "Can- can I call my mom?"

Sheila frowned. "But I thought you were going to be able to fall asleep tonight."

"I know but can I just- just tell her goodnight?" that's all he needed was for his mommy to tell him goodnight like she did every night, then he'd be okay.

"Well- well I guess you can…"

Stan turned to Kyle. "Don't worry Kyle, I promise I'm gonna stay."

Kyle smiled happily as he watched his best friend follow his mother downstairs. Sharon bit her lip when she got the phone call from Sheila but was relieved to know that Stan was still planning to stay the night.

"Night Mommy," Stan told her as he held the phone to him.

"Good-night sweetie. I promise I'll pick you up after breakfast okay?" Sharon said on the other end.

"'Kay. I'm a big boy, I'm gonna stay all night," Stan told his mother proudly.

"Okay. Goodnight sweetie."

"Night Mommy." Satisfied and reassured, Stan gave the phone back to Mrs. Broflovski and skipped upstairs. He got under his covers and was out like a light ten minutes later.

Stan awoke the next morning by Kyle calling him and jumping on the make-shift bed he was on.

"Breakfist Stan! Breakfist!" he kept saying.

Stan followed him downstairs and to the smell of bacon sizzling on the stove. He dug into his bacon and eggs and triangle of toast and drank from his sippy cup. But stopped when he saw that Kyle was drinking from a normal cup.

"You- you don't have a sippy anymore?" Stan asked.

"Naw, my mom got rid of 'em all. Said it was better for my teeth if I drank from real cups. Look, I get to use fun straws now!" Kyle showed Stan the loopy straw he was drinking from.

Stan looked at his purple cup and frowned. He wanted to be just like Kyle. He may not say anything but Stan knew Kyle thought he was a baby at times. It wasn't his fault; Shelley didn't go a day without telling him scary stories about growing up or hurting him. But Stan decided to have enough; he took the top off his cup (after some difficulty) and drank from it like Kyle was. He smiled; he could taste the milk a lot more without a top over it. He knew Kyle was his best friend for a reason. When Sharon came by to pick him up an hour later, Stan wasted no time in telling her what a big boy he was.

"I slept all night, just like I said! And guess what else Mom? I can drink from a big-kid cup now!" Stan cried happily.

"Really? Oh, I'm so proud of you Stanley!" she kissed him and looked up to Sheila. "You have _no_ idea how long I've been trying to get him off the sippy cups. His dentist always asks if I have yet and now _finally_…"

"Well he was just watching Kyle and did what he was doing," Sheila smiled.

"Did you boys have a fun night?" Sharon asked them.

"Yes!" they chimed at the same time.

"Can we invite Kyle over our house next week?" Stan looked up to Sharon.

"Um, we'll see honey. There's still all summer to do it."

The boys said their final goodbyes before the Marshes went home. Stan couldn't have felt happier at that moment, he had a lot of fun with Kyle last night and was able to sleep in a bedroom that wasn't his, and he could now use real cups with cool straws. But the best thing wasn't any of those; Stan smiled as he held onto Kyle's beloved dump truck which he said he could borrow for the week. Yes, Kyle sure was the best friend any four-year-old could ever have.

_There you have it, the boys' first sleep-over. A lot of fun to write, as they always are at this age. Come back for more as I have more ideas up my sleeve! Please review._

_Magical love: Rose, June 30, 2010_


	4. An Adventure in the Mall

**AN ADVENTURE IN THE MALL**

It was September 8th, Saturday, 2006 and the boys were all gathered at Stan's house for their mothers have decided to take the kids out for a fun day at the mall to celebrate their first week of kindergarten. Shelley was coming too but thought it was really lame and wanted to stay home instead.

"Your father is having a day out with the other dads today Shelley, you can't stay home alone," Sharon told her for the tenth time.

"You didn't do anything special for me when _I_ went to kindergarten," Shelley told her.

"Yes we did. We went out for pizza that Friday, remember?"

"I don't want to go shopping with four little turds," Shelley complained.

"I know you don't want to come with us but if you don't stop complaining we aren't going to stop at the Pretzel Hut," Sharon told her as she got her bag ready.

"But I want a pretzel!"

"Then you'll stop complaining. Go back downstairs; you're supposed to be keeping an eye out on the boys."

Meanwhile five-year-old Kyle, Cartman, and Kenny, and four-and-half-year-old Stan were playing downstairs while their mothers were getting ready.

"Do you think they'll stop at the toy store?" Kyle asked the three other boys.

"I hope," Kenny mumbled.

"They _better_," Cartman said angrily. "My mom said I could get a new toy."

"It's poblobly gonna be the last place they stop at," Stan groaned. "They're gonna drag us through the boring stores like Macy's first."

"I _hate_ Macy's," Cartman stamped his foot.

"Yeah, they always spray my mom wif ten differnt perfumes every time. It makes me cough," Stan said.

Their mothers came downstairs a minute later.

"Are you boys ready?" Sharon asked.

"Yes!" they chimed.

They got into two cars and drove off to South Park Mall. When they reached it, Stan pulled out a notepad and a red crayon.

"What's that you got there?" Sharon asked her son as she helped him out.

"I'm gonna make a list of all the things I want for my birthday," Stan smiled at her.

"Oh? They're teaching you how to write the first week of kindergarten?" she said amused.

Stan nodded. "I already know my name starts with an S! And yours does too Mommy. And Shelley's. See?" he drew his version of an 'S' on his pad to show her but it looked more like a scribble.

Sharon nodded, pretending to know what he wrote down before everyone walked into the mall. True to Stan's word, as soon as they stepped into the first shop, Macy's, people selling the latest in sprays and perfumes walked up to Sharon, Sheila, and Liane. Stan hung back by a rack of coats so as not to sniff in the scents, afraid it would kick up his asthma. The mothers took a good twenty minutes hanging by the make-up and perfume, boring the boys endlessly. They tried to chase each other down the floor but were quickly told off by their moms. After they were through with the make-up, the women dragged the boys to the bras.

"When are we gonna look at stuff for us?" Stan whined as he sank to the floor.

"Huh? Oh yes, I suppose you're right honey. We can come back here later. Let's look at the boys' clothing!" Sharon exclaimed.

"I didn't mean _that_."

But they were taken to the boy's clothing section of the store and were soon given options of what to wear.

"We already went clothes shopping before school," Kyle told Sheila.

"I know but you can never have too many clothes. Oh look at these overalls!" Sheila held up a pair of green overalls to him.

"I _hate_ overalls Mom."

"Oh look poopsikins, these jeans look like they might actually fit you!" Liane told her son.

"Mooooom," Cartman moaned while Stan and Kyle laughed.

The boys were less-than enthusiastic to be looking for new clothes. All three mothers had already shopped for clothes for kindergarten weeks ago, why did they need any more? By the time they were all through with picking out new outfits and buying them it was time for lunch. Shelley groaned when she was told she had to look out for the four boys while Sharon, Sheila, and Liane bought food for everyone. The boys pulled out the toys they had brought along with them and began to play around the table they were at and the chairs.

"'Help me! Help me! I can't swim!'" Kenny said in a higher voice while he dangled a clown doll over the edge of a table.

"'Don't worry Bobby, we'll save you!" Stan declared as he pulled out his beloved stuffed dog Ruffy and put him on a toy car of Kyle's. Kyle made car sounds before driving it over the table. Stan was just about to grab the clown when something made all three toys fall to the floor- a Mega Robot, flown by Cartman.

"Not today you won't!" he called.

"Hey! We were just about to save him!" Stan cried.

"Yeah, why do you always have to kill our toys?" Kyle demanded.

"'Cause I have Megabot and he's the coolest toy of them all."

"He is not," Kyle argued.

"Is too! You're just sad 'cause I got him for my birthday and yooooouuuu didn't!"

"I never wanted him for my birthday!"

"Is that jelly-sy I hear?" Cartman put a hand around his ear.

"It is not because Megabot is stupid!" Kyle called.

"He's only the coolest toy ever! He can walk and talk and move his arms!"

"He's a shit toy," Stan said matter-of-factly.

Shelley then gasped and pointed to him. "Oooohhh! You said a curse word!"

"I- I did not!"

"Yes you did!" Shelley never looked happier that day than she did now. "I'm telling Mom and you're going to be in troooouble!"

"I didn't say anything!"

"You said the 'S' word!"

"Nu-uh! Please Shelley, please don't tell Mom!" Stan pleaded.

"Where'd you learn that word anyway?" Shelley asked gleefully.

"Nowhere!"

Kenny chose this moment to feign interest in his clown figurine. Stan shook in his chair when he saw his mother return with food. Shelley smirked at him as she took her chicken sandwich off the tray.

"Hey Mom, guess what Stan just said?"

"I did not!" Stan cried as Sharon placed a kid's meal from Wendall's Burgers in front of him.

"What did he say, Shelley?" Sharon asked, mildly interested.

"He said a curse word!"

"I did not! I did not! I did not!" Stan banged his legs on the chair.

"You did so! He said the 'S' word!"

"Shut-up dummybrain!"

Sharon frowned. "Stan said a curse word? Shelley, it's not good to lie."

Shelley's eyes grew wide. "What? I'm not lying! I heard him say it!"

Stan looked at his friends helplessly.

"Stan didn't say anything Mrs. Marsh," Kyle said innocently.

"Yeah, we was only playing like good kids," Cartman said, just as sweetly back.

"You said the's' word and you know it Stan!" Shelley pointed at him again.

"Shelley, he's four, where will he have learned any bad words in the first place?" Sharon asked, annoyed as she ate.

"I don't know but he did! I told you before I heard him curse. Last week when he dropped the cookie he was holding he said Damnit," Shelley insisted.

Sharon glared at her daughter. "I'm not having this conversation again Shelley. Your little brother is too young to say those words and there isn't any place he would have heard them. Maybe from your dad here and there… but I have yet to hear Stanley curse. Now eat."

Stan smiled, stuck his tongue out at his sister and began to eat. How many times he got off safe from punishment from his parents he didn't know, but he liked it. He was only four; he was still 'innocent.'

After the lunch the boys were taken to the small but fun indoor playground in the mall to burn off some of their energy. Shelley kept complaining about doing something _she_ wanted to do. Sharon told her to play on the playground too but she refused saying at eight, she was too old to play on such a babyish-looking area. After thirty minutes the mothers told the boys they could each get a special sweet treat at one of the several shops in the store. But before, Sharon bought a bored Shelley a warm pretzel from Pretzel Hut. Stan, Kyle, Cartman, and Kenny had difficulty choosing something from Candy World, The Krazy Cookie, and Rocky Mountain Sweets. It was especially hard for Kenny whose parents couldn't afford special treats for him. He rested on choosing five different candies in a little bag from Candy World, while Stan walked out of The Krazy Cookie with a brownie cookie, Kyle's mother bought him two chocolate-dipped strawberries from Rocky Mountain Sweets, and Cartman had a bag half full of candy from Candy World.

Currently the boys were enjoying their sweets outside of a shoe store, not minding their moms browsing in a boring shop for they had something to occupy themselves with. Stan looked over to Cartman who was sitting next to him and devouring the candy in his bag.

"Can I have a shark?" Stan asked.

"What?"

"A shark"- Stan pointed to a blue gummi shark in the bag.

Cartman laughed. "Yeah right! If you wanted candy you shoulda gotten candy!"

"But I love gummi sharks."

"You can't have none!" Cartman said, hugging the bag to him greedily.

"That's not fair! You have like, ten left still!"

Cartman stuck his tongue out. Stan gritted his teeth and tried to grab a shark but Cartman pulled away.

"Damnit Cartman, let me have one!" Stan cried.

"Mom's going to kill you when she finds out you cursed twice _and_ are fighting," Shelley told her little brother as she leaned against the wall, having been put in charge of the boys once again.

"She didn't believe you already, she's not gonna believe you again," Stan said smugly before trying to grab a shark again. Ever since the summer he had designated himself a stronger person than he was in preschool. He was still terrified of things like shots and doctor appointments and snakes but he was defiantly in charge of the foursome now and usually came up with all the rules and ideas during playtime. And now Cartman was going to give him a gummi shark whether he liked it or not!

"If you don't give me a gummi shark I'm going to tell your mommy that you pushed Butters in class yesderday and he cried!" Stan said.

"All right, fine, baby," Cartman finally gave him a shark.

Kyle, who had already finished his strawberries, peaked inside the shoe store. "When are they gonna be done?"

"When are we going to the toy store?" Kenny moaned.

Cartman smiled then. "We can go now."

"Huh?" all three boys looked at him.

"Let's go to the toy store."

"Dummy, we can't, our moms are still shopping," Stan pointed out.

"Dummy, we _can_, I know where it is," Cartman rolled his eyes.

"We can't leave, that's stupid," Kyle said.

"We can so. Our moms are gonna keep dragging us inside store after boring store. I heard my mom wanted to go into the book store after this," Cartman added wisely.

"Not the book store," Stan whined.

"The book store is fun," Kyle said simply.

"Only if my mommy gets me a book for bedtime. Other'ise, it sucks," Stan said, arms crossed.

"Look you stupid babies, we're never gonna get to the toy store at this rate so we've got to go when we have the chance," Cartman told them.

"What does 'rate' mean?" Stan asked.

Cartman ignored him. "Are we going to the toy store or not?"

"Yes!" all three said.

"Then let's go. Don't worry, we'll be back before they even know we're gone," Cartman told Stan who looked slightly reluctant to leave the proximity of his mother's presence.

Stan walked up to Shelley. "Um, Shelley…"

"_What_ turd?"

"Um, me and the guys were going to go to the toy store."

She raised a brow.

"Cartman knows where it is. We wanna get there good and early, before our moms."

She shrugged. "Fine, go." The less time she had to spend watching the little annoying monsters the better.

Stan frowned before following after the other three, the rest of his cookie in his hand. The mall looked even bigger at this view for the boys, especially without the aid of their mothers carrying them or holding their hands. But they were excited; they could go anywhere they wanted now! Kyle pointed to the left after a few minutes of walking.

"Let's go into the Discov'ry Store!"

"That's boring," Stan rolled his eyes.

"Only nerdy Jews like the Discov'ry Store," Cartman noted.

"Shut-up fatass! It is so fun; they have a play area for kids inside! It has a huge train track and everything!" Kyle yelled.

Cartman frowned. "It does not."

"Does so, I go there with my parents all the time."

"Let's just go, we can all go somewhere we wanna go, now that our mommies aren't with us," Stan told them.

"All right then, I wanna go back to Candy World 'cause my mom gave me this"- Cartman held up a $5 bill.

"You know how to use it?" Stan asked, eyeing the paper.

"Yeah, I only see my mom buy me stuff all the time."

"Fine, then I want to go to the pet store," Stan declared.

"This is going to be fun, without our moms," smiled Kyle.

So the boys walked into the Discovery Store, filled with all sorts of books and things about the world and nature and science. Kyle's eyes lit up at every turn. They walked to the back of the store where Cartman did indeed see a train table with some other toys and play things. He raced the other boys there and pushed Kenny away when he made a grab for the train.

"I'm playing with it first!" he called.

"You already have a table like this!" Kenny cried.

Cartman didn't listen; he just quickly put together some parts for the train and began driving it around. Stan quickly found another cool toy to occupy himself with, a giant magnifying glass.

"Hey Kyle! Look!" Stan placed his hand under the scope. "Look at how big my hand looks!"

"I know huh? Once I put a ball under it, it was huge!"

Stan giggled as he wiggled his fingers around under the scope before putting the remains of his cookie under it. "Lookit my cookie!"

"Did you eat the shark yet?" Kyle asked.

"Yeah," Stan said sadly. "Hey Cartman! Give me 'nother shark!"

Cartman glared back. "I alriddy gave you a shark stupid!"

"Well give me 'nother one! I wanna see it under the- the"- he looked to Kyle for help.

"It's a mic'oscope," Kyle told him.

"Mic'ocope," Stan frowned.

Cartman rolled his eyes to see what the other two were so interested in.

"Hey, look at your cookie Stan," Cartman pointed out. "It looks even more better than it did."

"I know." Stan took his cookie out of the toy finally and ate it, before Cartman tried to snatch it.

The boys had a fun time all in all at the Discovery Store. They found a lot of fun gadgets on display there and toys to play with but they spent most of their time at the play area and because of this no one questioned why they weren't with any parents.

"Told you that was fun," Kyle said smartly as they walked out.

"The only fun part was the train. And breaking that one girl's stick of chalk," Cartman chuckled.

"That part was mean," Kyle spat.

"Nu-uh, she was crying. It was funny."

"Where to now?" Stan looked around.

"The candy store!" Cartman cried and began to waddle off. The boys had no choice but to follow after. As soon as they walked in Cartman got out a new bag and began to fill it with sweets. It was not very fun for the boys who didn't have any money to spend on candy.

"This isn't very fun Cartman," Stan pointed out after several minutes, arms crossed.

"Is it _my_ fault my mom gave me money and yours didn't?" Cartman teased.

"You're too fat, you don't need anymore candy!" Kyle pointed out.

"Whatevah, I do what I want!" Cartman taunted and continued to pour M&Ms in his bag. Ten minutes later his bag was full and he proudly set it on the cashier's table.

The cashier blinked his eyes at the four boys. "Your moms around boys?"

They looked at each other.

"They're in the store next to us. They said we can get candy," Cartman said clearly. Stan had a feeling he had plenty of practice with this lie.

"Oh? Well, all right then…" he weighed the candy. "That will be $16.50 boys."

Cartman handed over the $5 bill happily. The cashier raised a brow.

"This is only five dollars kid," the man told him.

"So? Just use it so we can go."

"You can't pay me five dollars for something that comes out to seventeen dollars."

"I- don't see a diff'rence," Cartman blinked.

"You're around ten dollars too short, sorry son."

"What?" Cartman cried.

"You dumbass Cartman! We haven't learneded anything about money in school yet!" Stan told him.

The cashier was surprised at the little boy's mouth. Stan didn't care, he cursed three times now at the fat boy, he was so annoying today!

"You can just have your moms come over and pay for the rest," the cashier told them.

"Ummm…" Stan trailed.

"They're too busy shoppin'," Kyle said.

"Then sorry boys."

Cartman growled. "Fine, how much do we get for you to take the five money?"

Minutes later the boys walked out the candy shop, Cartman fuming.

"I only got a little! Barely nothing!" Cartman spoke as he examined what little candy was in his new bag.

"Just add that in your other bag and it'll look like more," Kyle suggested.

"Shut-up!"

They began to walk from the store, Cartman and Kyle going back and forth at each other again.

"Um, guys?" Stan asked suddenly, over their arguing.

"What?" Cartman said impatiently.

"Where- where are we?"

"What do you mean 'where are we'?" Cartman said, eating his candy.

"Where are we?"

The boys looked up and realized that nothing looked familiar and with all the people walking around them it was impossible to tell. They stood closer together.

"You got us lost!" Kyle pointed a finger at Cartman.

"Me? I was just followin' you assholes!"

"You were the one who led us to the candy store," Stan pointed out.

"And now we're lost!"

"We aren't lost dummies, we just gotta know where we are," Cartman said simply unfazed.

"We _don't_ know where we are!" Kyle reminded him.

"We just came from Candy World didn't we?" Cartman said obviously.

"It doesn't help now as we can't see nothing," Stan said as he looked around the shops.

"It's fine. I got lost in the mall before. We just have to find a store that looks familiar," Cartman said as if none of this was a problem.

The four boys looked around. They were only four and five and barely knew how to read. Even Kyle, who was the furthest along in language, could not make out the words on the signs around them. But the boys immediately sought him out to help them navigate around.

"Hey Kyle, what does C A R L S F- um, I dunno the next letter.. R um…I T…R E spell?" Stan asked his best friend, pointing at the sign above him which read CARL'S FURNITURE.

"Carl's… something," Kyle shrugged.

"How 'bout this one?" Kenny asked, pointing at LISA'S ANTIQUES.

"I don't know."

"Hey Kyle!"

"I don't know Stan!" Kyle snapped.

"I thought you knew how to read," Stan crossed his arms.

"I do, a little. I've never seen any of these words before."

"Well great, now the Jew can't help us," Cartman crossed his arms too.

"I can so!"

"Not again," Stan moaned.

"So now what do we do?" Kenny asked.

"Try and find our moms," Stan told them.

"How?" Kyle asked him.

"I dunno, we just gotta find a way. They wouldn't leave wifout us so; we hafta keep our eyes open."

"Do you think they know we're gone by now?" Kyle asked after several minutes of walking.

"I'm sure. My mom wouldn't trust Shelley to look after us mor'n a hundret minutes," Stan told Kyle.

"Has it been a hundret minutes yet then?" Cartman asked.

"Uuuhhh… yeah. I think so. C'mon you guys, our moms must be looking for us right now!"

Meanwhile, back at Shoetopia Sharon, Sheila, and Liane stepped out, each carrying a bag. Sharon spotted her daughter but not her son. She frowned.

"Shelley, where are the boys?"

Shelley looked up from her hands. "I don't know."

"Wh-what do you mean you don't know?"

"Stan just said they were going somewhere."

"_Where_ Shelley?" Sharon demanded.

"The toy store."

"What what what?" Sheila cried. "But they don't know how to get to the toy store themselves!"

"Well that's where they said they were going," Shelley shrugged, obviously unconcerned.

"When did they leave?" Sharon asked her daughter.

"Hm… maybe an hour ago?"

"_Why didn't you stop them_?"

Again, Shelley shrugged.

"They are four and five Shelley! I cannot believe"- Sharon drew in a deep breath. "Never mind, we have to find them _now_. You are in a lot of trouble when we get home young lady!"

The mothers hurried out to begin their search. Liane said she would go wait at the toy store to see if they showed up there while Sharon and Sheila went off to find the first mall cop they could. Meanwhile, the four boys were at the other side of the mall, trying to find any sign of their mothers. A young man walked up to them suddenly.

"Hey, you boys shouldn't be wandering around the mall on your own," he told them.

"We know," they said together.

"I suggest you find your parents before something happens," he told them before walking into the shop behind him.

"Stupidhead, what does it look like we're trying to do?" Cartman called after him.

"Never mind, c'mon," Stan pulled on the cubby boy's sleeve and they continued to walk again.

"I'm going to be in so much trouble when my mom finds out I wandered off. She's gonna throw away all my toys!" Kyle moaned.

Stan was more worried about not finding his mom at all than what she might do to him once he was found. All the people walking around them were ten feet taller than them and he couldn't read any of the signs around. Cartman was worried too but he didn't want to show it, he was the best of all four of them. Kenny wasn't scared at all; his family was home so even if he didn't find the mothers of his friends, he'd be able to find the exit and home, eventually.

Sharon and Sheila were able to track down a mall cop.

"Please Mister, you have to help us," Sheila cried.

"What seems to be the problem?" the blond man asked.

"You have to find our boys, they're lost," Sharon said.

"Lost?"

"Yes, they were only feet from us and before we knew it they were gone," Sheila explained.

They didn't want to tell him the real reason as to why they were missing.

"Well all right then. Do you have a description of the boys?"

"Yes. In fact, here's a picture"- Sharon pulled out a picture of her son with Cartman from Stan's fourth birthday party while Sheila pulled one out of Kyle. They however did not have a picture of Kenny but explained to the man he was a little boy in an orange hood with blond hair.

"Okay, I'll alert the other mall cops. A search will be out soon"-

Back to the boys; they had been walking a lot now and had to stop to rest their small bodies. They all sat under a building, thinking of what they had led themselves into now. Stan kicked off his shoes to rub his aching feet, sniffing all the way.

"We're never going to find them," Kyle said glumly.

"There's so many bigger people here, it'll take forever to pick our mommies out from them all," Stan rubbed his nose.

Cartman wasn't saying anything, now he missed his mom just like the others and couldn't hide it any longer. He put his head in his hands too, even forgetting about his bag of candy. The four boys sat under the window of the place they were at, frightened and alone in the big scary mall with too many big, scary people. How they wished they had just stayed put in front of the shoe store with Shelley, even if it wasn't fun. They were certainly not having any fun now.

Mr. Thomas was at his desk writing when he thought he heard something. Crying. He looked out the window of the security office in the mall to find four young boys crying under it.

"Boys! Boys!" he called.

They looked up.

"What on earth are you doing down there?"

"We c-can't find our mommies," Stan sniffed.

"You're lost?"

They all nodded.

"It's all our fault!" Kyle frowned.

"Wait a minute… I got a call not too long ago about four missing boys. You must be them," Mr. Thomas told them.

They looked at each other.

"Our moms know we're missing?" Kyle asked.

"Yes, yes. Oh wow, and here you are, at the best place to be if you were lost. Oh wow, come in, come in," he said gratefully.

"Mom said not to take offers from st'angers," Stan said carefully.

"I work at the mall to sort out problems like this. I help parents find their kids. I'm perfectly fine, trust me."

Shrugging they followed him inside the small office. A woman walked out of the back room suddenly.

"Marie, you will not believe it but these are the four boys who were reported missing!" Mr. Thomas told the blonde woman.

"Are you sure? What are your names boys?" she asked them.

They told them their names.

"You're right Rick. You boys are very lucky, your mommies called over an hour ago, wondering where you went."

Mr. Thomas got off a walkie talkie a minute later. "Boys, your mothers are coming down here shortly."

"Yaaaa!" they cheered.

"You poor things… say, how about I get you a snack while you wait, hm?" Marie smiled at them.

The security office door burst open five minutes later with Sharon, Sheila, and Liane, breathless.

"Mommy!" Stan got off his chair and ran to her.

"Oh Stanley baby!" she hugged him tight.

"We were so worried," Sheila told Kyle as she held him.

"I got more candy while we was gone," Cartman told Liane, showing her his bag.

"Look Mom, the lady gave us ice cream!" Stan held up an ice cream sandwich that was dripping all over his hands and face.

Sharon could not believe she was able to see her son's adorable messy face again after such a scare.

"Why did you boys run off like that?" she asked desperately.

"We just wanted to have fun and go to the toy store. But then we dedidied to go to other places too," Kyle said.

"You kids know never to go anywhere on your own," Sharon said.

"Shelley didn't care if we left though," Stan pointed to his older sister.

Sharon glared at her daughter.

"Are you _sure_ you're okay?" Sheila asked.

"We're fine," Kyle waved a hand to signify it.

Sharon sighed as she cleaned off the mess that was on her son's hands and face. "Well, I think after everything today, you've waited long enough to go to the toy store."

"_Finally_!" Kenny exasperated.

"We had no idea where it was," Stan said. "Mommy, can we go to the pet store too? I wanna write down all the animals I want for my birthday too."

"Yes, anything," Sharon said happily.

He high-fived Kyle. After much thanks to the mall cops and security office the mothers finally took their kids to K.C. Toy Store and the pet store. Although it was fun to go off on their own for a while, they realized they would much rather stay in the same spot as their mothers since it was so easy for them to be hurt or kidnapped in the mall. Maybe in another few years they could try it again, this time knowing which direction the toy store was in.

_I hope you liked this chapter. It was fun to get the boys acting more like how they are in the show. I am not quite sure what the next installment will be so it might take another two weeks for it. Thanks for the reviews, keep them coming! _

_Magical love: Rose, July 15, 2010_


	5. The First Time he Died

**THE FIRST TIME HE DIED**

It was a normal winter's day and Miss Claridge was explaining to her preschool class about the new playground equipment that had been installed in the small yard outside the class.

"Everyone had to remember to mind the rules okay? Do not handle the new equipment roughly; it has to last for all the other kids who will be using it over the years."

Eric Cartman raised his hand. "When do we get to play on it?" he demanded.

She glared at the only boy in her class who did not have manners. "When I am through talking Eric."

Cartman rolled his eyes.

"Do not push or shove each other on it or you can really get hurt. Are there any questions? Beside when do we get to play on it?" she added.

Five kids, including Cartman, put their hands down. She opened the back door. "Have fun children. Recess will be over in fifteen minutes okay?"

The sounds of three preschool classes full of kids were soon heard as they rushed out to their very own new play area outside. Cartman pushed his way up to the tallest slide, not caring if the other kids cried out in protest. Meanwhile Stan and Kyle stood by and watched the other kids arguing over who got to do where and play with what.

"Can you believe it Stan? We get our own playground, all to ourselves," Kyle noted.

"Yeah, just like the big kids. It's so _cool_."

They could hear Cartman's cries of protest on the equipment. Kyle rolled his eyes.

"I hope he falls and gets hurt like Miss Claridge said."

"Yeah," Stan agreed. His eyes then lit up. "Kyle! Look! Monkey bars!"

"Huh?"

Stan dragged his best friend over to a row of bars that hung five feet from the ground.

"I love monkey bars! They have really cool ones at the big kid part of school, Shelley told me."

"Really?"

"Yeah. And at the park. I love it; my mommy and daddy always help me though on them. But look! Now we can go on them ourselves!" Stan had glee in his eyes.

"I guess…" Kyle was never a fan of monkey bars; he loved playing tic-tac-toe on the moving blocks at parks more than anything.

Stan hurriedly climbed up the steps of the bars.

"Be careful Stan," Kyle warned.

"Dude, it's only like, not so many heights up," Stan rolled his eyes. He gripped the first bar, tongue between his teeth and began to go across.

"No way dude!" Kyle exclaimed.

"Told you- I can- do it!" Stan huffed, but fell into the sand three bars too short. He kicked the sand in anger. "Damnit!"

Kenny appeared next to them. "Have you been on the slides yet?" he asked.

"Naw, too crowded," Kyle said.

"I was just on the curvy one. It's cool!"

"It won't be as fun until everyone gets off," Stan pointed out.

"True, Cartman keeps pushing everyone around," Kenny said. "Man, it's so cool they have a playground at the school now! My mom never takes me to the park. It's like an early Christmas present."

Stan gasped. "It is! It's so cool! Santa must have known we wanted a place to play beside inside school, huh Kyle?"

Kyle frowned. "Who's Santa?"

Stan and Kenny shared a look.

"What do you mean 'who's Santa?'"

Kyle shrugged.

"He's the guy who brings you presents for Christmas! _Duh_!" Stan rolled his eyes again.

Kyle had no idea what his friends were talking about. Moments later Cartman appeared next to them.

"They won't let me go down the tallest slide! Boogerheads," he growled.

"Cartman, Kyle doesn't know who Santa is!" Stan pointed out.

Cartman blinked once before laughing. "Ha-haaaaa! What a loser! _Everyone_ knows Santa! I woulda thought Kenny wouldn't 'cause he's poor, but you? Hahahaha!" he pointed a finger at the redhead's glowing face.

"You better shut-up before I make you!" he threatened.

"C'mon you guys," Stan said slowly. He didn't like it when his friends fought.

All too soon Miss Claridge and the other two teachers called the kids in for class. They sadly walked over to the door, their only outside time over. After school their mothers picked them up and they all played at Stan's house while their moms talked.

"Did you two dummies even go on the playground?" Cartman demanded as they played with Stan's toys.

"No, there was too many people," Kyle said.

"Listen to him, the one who doesn't even know who Santa is!" Cartman chuckled.

Stan and Kenny had to laugh. Like Stan stated, everyone knew who Santa was. Kyle crossed his arms angrily.

"Stop laughing! 'Speically you Stan!" he spat.

"Sorry," Stan giggled.

"When I was on it, it was real high. I thought I could fly like Superman!" Kenny spoke.

"It was that high?" Stan asked.

"Uh-huh," he nodded. "I bet, if I tied a cape 'round me, I could fly off it."

"You think so?" Stan asked, eyes wide in wonderment.

"Yeah. I like high things. The world looks so cool from up high."

"Heights make me throw up," Stan said matter-of-factly.

"_Everything_ makes you throw up," Kyle corrected.

"You threw up when we was playing that spinning chair game in school last week!" Cartman laughed.

Kenny looked up from the plastic football in his hands. "So? You guys wanna help me be Superman at school?"

"Yeah!" they all agreed.

"What do we do?" Stan asked.

"I just need a cape."

"You hafta make sure the teacher doesn't see you or you'll be in trouble," Kyle warned.

"You guys gotta make sure she doesn't then."

"But we wanna see you fly. How are we stuppose to distract her _and_ watch you fly?" Stan asked.

"I don't know! Just do both things at once!" Kenny said, annoyed.

"Are you're really gonna do it?" Kyle looked at him.

"Yeah. I know I can fly."

Kenny had his heart out for flying and by Friday, he felt ready enough to do so. He had gone to school with a cape under his jacket, happy and excited. Kyle and Stan told him he didn't need a super hero mask because he already hid his face behind a scarf. Cartman thought it was stupid and wouldn't work but Kyle and Stan had a feeling he was just jealous he hadn't thought of it first. Luckily that Friday it was too cold and many of the students weren't up to playing on the cold, hard playground. The boys milled around carefully until Kenny was confident enough to take flight.

"Where ya gonna do it?" Stan said.

"On the top of the tower where the long slide is," Kenny pointed out.

"That's pretty dang'rous Kenny. You could get hurt," Kyle frowned.

"You ruin _everything_ Kahl," Cartman moaned.

"I do not! I just know that he could hit his head on the bars underneath," Kyle growled.

"If you're going to do it Kenny you bedder hurry, recess is almost over," Stan told the boy in orange.

"See ya on the ground you guys!" Kenny said as a farewell and climbed up to the tower of the tall slide. It was difficult to actually get on top of it but he managed to. His three friends looked up at him, excited. At that moment little Butters popped in next to them and saw what they saw.

"Oh gee whiz you guys, that looks awfully scary," he gulped.

"Shut-up Butters!" all three said.

"Kenny's gonna fly! He has a cape and ever'thing!" Stan jumped in happiness.

"He can fly?"

"Duh," Cartman rolled his eyes. "Anyone with a cape can fly. Don't you know any superheroes?"

"Jesus is my hero," Butters looked at his hands.

Cartman laughed. Kenny cleared his throat, bent his knees and put his arms out. He moved his legs this way three times before finally leaping off- his head hit the bars of part of the playground underneath-hard and he fell to the snow below. He did not move. The boys stood around for a minute, not knowing what to do. Finally-

"Kenny?" Kyle asked slowly.

"He's dead!" Butters gasped.

"He's not dead- is he?" Stan looked around uncertainly.

"We have to tell Miss Claridge!" Kyle gasped. Noticing the boy wasn't moving; Cartman and Stan agreed and ran to her.

"Miss Claridge! Miss Claridge!" they cried.

"What is it boys?"

"Kenny got hurt!"

They dragged her out and she gasped at the lifeless form in the snow. "Kenny? Kenny! Oh my goodness, someone! Get the school nurse!"

They saw a couple of classmates run off out of sight. The three boys gathered around the boy in the orange hood. Their teacher kept calling his name and shaking him but he wouldn't budge. Minutes later the school nurse came running by.

"What happened?" she asked around.

Stan, Kyle, and Cartman looked guiltily to the ground.

"Children please, I have to know," the nurse pleaded.

"He- he fell," Kyle said simply.

"He flew," Cartman corrected.

"_Flew_?"

"He- he was on the slide and jumped! He was tryin' to be a superhero," Stan stated.

The two women gasped before turning back to the little boy. The nurse turned him over and they all cried out- a trail of blood poured out of his hood and his eyes were rolled back in his head. Miss Claridge got up to call an ambulance. Meanwhile the nurse was having difficulty keeping all the other kids away.

"But we're his friends! We wanna know what happened," Kyle argued.

"Trust me children, you do not want to see him," the nurse warned.

Stan poked his head around her and his eyes went wide- Kenny motionless, blood pooling all around him. His stomach flip-flopped and he threw up.

"Told you he throws up at everything," Kyle shrugged.

An ambulance arrived ten minutes later. One of the men loading young Kenny onto a stretcher looked around.

"Can anyone tell us what happened here?" he asked.

"He jumped off the slide. I think he hit his head," Kyle pointed.

The paramedics looked at each other, shocked before racing off to Hell's Pass Hospital. Class ended early that day and their parents picked them up.

"They said there was an accident at school, what happened?" Sheila looked around wildly.

"Kenny hurt himself on the new playground," Kyle told her.

Their mothers gasped.

"How did he hurt himself?" Sharon looked worried.

"He jumped, trying to fly. He hit his head," Stan answered.

"Is it serious?" Sheila asked.

The boys all shrugged.

"I think so. He was taken to the hospidal in a van," Stan frowned.

"Oh no… I'm sure his parents are there now," Sharon sighed.

"Mom, can we go visit him?" Kyle asked his mother.

"Oh I don't know bubbe…"

"I wanna go home for lunch," Cartman crossed his arms angrily.

"It might make him feel better. He'd want the company, just like when I saw Stan when he got asthma weeks ago," Kyle looked up at her.

"You never visited Stan in the hospital bubbeleh, just at home. I don't think you'd want to see a friend in the hospital," Sheila corrected him.

"I do. We have to know what happened to him," Kyle insisted.

"It's just that- he might not look the same. He might be covered in bandaged or hooked up to machines or something. You might not even be allowed to see him," Sheila explained.

"Can we at least try?"

Sheila looked at the other mothers.

"I think it would be a good idea. At least we can get word on what happened," Liane said.

"Aww Mom!" Cartman whined.

"I think so too," Sharon agreed. "The poor dear. And his family might need the extra support."

"We're going to the hospidal?" Stan's eyes went wide.

"Just to visit your little friend Kenny," Sharon coaxed.

"I don't wanna go to the hospidal," Stan pouted.

"It's not for you honey, it's to visit Kenny."

Stan's stomach still bubbled with unease. All three families drove off to Hell's Pass Hospital to see if they could get word on what happened to the poor little boy. Sheila and Liane were able to cross the threshold of the hospital with their sons fine, but Sharon had to carry Stan in as he almost chocked her with his arms around her neck. They quickly located Mr. and Mrs. McCormick waiting by the doors of the emergency room.

"Oh Carol, we heard what happened," Sharon said sympathetically.

Carol sniffed. "Apparently he was just tryin' to fly or somethin'."

"I don't know where that boy would have thought it would be a good idea to jump off a slide," Stewart stated.

"Have you heard anything on his condition?" Sheila asked.

Carol dabbed at her eyes. "Not yet. We caught a glimpse of him 'fore he was taken in. He wasn't respondin' to nothing."

"Stan said he was bleedin' from the head, huh Stan?" Kyle looked up at his friend who was still clinging onto his mother.

"Mmmm…" was all Stan mumbled in his mom's hair.

"Oh Stewart," Carol gasped.

"Shhh… he'll be fine. I'm sure of it."

"How the hell do you know?" she snapped.

"He gets himself in all sorts of dangerous situations Carol. This is no different."

"I don't know…"

"Hey, if he didn't drown in the bathtub when you left him there when he was a baby for almost a half hour, he won't die now."

Sharon, Sheila, and Liane all shared a look, obviously thinking the same thing. They left their child alone in the bathtub? They decided to wait around for word on Kenny all afternoon. Cartman soon began to whine that he was hungry so Liane bought him a bag of chips and a soda from the vending machine to keep him happy. Stan however began to whine that he didn't want to be here. He _hated_ hospitals and no amount of distraction from Kyle could change that. Finally the doors opened and a doctor stepped out.

"Mr. and Mrs. Mc Cormick? Can I- speak with you in private?" he said.

With worried looks on their faces they followed the doctor to a small private room. He sighed as he took hold of Carol's hand.

"I am so sorry to be the one to tell you this but- your son, didn't make it."

"Wh- what do you mean he didn't make it?" Stuart's eyes went wide.

"Young Kenny sustained a massive head injury. His skull was fractured and a huge blood clot formed in his brain. We tried to prep him for surgery but his systems began to fail before we could do anything. We tried to revive him but it was too late, his heart had stopped and- we couldn't save him," he looked down.

Carol had tears in her eyes before she fell onto her husband. "Oh Kenny. Oh my little Kenny!"

"Oh god, oh god no!" Stuart exclaimed and wept with his wife.

The doctor allowed them to mourn before speaking up again. "If you have any questions"-

"Isn't- isn't there anything you can do?" Stuart cried.

"I'm sorry, he has already passed on. We already did all we could to revive him."

"Oh no. Oh how are we to live without our son?" Carol sobbed.

"There- there, there hon. He- he had a happy enough life. He- got himself in all sorts of trouble. It- it was just his time to go."

She hit him round the head. "You told me he'd pull through it you bastard!"

"How- how was I to know he would die?"

Together the two fought and cried at the same time. Meanwhile the doctor went over to where the mothers were with their children. He pulled them aside and whispered something.

"Oh no," Sharon's eyes filled with tears.

"Are you sure?" Sheila asked.

"Unfortunately. I- don't want to say anything in front of your children," the doctor nodded to the three boys.

"Thank-thank-you for telling us," Sharon sniffed.

"What is it Mommy?" Stan asked.

"I'll tell you when we're home sweetie. C'mon, we're going to go home."

"Finally!" Stan looked around frantically and immediately took hold of her hand and they drove home.

"What happened Mom?" Kyle frowned.

"I'll tell you later as well bubbe. C'mon."

Kyle and Cartman's mothers took them home, not speaking all the way there. Each mother took a different approach as to explain to their boys what happened. Stan could tell his mother was upset about something and it made him sad so he did not stop asking her what was wrong. She finally decided to tell him after she fed him a late lunch.

"You know Kenny was hurt very bad today, right sweetie?" she began.

"Yeah. He was bleedin'."

Sharon sighed as she took hold of his little hand. "He- he was really hurt. He was injured too much that- oh sweetie, Kenny died."

Stan looked at her blankly. "What does 'died' mean?"

Sharon sniffed at his innocence. "It means, Kenny won't be coming back. You- you won't get to see him again."

Stan gasped. "Oh no! Why? Was it something we done?"

"No, you didn't do anything. He was just too hurt that the doctors couldn't save him."

Stan frowned. "I thought doctors fixed people Mommy."

"Oh they do but- they can't fix everyone. You remember that toy car of yours you loved so much? The shiny red one with the cool wheels?"

"Shelley broked it," Stan glared.

"Yes, it was too broken to fix. Daddy tried to fix it but he couldn't. It's the same with Kenny; he was too broken for the doctors to fix."

Stan gasped. "They're gonna throw Kenny away in the dumpster?"

Sharon had to laugh. "No sweetie. I'll talk with you about it later."

"Mommy… am I gonna die?"

Sharon's eyes widened. "What? What makes you say that baby?"

Stan didn't look at her. "Well, Kenny was the same age as me. Maybe I'm gonna die soon too."

Sharon hugged him tight. "I don't think you're going to die anytime soon sweetie. I bet that you will grow up and live a very long, happy life."

"Are you sure?"

"Very sure sweetie."

He believed her but he was still a little skeptical.

Sheila avoided talking about what happened to Kenny however until it was time for bed. Kyle had to ask his mother then what had happened earlier.

"Oh Kyle, I don't think you want to hear…" she sighed.

"I have to. Kenny is our friend."

Sheila touched his plump cheek. "Bubbeleh, Kenny… you won't be seeing Kenny anymore."

"Why not? Oh no, we're in trouble huh? It wasn't my idea to have him jump off the slide!" Kyle exclaimed.

"No, nobody's in trouble bubbe. Kenny passed away."

"Huh?"

"The damage to his head was too great. They couldn't do anything to help him. That's why you won't see him again."

"Ever?"

"I'm sorry Kyle," Sheila said looking somber.

"I'm never going to play with Kenny again?"

She nodded. "Sometimes doctors can't always save people. Sometimes the damage is too big."

Kyle looked at her again. "So that's it? No more Kenny?"

"Yes Kyle."

"What are they going to do with him?"

"What do you mean?"

"With him? I mean, Kenny didn't disappear into the air did he?"

"I- well I don't know what they're going to do with him, that's his family's decision."

"Oh, okay."

Kyle didn't seem too upset; he was taking it all in more than anything. He didn't think they would never see him again. Parents exaggerated like that all the time. He felt hopeful so he didn't ask anymore questions when his mother tucked him in.

Eric Cartman however seemed to have forgotten about the scary incident earlier. He went around his house playing and eating like any normal day until Liane brought the subject up during dinner.

"Eric hon?"

"Huh?"

"Um, wouldn't you like to know what happened to your little friend earlier?" she prompted.

Cartman blinked. "Who?"

"Why Kenny poopsikins."

Cartman shoveled mashed potatoes into his mouth. "Okay."

"Well, well, Kenny… he died today honey."

"Died? What's that?"

"Well, it's when your heart stops beating and you stop breathing."

"Oh, you mean he has asthma?"

"What?"

"Well that's what happens to Stan and it's called asthma."

"Oh dear… no sweetums, it's not like that at all. Stanley has an illness but Kenny… Kenny has died. He won't be able to breathe, ever."

Cartman raised a brow. "You're just confusin' me now Mom."

"Kenny won't ever breathe again. And when you stop breathing, and don't get help, you die."

"Kenny had help Mom, _duh_," Cartman huffed. "He was taken to the hospital wasn't he?"

"Yes but"-

"So he had help. Stupid."

Liane bit her lip. Explaining death to her four-year-old was difficult.

"Well Eric honey, sometimes the help you receive, isn't very helpful. Sometimes doctors do all they can to help but in the end, the person still dies."

Cartman still looked confused. "So now what?"

"Well, well I don't know to tell you the truth."

"So Kenny died. What does that mean?"

"You won't be seeing him or playing with him again because he's unable to."

"Because he can't breathe?"

"Um, well, I guess so. He can't do anything. Breathe, move, speak. Because he's dead."

Cartman shrugged as he went back to his food. "Pff, sucks to be him then."

Liane gave up; maybe he would be able to understand the concept of death next year.

"Mom? Why do some kids not believe in Santa?" he suddenly asked.

"What?" she was surprised at this statement.

"Kyle said he doesn't know who Santa is."

"Oh. Hm… well, maybe his family doesn't celebrate Christmas hon."

"_What_? Why would someone not celebrate Christmas?" he demanded.

"A number of reasons I guess."

Cartman rubbed his chin. "Well I'm gonna find out why."

All of Miss Claridge's class missed the rest of the school week to pay their respects to their fallen classmate. Stan, Kyle, and Cartman did not know why it was such a big deal. Stan was thinking of Kenny's passing as that of a broken toy, Kyle still thought he would come back, and Cartman thought he just had some disease that enabled him to do anything. The next Monday was Kenny's funeral. Again, the boys didn't know what the big deal was. Randy was helping Stan into a little suit that morning he was going to be buried.

"Daddy, what are we doing?" he asked.

"Getting ready for Kenny's funeral son."

Stan looked at his father's hands as they tied a gray tie around his neck. "Are we going to church?"

"I- well, I guess you can say that," Randy said.

Stan groaned. "I hate goin' to church, it's so boring."

Randy stood up after he was finished. "This is going to be a little more serious today Stanley. It's not going to be like Sunday school."

Stan rolled his eyes. "You and Mom always say that. It's still boring."

Randy sighed as he placed a hand on his son's shoulder. "You're just too young to know. C'mon, let's go downstairs. Do you have the special gift for Kenny?"

Stan held up a little stuffed bear. "He's here."

Randy patted him on the back and minutes later left with his family to the church. Stan was surprised at all the people who had shown up at church that day. Especially since all of them were wearing black. It was odd enough to see his mom in a dark dress for church, much less every other female who stood around. He then spotted a boy in a green hat and a fat boy.

"Kyle! Cartman!" he ran to them.

"Hey Stan. Man, this is weird huh?" Kyle looked around.

"Yeah, I've never seen so many people in black before. I asked my mommy if we was going to an early Christmas service but she just cried."

"Yeah. I was just about to wear my Christmas sweater but my mom made me wear this," Cartman stuck up his nose at his black suit.

They watched as people filed in, all wearing black and looking very sad.

"Hey look! There's Miss Claridge!" Kyle suddenly pointed out. He was right, their preschool teacher had walked in wearing a formal dress and veil over his face, dabbing at her eyes.

"And Butters!" Stan saw. Butters heard Stan's voice and walked over.

"Oh uh, hey fellas."

"What are you doing here Butters?" Cartman sneered.

"Kenny died. I know we didn't play much or nonthin' but, he- he was still a swell guy," Butters struck his arm across to signify this.

"Gee, there sure are a lot of people sad that Kenny's dead," Kyle noticed.

"Yeah. I mean, when my favorite red car was too broken to fix I was the only one sad about it. But look," Stan told them.

"My mom said Kenny has a disease, and- and it's so bad, he won't be able to eat or breathe or play or nothin'," Cartman emphasized.

Stan looked around. "Good point. _Where_ is Kenny?"

They all turned their heads around now too. Kyle decided to answer.

"My parents told me he was going to come here in a box."

Cartman laughed out loud, getting glares from people walking by. "A _box_? I knew he was poor but a _box_?"

"Guess we have to be on the look out for a box then," Stan shrugged.

At that moment Sheila and Gerald came by.

"Come along Kyle, we have to get inside the church," Gerald said, hand on his boy's head.

"Where's the box Kenny is coming in?" Kyle asked curiously.

His parents shared a dark look.

"He's- he's inside the church Kyle," Gerald said with difficulty.

"What's a church?" Kyle asked as he followed after his parents. Cartman cracked up again.

"Come along Stanley, it's warmer inside," Sharon took hold of his hand.

"Ya! We can see Kenny!" he smiled.

"Oh cool!" Cartman ran inside before Liane had a chance to find him.

The boys sat in the front pews of the church where a small coffin lay ahead with flowers around it and a picture of Kenny on a stand. Stan noticed the crying inside louder now that everyone was in. He tugged on his mom's arm.

"Why is everyone sad Mommy?"

"Shhh," she pressed a finger to her lips.

"Is Kenny's broken body inside the box up there?"

"Shhh, yes honey."

At that moment Priest Maxi stepped to the alter. "Good morning fellow friends and family. It is my terrible duty today to send poor little Kenny McCormick's body to heaven."

Carol sobbed. "Oh Kenny! Not my Kenny!"

Stewart tried to comfort her. "Shhh darlin', it was his time to go."

The more Priest Maxi talked the more Kenny's family cried. Soon tears prickled Stan's eyes and he began to cry too. He wasn't exactly crying for his fallen friend but he hated seeing others in distress. Kyle looked to his left to see his best buddy crying on his mother's arm. That's when he began sniveling too. He didn't like to see Stan cry. Butters saw Kyle and Stan cry and had to start too. Cartman looked over to see all three boys in tears. It made him feel afraid that there really was something horrible to be upset over and soon, he joined them.

After Priest Maxi was finished and everyone cried for a bit longer they gathered everyone and everything to bury Kenny in the local cemetery. There the priest said more words before his body was finally lowered into the dirt. The boys threw their little trinkets into the grave before it was finally over.

"So we're never going to see Kenny again?" Kyle asked his mother.

"I already told you bubbeleh, no."

"So, that means… he's really gone," Stan said softly.

"We won't see him or play with him ever again," Kyle added.

"That sucks! He was the one who told us all those cool words. He was much cooler than _you_ dummies," Cartman kicked at the snow.

Stan blinked blue eyes in the cold air. "I can't believe it… oh my god… they- they killed him. They killed Kenny."

"Those bastards," Kyle added.

Stan sniffed and wiped his nose on his hand. "I'm gonna miss him."

They stared into the open grave that held their short-time friend. Their parents told them finally that it was time to go home. They did so with heavy hearts, now understanding they really wouldn't see Kenny ever again. It was the last day of preschool before Christmas break and the boys were looking forward to two weeks off, of course, they didn't really know how long two weeks was. They still missed their friend Kenny but with all the pretty lights, tress, decorations, sweets, and of course- presents, Stan and Cartman could barely hide their excitement. Kyle still didn't know what the big deal was; he never understood this Christmas thing. But on that final day as soon as their parents dropped them off Cartman came running to Stan and Kyle.

"I know it! I know it!" he gasped.

"Know how to loose weight?" Kyle guessed and he and Stan giggled.

"No smartasses, I know why Kyle doesn't believe in Santa!"

"Why?" Stan asked curious.

"'Cause he's a Jew!"

Stan looked confused. "What's a Jew?"

"They're evil people Stan. They're the ones who are responsible for Jesus' death!"

"What? That's stupid," Kyle glared.

"It's true, I asked my mom to look it up on the compooter last night and that's what she told me. They don't believe in Santa because they're evil Jews who killed Jesus," Cartman said in a final way.

Stan looked at his best friend. "Is that true Kyle?"

"_No_, nothing Cartman says is ever true."

"Then why don't you believe in Santa?"

Kyle growled. "We just don't okay? My family celebrates Hanukah instead."

Stan laughed at the silly name.

"So _Kyle_, gonna partitapate in the Christmas games today?" Cartman taunted.

"Shut-up!"

"You have to play the games Kyle, Miss Claridge said we're all gonna get a special prize! She said Santa left somethin' for all of us last night!" Stan said gleefully.

"Oh are you too smart and too much of a Jew to play games like normal people?" Cartman continued.

"Grrr!" Kyle shook in anger.

The whole day was spent playing holiday-themed games and Miss Claridge reading to the class a book called Frosty's Magic Stocking. Kyle didn't have the heart to tell anyone he didn't celebrate Christmas so he pretended to be in the know. It did look kind of fun, Stan and Cartman both enjoyed hopping around with antlers on their heads for the Reindeer Dance Game. At 12:30 class ended and Stan and Cartman rushed to their mothers to tell them all about what happened that day.

"We was reindeers Mommy! We was wearing horns," Stan smiled.

"And I won two games! I got _two_ candy canes!" Cartman held them up to show Liane, one that was already half gone.

"Santa left a present for all of us last night!" Stan held up a wrapped box in his mother's face.

"I wanna open mine noooooow," Cartman whined.

"On Christmas day sweetums," Liane told him.

Sheila had to go to the airport to pick up her mother so could not pick Kyle up from school. He'd be staying at Stan's until she got back. Sharon noticed Kyle's unusually quiet self.

"Did you have fun today too Kyle?" she smiled.

"Um… yeah."

Cartman just pointed and laughed.

"What was your favorite part?" Sharon asked.

"Um… the snowball throwin' contest," Kyle thought.

Sharon nudged Stan at that moment and whispered something in his ear. He blushed but nodded and reached into the car and handed over a gift to Cartman.

"Here you go Cartman…" he mumbled.

Liane smiled. "Oh would you look at that! What do you say to Stanley, Eric?"

Cartman grabbed the gift and shook it. "What is it?"

"Eric," Liane trailed.

He groaned. "_Thanks_ Stan."

"Actually, I made your family a little something too!" Liane reached into her car and handed over a huge platter of cookies.

"Cookies!" Stan screamed and immediately began to reach up for one.

"Thank-you Liane, I'm sure they won't last long," Sharon looked down at her son.

"Can I have one Mom? Can I? Can I? Can I?"

They shared a few more words before Sharon drove back home with Stan and Kyle in tow. Kyle was very happy when his mother showed up an hour later. He felt very out-of-place in the Marsh house for once. The pretty evergreen that stood decorated in the living room with some presents underneath, not to mention the other red, green, and glittery things. But he had to feel even guiltier before they left. Stan had handed over a small wrapped gift for him too.

"Merry Christmas Kyle," Stan beamed.

Sheila could tell her son felt horrible now. "What- what do you say Kyle?" she said uneasily.

"Thanks Stan…"

Sheila tried to cover up for her son. "I am so sorry we didn't get your family anything. I mean, the boys only just met three or four months ago…"

"Oh don't worry," Sharon waved a hand. "It's about giving, not receiving, isn't it Stanley?"

"_Now_ can I have a cookie Mom?" he begged.

They waved goodbye before shutting the door. It was very hard for the families to wait until Christmas. The only plus side to the wait was Sharon's birthday that happened on the sixteenth so Stan had one day having fun celebrating something. But Christmas… while it was difficult for little Stan and Cartman to sit by the Christmas tree and not open any gifts it was even harder for the McCormick family. Christmas was always a mix of excitement and sadness. The fact that Carol and Stewart couldn't line a tree of gifts for their sons was hard but they made the most of it. Now however, it would be tragic. With no little Kenny around anymore what was the point of celebrating? He was a miracle child yet had died before he even turned five. They didn't know what kind of sick game God was playing on them and they didn't appreciate it.

Christmas Eve came and after the town had their annual Christmas tree lighting ceremony, the boys got ready for bed. Cartman slept on the couch as usual, hoping to get a glimpse of Santa tonight. Meanwhile Stan had just had his fill of hot chocolate and a cookie and was carried off to bed by his parents. The snow drifted steadily around South Park, the town couldn't look any more festive. The sky was black when quite suddenly by Stark's Pond, the snow began to swirl. It went on like this in the same spot for a minute before something fell onto the earth. A boy in an orange hood. Kenny sat up and rubbed his eyes. What had happened? Where was he? He stood up on shaky legs.

"Hello?" he called to no answer.

The last thing he remembered was jumping off the tall slide at preschool. Now what? The noticed it was nighttime. Had a day really gone by? Shrugging, he thought it best to head home before he froze out here. Humming quite happily, he made his way to his little house, not knowing that it was Christmas Eve and not knowing that he had died. He found his way home, reached up to the doorknob and walked in. He saw his family sitting in the living room, asleep under a few blankets. He shook his mother's shoulder.

Carol opened her eyes into the dark and gasped at what she saw- the figure of her son in front of her!

"Ahhhh!" she screamed, waking Stewart and Kevin.

"What is it hon- oh sweet Jesus no!" Stewart yelped.

"What's wrong?" Kenny asked but no one heard him over the noise.

"You're dead! You're dead Kenny!" Carol pointed a frantic finger.

Kenny looked at himself. "No, I don't think so."

"You are son! We had a funeral for you and everything!" Stewart claimed.

Kenny looked confused. "I don't feel dead. I feel pretty solid. Aren't ghosts supposed to be like air?"

Kevin was brave enough to reach over and touch his brother. "He- he's solid all right Mom."

It too a little while to calm down but Carol finally reached over to see for herself if her son was really there. He was.

"Oh Stewart…"

Finally they broke down again and hugged him to them.

"Oh it's a miracle! A miracle!" praised Stewart.

"Oh, oh god has given us our own son back!"

Kenny wiggled himself out of his parents' arms. "What are you talkin' about?"

"Kenny… oh our Kenny… you died, you died two weeks ago," Carol noted.

Kenny stood still. "I what?"

"You did. You were dead and gone."

"I didn't die or I wouldn't be here."

"But you did die, you jumped off the slide at preschool yet here you are!" Carol insisted.

Kenny thought. "I ramember jumping off the slide. I was trying to be a superhero."

"You don't remember anything after that?" Stewart asked.

Kenny shook his head no.

"What a miracle! A Christmas miracle!" Carol cried again.

Kenny's eyes went wide. "It's Christmas?"

"Tomorrow son," Stewart said.

"And we was given the best gift of all. We got our son back," Carol hugged Kenny again.

Kenny still had no idea what was going on but was happy nonetheless to be back. Christmas day, after Stan and Cartman opened presents, their families met up to have fun by Stark's Pond. Stan didn't know why Kyle didn't want to come but tried to have fun with just Cartman around.

"Santa got _me_ a new sled!" Stan ranted to Cartman, showing him it.

"Pff, that's stupid. Santa got _me_ a scooter."

"No he didn't."

"Did too!"

"Then where is it?"

"_Dummy_, I can't ride a scooter in the snow," Cartman rolled his eyes at him.

Stan tightened the scarf over his neck. "I wonder why Kyle didn't come with us."

"I told you Stan, he's a Jew. Jews don't celebrate Christmas or have any fun."

"But… I gave him a present."

"He's not gonna like it 'cause he's a Jew."

"He's not? But he likes Thomas the Tank Engine…"

The two boys were too busy talking and playing to notice another boy walking their way. Only when he tapped Stan on his shoulder did they see him.

"Kenny!" they cried.

"Hey guys," he waved.

"What- how- I thought you were dead!" Stan pointed.

"My family said the same thing. Well, I'm not!"

"But my mom said you won't be able to breathe or eat or play anymore," Cartman looked suspicious.

"Yeah, my mom said you were broken. Did they finally fix you up then?" Stan looked at him up and down curiously.

"No. I just appeared in the snow last night. It's weird. I don't remember dying; I just remember jumping off the slide."

Cartman poked him before turning to Stan. "He's real dude."

Stan poked at him too. "Wow… that's so cool!"

"Yeah. I guess I didn't die after all!"

"Stanley, would you like to go get some- aahhhhh!" Sharon screamed, noticing who the boys were talking to.

"What is it Sharon? Oh god!" Randy gasped.

Even Shelley looked afraid and stood next to her parents.

"Look Mommy! Kenny didn't die after all!" Stan said happily.

It took a long time for their parents to calm down enough to have Kenny explain things. Most looked ready to faint. But finally, after a long discussion, they believed him.

"I don't believe this…" Sharon trailed.

"The doctors pronounced you dead Kenny," Randy shook his head.

"Well I came back!" he danced.

"Now I don't have to hang with just you and _Kyle_," Cartman smiled at Stan.

"Let's go an' show Kyle!" Stan jumped.

"Don't you want some lunch first sweetie?" Sharon asked her son.

"Please Mommy? He _has_ to know now."

She sighed. "All right… let's go."

Kyle blinked at the appearance of Stan and Cartman at his doorstep. "Um… thanks for the Thomas the Tank slippers Stan."

"Kyle, you'll never believe it! You'll never believe what happened today!" Stan gasped as if out of breath.

"It's _proof_ Santa exists!" Cartman said defiant.

"What?"

"Look who showed up while we was at Stark's Pond!" Stan and Cartman stepped back and reveled-

"_Kenny_?"

"He just showed up while we was playing. And he's real!" Stan said.

"Hey Kyle," Kenny waved.

"Wow… I can't believe it!" he then high-fived Stan. "Yes! I knew it! I _knew_ he wasn't gone for good! He's only four, he can't die already. Wow, this is so cool. We can go back to being four again! Minus Cartman," he added.

"Ay! At least I celebrate Christmas and know Santa exists and didn't kill Jesus, Jew," Cartman spat.

"We should all go back to Stark's Pond and play!" Stan tugged on his best friend's arm.

"Just a sec!" Kyle shut the door and came out minutes later, dressed.

"Where are you going Kyle?" Sheila asked.

"Playing with Kenny and everyone, bye!" he shut the door just as she cried, '_whatwhatwhat_?"

It was defiantly one of the best Christmas days of the boys' short lives. They forgot all about their new toys all day. Their friend had come back! Their parents lied, he hadn't died, he was alive and happy. Of course it did give them a warped sense of death over the next year or two, especially after the many other times Kenny had died since that fateful day in preschool. All the accidents he got himself into, he was defiantly in no way alive. Yet he came back, a smile on his face the next day. It was confusing but it made the boys happy to know their friend would always be there even if he did 'die.' From that day on, it all made sense as to why Kenny was indeed a miracle child. No matter how he died, he came back, ready for the next adventure.

_Sorry it took so long for a new segment in the boys as preschoolers. I was busy writing 'This is Your Life.' I hope you liked this, because again, it was a joy to write. Kenny's first death, Cartman finding out about Jews, Christmas…Don't forget to send in any ideas of your own and I'll see what I can do with them!_

_Love Rose: August 21, 2010_


	6. Then Came First Grade

**THEN CAME FIRST GRADE**

September 4th 2007. It was a big day, his mother and father had been telling him so for weeks. He didn't know why it was so huge, his parents made a big deal about the first day of preschool and an even bigger deal for kindergarten. What made the first day of first grade even more important than those other times? He already had been in school for almost two years; it was second nature by now.

"But _why_ is first grade so big?" Stan asked his mother for the tenth time the other night.

"Because, you are now going to be on the same schedule as Shelley honey," Sharon smiled.

"I thought I already was. We both wake up the same time."

"Not only will you both be going to school at the same time but I will be picking you up together as well."

Stan had blinked up at his mom. "I'm- going to be in school, for as long as Shelley?"

"Yes," Sharon smiled. "You're going to start school at 8:30 and end it at 3:00, just like Shelley. You're going to eat lunch in the same cafeteria and play on the same playground. You're truly going to be a big boy now!"

Stan's stomach contracted now. He was going to be in the same room for lunch and in the same play area for recess as Shelley? This was not going to be good.

"But Mom, I thought they sep'rated the big kids from the younger ones."

"What? Who told you that?"

"I dunno."

"They don't do that sweetie. Since you're in first grade and Shelley is in fifth, you will be able to see each other all day! You won't be in your own part of the building for recess or snack-time like you were in preschool and kindergarten. You're going to be with the big kids, isn't that exciting?" Sharon beamed.

Being in the same vacancy of his horrible big sister Shelley all day? Stan thought school meant he would be _away_ from her. No, this was not good at all. So that morning of his first day of school Stan had horrible butterflies in his stomach like no other. He looked down at the plate of French toast for him his mom had made. He could barely eat any of his special 'first official day of school' breakfast. He flinched when Shelley took a seat next to him and began to eat. Shelley glared at him.

"You better not embarrass me today _turd_," she spat.

"I won't," Stan squeaked.

"You better not think you can sit next to me during lunch."

"I know."

"You better not come up to me for anything during recess."

"Uh-huh."

"You better not expect me to walk you down the halls to the bathroom!" she continued.

"I promise!" Stan shook.

Shelley took hold of his pajama collar. "Because let me tell you now Stan, if you think I'm going to be nicer to you now that we're going to be around each other in school, you're dead wrong. If you go up to me or my friends we are all going to break your legs, got it?"

Stan nodded frantically. She let go and began to eat again. At that moment Sharon popped into the dining room and took a seat next to Randy and began to eat as well.

"Now Shelley, remember to help your brother out with anything he may need today okay?"

Shelley glared.

"If he can't reach the drinking fountain, help him up. If he gets lost, show him around. If he doesn't show up in the cafeteria after lunch begins, look down the halls for him. If he can't find the boys' bathroom, point it out. If he looks lonely during recess, play with him," Sharon explained.

"Remember, he's your responsibility now that he's in first grade," Randy added.

"What? He's going to have his stupid friends to help him out and play with him!" Shelley raged.

"They don't know anything about the 'big kid' part of school either Shelley. They won't be of much help," Sharon stated.

"I am not going to help him at all!"

"You are so young lady or you'll hear it from me!" Sharon snapped. "Stanley, if Shelley refuses to help you out, be sure to tell Mommy all right?"

Shelley glared at her little brother. Stan gulped. "'Kay," he squeaked.

Stan made sure to take an extra time getting dressed and brushing his teeth after breakfast. He felt as nervous for his first day of school as he did for his first day of preschool. Every time he heard a noise he jumped, thinking Shelley was behind him. He made sure his poofball hat fit snug on his head before finally going downstairs. Sharon was beaming at him when he came down. She handed over a Spongebob lunchbox.

"I made a special lunch of your favorite things today sweetie, and I packed in a special treat."

"'Kay," he said quietly again.

She put it inside his new red backpack where a baseball, football, basketball, and soccer ball were stitched on the front.

"I made sure you have everything packed in Stan. You're all set to go!"

Stan groaned. No he wasn't, he didn't feel like it. Shelley came down minutes later, glaring all the while.

"Have a good first day of school kids!" Randy smiled. "Be sure to tell me all about first grade all right son?"

Stan could only nod. He went into the car without another word and Sharon drove off to South Park Elementary. Stan looked out the car window. He had been going here for two years now, so why did it feel as if he was seeing this place for the first time? All too soon he had to leave the comfort of the family car. Sharon gave him a big kiss before turning to her daughter.

"You better look after him today Shelley. He has Mrs. Hillgry, just like you did, so you should remember where her room is. It's number 12 so you wait outside it every time the bell rings to show him around, understand?"

"She- she doesn't have to Mom," Stan told her, afraid that Shelley would cream him if she did.

Sharon only smiled at her son. "I know you might think it's embarrassing but it's best that she does. You're going to have full access to the school now Stan and I want to make sure you can get about without a problem. Meet me right here after school okay you two?" With one final smile she drove off.

As soon as their mother was out of sight Shelley turned to Stan. "So help me if you think I'm going to baby you all day Stan."

"But Mom said"-

"I don't care what she says, if you try coming to me for anything you are going to pay!" she slapped his face and went into the school without him.

"Shelley! Wait! I don't know… where my room is," he trailed.

"Stan! Hey Stan!" called a voice. He turned around to see Cartman waddling over.

"Oh, hey dude."

"Dude, there you are. My mom just dropped me off. Stupid woman, does she really think I know my way to our room?" he scoffed.

"Yeah. Shelley had our teacher when she was in first grade but doesn't wanna show me around either."

"Well she's a bitch."

"True."

"Stan!" Stan saw Kyle running to him with Kenny behind. "Hey, there you are."

"You have Mrs. Hillgry too?" Stan asked.

"'Course I do, I told you before. We all have her right?"

They all nodded.

"Do you know where the room is?" Kyle asked.

"No. my sister was no _help_," Stan crossed his arms. "She had her when she was in first grade but she's not gonna show me the way!"

"Do you even know what floor it's on?"

"Has to be the first. All the older kids have the second floor," Stan answered.

"Well maybe we should start looking before we're late," Kyle suggested.

"Bet ya can't wait to show off your stupid Jew brain to the teacher huh _Jew_?" Cartman teased.

"Shut-up fatass!"

"Ha, haaaa, look at them, they think they're so big," chuckled an older student as he and his friend passed by.

His friend laughed too. "Huh, yeah. Think they're so tough and cool, cursin'."

"You babies have a lot to learn," the first one said before he and his friend walked off laughing the whole way.

Stan felt his cheeks burn. "C'mon you guys, let's just find room twelve…"

Luckily for them it didn't take long to find it. They walked into the building and instead of turning down the first hallway to the left like they did for preschool and kindergarten they took a hallway on the right and quickly found where all the first and second grade classrooms were and number twelve, Mrs. Hillgry's room. Luckily for them they weren't the only nervous-looking students. A crowd of their other classmates stood around the room as they waited for their teacher to arrive. Butters stood there rubbing his hands together, trying to ignore the laughter coming from behind him as a second-grader pointed at his Fluffy Bear backpack. Finally there was relief. A woman with wavy red-brown hair dressed in a brown pencil skirt and white blouse walked over to them, a pretty smile on her face.

"Is this my new class for the year?" she asked.

There was a murmur of response. She unlocked her door with a key and the kids walked in. They gasped- it didn't look anything like kindergarten. There were twenty or so desks sitting there waiting for them, just like the big kids used. No more group projects around a circular table for them. They also noticed a lack of toys in the room as well.

"No Buddy the helper Dog?" Butters asked sadly as he looked around.

"Okay students, I have all made you special nametags so find the desk that holds your name and take a seat," Mrs. Hillgry explained. They all rummaged around and did so, Cartman pushing his way as usual. Stan found a desk in the second row that had 'STANLEY' written on it in fun letters. He took a seat. He then saw Kyle take a seat in the front row off to the other side of where he was. Stan immediately got up and ran to him.

"Kyle! What are you doing?" he asked.

"My name's up here- see?"

"But I'm in the second row."

"I wonder why…"

"Maybe the teacher doesn't know we're best friends."

"Move along kids, hurry," Mrs. Hillgry informed.

Sadly Stan went back to his designated seat, not happy since he had to sit next to Cartman. He set his backpack over his chair and looked down. He felt someone take the seat next to him. A few seconds later he heard a little girl's voice.

"Stan? Is that you?"

Stan turned to his right to see a girl sitting there with long black hair, a purple hat and a purple outfit. She was smiling. She was also very pretty.

"Stan?"

"H-huh?"

"It is you!" she squealed. "I recognize your eyes and your hat. It's me Stan, Wendy- Wendy Testaburger from preschool."

"W-who?"

She giggled. "We had preschool together, Ms. Claridge remember? But then you had Mrs. Burnum for kindergarten and I had Mrs. Kay. I was a bit upset we didn't get the same teacher, I liked you in preschool. But now we have the same first grade teacher! Isn't that great?" she explained.

Stan licked dry lips. "Y-yeah. Good to see ya again Wendy."

She chuckled again. "You're cute Stan. You remind me of my bunny, Boonie. You're both cute with black hair."

Stan was hardly listening to her; he was too into her appearance. She had such nice thick hair, bright brownish eyes, and a sweet smile. She also wore a hat like he did. Yes, he remembered Wendy Testaburger now. How could he not? His mind was interrupted when Mrs. Hillgry began roll call. She paused when she saw Stan's name.

"Stanley Marsh?"

He raised a hand meekly.

Mrs. Hillgry smiled. "Oh _Marsh_, I knew I recognized that name somewhere. You have an older sister, Shelley, don't you?"

"Ah-huh," he nodded.

"I had her in my class some years ago. She must be in what? Fifth grade now?"

Stan only nodded.

"So you must be the little brother she would always bring up! Well I am happy to have you sweetie, I am sure we will be good friends!" she returned to her list. "Alison Miller?"

Humiliated at being called out, Stan had his face meet his desk. Cartman poked him.

"Ha-haaaa!"

"Shut-up Eric! You are so mean!" Wendy shot. "Don't worry Stan, I think it's great you already know the teacher." She put a hand on his shoulder and that's when it happened- Stan's French toast ended up on Wendy and the space between them. There were several cries of 'gross!' and laughter soon broke out. Stan looked up with tears in his eyes at his classmates.

"Oh my goodness! Stanley! Are you okay?" gasped their teacher.

Everyone was still laughing at him. He had thrown up several times while in preschool and kindergarten but this was different, nobody ever really laughed at him before for doing it. He sniffed and shook his head.

"Oh dear… does anyone know how to get to the nurse's office?"

One of the kids stood. "I do, my older sister showed me around already," spoke a little boy.

"All right, could you please take Stanley there Mark?"

Stan felt horrible, absolutely horrible. He was being led to the nurse's office by some kid who had an older sister as well but had showed him around. And of course he had thrown up on the pretty girl who was sitting next to him. Stan stayed in the nurse's office for an hour or so before feeling like it was finally time to face Mrs. Hillgry's class again. He poked his head in and saw the teacher and the students engaged in some sort of game. They were all sitting on their desks and one of the girls had a ball in her hand.

"Oh, welcome back Stanley. Are you feeling better?" asked Mrs. Hillgry.

"Yeah…"

"Well take a seat on your desk. We're playing a game right now. If you have possession of the ball you tell the class something about yourself. Then you toss it to another kid in class and they say something about themselves."

Stan climbed onto his desk.

"Okay Heidi, tell us something about yourself," smiled the teacher to the girl with strawberry blonde hair.

"Um… my favorite color is pink."

"Toss it to someone else now."

Wendy was the one who caught it. "I have a black and white bunny named Boonie." She tossed it to Stan who almost dropped it. Cartman laughed.

"Stanley?" Mrs. Hillgry inquired.

He licked dry lips; he could feel Wendy's eyes on him. "Um, I- I- I"-

"Am a wuss!" finished Cartman and a few other kids laughed.

"Eric!" snapped their teacher. "Go ahead Stanley."

"Um, I like animals…"

"Good! Throw it to someone else now."

Stan threw the ball hard over to Cartman, it almost hit him in the nose.

"Hey you idiot!" he cried.

"Eric!" the teacher said again.

It was finally time for recess. Stan couldn't wait to get away from Wendy, he did not know why he was feeling the way he was about her. He just wanted to focus on the big kid play ground now. But that was sadly not going to happen; too many others were running about and it was difficult for all the first graders to get a chance to do anything without being shoved by older kids. He just stood around by a tree with Kyle, Cartman, and Kenny.

"So what do you guys think of first grade so far?" he asked.

"It's cool I guess," Kyle shrugged. "I hope we can get to some learning soon though."

"No way, I wanna play _all_ day. We don't need to learn nothin' else," Cartman passed off.

"What about you Stan?"

"Well…"

"Oh he loves it because he loves Wendy!" Cartman teased.

"What? I do not!"

"You've been staring at her all day. You sat like an idiot when she threw you the ball."

"So? I do not like Wendy! She's a girl and girls are _stupid_."

"Yeah, girls are so stupid. Nothing but bitches," Cartman agreed.

But deep inside Stan couldn't hide it, Wendy was not stupid. She spoke very well for someone her age and her hair… he loved her hair and pretty face. She was beautiful. Maybe she was going to be the one he married. His parents after all were around his age when they met. The four boys were standing around under the tree talking when three girls walked their way. They giggled but the one in the middle, Wendy, quieted the one on her right. She walked over and tapped Stan on his shoulder. He jumped. The girls laughed some more.

"Staaaan," Wendy began. "I just want to say that I don't hate you or anything."

He gulped.

"For what happened this morning. It was pretty gross you threw-up on me but I remember you doing stuff like that in preschool so it's okay."

He swallowed again.

"Anyway, me and Bebe and Heidi just wanted to know if you guys wanted to go on the swings with us."

"Pff, yeah right, girls have cooties!" Cartman said, arms crossed.

Bebe gasped. "We do not!"

"Yeah _huh_, it's a big secret you like to keep but it's not a secret no more. I know that if we play with you you're gonna give us cooties," Cartman went on.

"What's cooties?" Stan asked.

"It's only the most biggest disease girls can give boys dumbass!" Cartman told him.

"Really?" Stan gasped.

"Yeah. And there's no cure, once you have it you die."

"You don't die," Kyle stepped in. "There's a way to stop from getting cooties."

"How?" Stan asked.

"The only way to not get cooties is to get a cootie shot," Kyle told his best friend.

"No! I don't like shots!" Stan said fearfully.

"You boys are so stupid," Bebe had her hands on her hips.

"Are you sure you don't wanna come with me Stan?" Wendy asked sweetly.

Stan looked at her and it happened again- he barfed. All in all it had been a pretty bad first day of school for Stanley and was only more than happy to meet up with his mother who, surprisingly, met up with him instead by Mrs. Hillgry's class after the bell had rung to see the teacher after so many years.

"Oh your son is such a cutie!" Mrs. Hillgry exclaimed.

Sharon smiled with a hand on Stan's head. "Yes, he is isn't he?"

"He's so polite. Say Mrs. Marsh, how has Shelley been?"

"Oh well, ever since Stan was born she's been a bit jealous but- it gets better as the years go by."

Stan rolled his eyes, if anything, it got worse.

"I'm sure she would love to say hello to you again but she insisted she had to talk with a friend," Sharon explained.

No way was Shelley going to be embarrassed as her old first grade teacher reminisced about her and told her how much she already loved her little brother. After a few more moments they said their good-byes and Sharon and Stan met up with Shelley by the car.

"I thought you were talking to Krissa Shelley," Sharon noted, the absence of her friend.

"Pff, like I wanted to say hi to Mrs. Hillgry with you all there?"

Sharon sighed. Once her kids where in the car she turned around to face them. "How was your first day kids?"

"Bad," Stan said looking down.

"Oh no, how come baby?"

"I got lost on the way back from lunch," Stan said.

"Shelley you were supposed to be watching your bother!" Sharon snapped.

Shelley rolled her eyes.

"And- and on the way to second recess, anofer big kid stepped on my foot. Then I couldn't get the wrapper open on my pudding cup. And guess what Mommy? Kyle doesn't sit next to me!" Stan gasped.

"What's that?"

"He sits up front and I'm in the second row! We all have 'signed seats! And I have to sit next to Cartman," Stan crossed his arms, clearly upset.

"I'm sorry sweetie."

"And- and- I threw up- twice!"

"Twice? Your teacher told me you only did it when class started."

"Oh, well also during recess but I didn't tell her."

"Why did you throw up twice Stanley?" Sharon asked, concerned.

He shrugged, he honestly didn't know. He threw-up all the time but he didn't know why he did so today. There was nothing sickening going on, he wasn't spinning around in a chair, wasn't up high, didn't see blood or a nasty-looking twisted arm, he didn't feel ill, or was afraid or nervous of something. At least he didn't think so. So what had happened?

"I'm sure I cooked your breakfast thoroughly," Sharon was saying.

"I dunno Mommy."

All he knew was the next day had to be better, and by breakfast it had certainly started out that way. As the family ate his mother was telling Shelley to look out for him in a more threatening manner.

"I mean it young lady, you will be watching him today or you will be grounded from something."

"He'll be fine Mom!" Shelley protested.

"He was lost after lunch yesterday! And an older kid stepped on him. You _will_ be waiting outside his door every time the bell rings and you _will_ sit near him during lunch. And you _will_ make sure no one else teases him or hurts him," Sharon was pointing a finger at her daughter.

This was going to be both a blessing and a curse for Stan. But he had other things on his mind; he had to convince his teacher to let him sit by Kyle and had to figure out why Wendy made him feel so nervous. That morning Stan bravely walked up to Mrs. Hillgry, Kyle with him.

"Um, Missus Hillagry?" Stan said shyly.

"It's Hillgry sweetie. Yes?"

"Um…"

Stan and Kyle looked at each other.

"Um… why does Kyle sit up front and I sit in the second row?"

"Oh, well that's just how I seated everyone Stanley. I did it randomly. Do you know what random means?"

"For no real order or reason," Kyle answered.

"Yes, good job Kyle. You see Stan, there's no reason why you sit there, but you just do. It's a good way to get to know your neighbors."

"But I already know my neighbors. I'm already friends with Cartman and- and Wendy…" Stan gulped.

"Well what do you want me to do about it?"

"Can I sit up front with Kyle too Mrs. Hillagry?"

"Yeah, Stan and I are best friends," Kyle added, arm around the boy in the blue and red hat.

Mrs. Hillgry sighed. "I'm sorry boys but no. If I allowed you to sit together than everyone else will want to sit wherever they wanted to. Sometimes you can't sit wherever you want to boys."

"Why not?" they said together.

"Well, for example, as you get older you will be known a lot by your last name. Kyle's name starts with a B but yours starts with an M, Stan. That is eleven letters away, that's pretty far isn't it?"

"But we're best friends!"

"I'm sorry you two. You can sit together plenty of times during lunch and recess and lining up when we walk to the library or computer room but not in class, all right?"

It was defiantly a pretty huge bomb in their eyes. They sat together all the time during preschool and kindergarten. How would they be able to focus in school if they were a row of desks apart?

"Can I at least move from Cartman?" Stan asked.

"I'm sorry sweetie but no."

An even bigger bomb. The bell rang and it was soon time for class. Cartman shoved Stan forward in his chair as he made his way to the desk on his left. Wendy took her seat on Stan's right. She smiled at him.

"Hiiii Stan."

He gulped. "H-hi."

"Are you feeling better today?"

"Huh?"

"You threw-up _twice_ yesterday."

"Oh, uh, I think…" although the butterflies in his stomach told a different story.

"Well if you're feeling sick again I'm right here," she smiled again and took hold of his hand briefly, but it was enough for him to loose his breakfast on her again. Mrs. Hillgry asked another student to escort Stan to the nurse's that morning for he felt just as humiliated as he did the day before. His second day of first grade was hardly any better than his first. After each time the bell rang Shelley was waiting for him by the door, angry written all over her face. Stan told her she didn't have to take him anywhere but she didn't buy it.

"Yeah right, as soon as Mom picks us up you're going to go on and on about how I abandoned you everywhere, just to get me in trouble!" she spat.

During lunch he also had a run-in with his terror of a sister. He couldn't take off the cover from his applesauce and had to go over to the table that was across from his to ask for help. Shelley had already been giving him deathly glares the whole day if he even so much as looked at her.

"Didn't I tell you not to embarrass me in front of everyone?" she told him.

"But Mom said"-

She took off his applesauce cover before shoving it into him without another word. How he hoped the next day would be better. No such luck. As soon as Wendy took her seat next to him she had to look him in the eye again.

"This time, if you have to throw-up, don't do it on me okay?"

All it took was one touch on his shoulder for him to loose his Corn Pops. It alarmed Mrs. Hillgry for the third time and once again she asked him if he needed to see the nurse. Once again the other students were laughing at him so once again Stan took up the offer. Kyle volunteered to take him this time.

"Dude, you have to stop throwing up all the time," Kyle told him as they waited around the nurse's office.

"It's not my fault! I do it all the time, why does it matter now?" Stan frowned.

"Well… 'cause we're in first grade now. Everyone is only going to start making fun of you for it. And Mrs. Hillgry is going to start to worry."

"I don't know why I keep doin' it but I do," Stan admitted.

The nurse, Mrs. Alders sighed as she spotted the same little boy with a poof ball hat in her office.

"Did you get sick in class a third time Stanley?"

"Yes…" he looked at his feet.

Kyle decided to leave for he knew his friend was in good hands. The nurse checked him over but as much as Stan protested he'd be fine the rest of the day, she phoned his mother and Sharon took Stan out of school the rest of the day. He felt horrible as he stayed in bed all day, trying to explain to Sharon he wasn't sick and just wanted to go back to school.

"You vomit so easily Stanley, we all know that. But you have never done so three days in a row. I'm worried," Sharon explained.

"It was just a mitake Mom, I'm really fine," Stan told her.

"If you do it again tomorrow I'm going to have to schedule an appointment with the doctor."

"_Really_ Mom, I don't need to go to the doctor."

She hummed.

"I don't know why I thrown-up so much but I'm not sick. I don't know why I did it."

"Or why you do so as soon as class starts?"

Stan thought as he swung his feet. "Mommy… how do you know if you're gonna marry somebody?"

"What?" she was taken aback at his question.

"See, there's a girl who sits next to me. I dunno what it is but I think she might be the one."

Sharon couldn't help but giggle. "Oh really?"

"She makes me feel like I never have before! She's so pretty. I think she might be why I throw-up."

"Well sweetie, you don't throw-up because you like somebody. Then again…" it didn't take much to trigger Stan's stomach contents to come up.

"Her name is Wendy. She was from preschool but got a diff'rent teacher for kindergarten so I never really saw her after. But she sits next to me in class now. I think she's the one," he said calmly.

"Well… hm… and you think she's the reason you've been getting sick?"

"She has to be, I've only been throwing up when she touches me."

"Touches you?" Sharon repeated.

"Yeah, she holds my hand or puts a hand on my shoulder."

"Oh thank goodness," Sharon sighed in relief, thinking of something else.

"What can I do about it Mom? I don't wanna keep throwing up. It's embracingly."

"Surely it's not that embarrassing sweetie…"

"All the kids laugh. I bet you- I bet tomorrow, they're going to come up with a nickname for me or something. Then during recess they're going to spend all the time calling me it. I don't want to be known as the kid who always throws up," Stan said sadly.

"Well what do you think you should do about it?" Sharon asked.

Stan thought. "What can I do?"

Sharon placed her son on her lap. "Well, how about this: I could make you a smoothie or breakfast shake tomorrow so in case you do vomit, it won't be as sick to look at. Or you can try to hold it in, and if you feel you need to, excuse yourself to the bathroom."

"That's not going to work Mom," Stan moaned.

Sharon felt helpless, he was right; it was just too easy for Stan to vomit. They had already tried all they could the past five years to stop it from happening but to no avail. An idea popped in Sharon's mind.

"I know sweetie! How about I call Wendy's mother and see if you can come over for a play date? Wouldn't that be fun?"

"_What_?" Stan gasped.

"Maybe all you need to do is hang around her for a little while and you'll get used to being around her, then your feelings might go away. You can become friends and won't have to worry about loosing your lunch on her anymore."

"Mom, she's a girl," Stan stated bluntly.

"Well what's wrong with that?"

"She's a _girl_. Boys don't play with girls," he crossed his arms, defiant.

"They do so. Your father and I were friends in elementary school for years," Sharon stated.

"But it's gonna be _boring_. She's going to want to play Princess or with Barbies. She won't have cars in her toy box or fake swords."

"Well I think playing with a girl is just what you need Stanley. I'm going to get a hold of Wendy's mother. You will have a great time." Sharon stood up and left the room.

Stan groaned as he sank onto his race car bed. Great, he had a play date with a girl. He was going to be ripped on for sure now.

_Since this is already long enough, I decided it will be in two parts. So come back soon for part two of Stan's dilemma with Wendy! Please review, thanks!_

_Magical love: Rose, September 17, 2010_


	7. Girls and Boys are Complicted

**GIRLS/BOYS ARE COMPLICATED**

It was thankfully Friday and that meant Stan could have a break from school for once. Although it meant having to endure Wendy for six hours before he had the freedom. As she did the other three days, Wendy smiled upon taking his seat next to her.

"Hello Stan!" she said happily.

He gulped. "I- I don't want to throw-up on you no more Wendy so I'm not gonna talk to you anymore."

"What?"

Stan turned his head away.

"Stan…"

He ignored her.

"Stan, I can't be the reason why you get sick," she told him.

"But just in case. Maybe we can talk anofer time."

"Aw, did you and Wendy break up?" Cartman commented.

"Shut-up!" Stan screamed.

Much to Stan's surprise ignoring Wendy seemed to help. He paid attention to what Mrs. Hillgry was saying and his only distraction was Cartman sitting next to him. In fact, the whole day was a lot better than it had been all week. He had a successful lunch without having to go over to Shelley to ask how to open things and made it all the way back to his classroom after recess without help. He happily met up with his mother after school had ended.

"I had a good day today Mom!" Stan beamed.

"You did? That's wonderful!" Sharon exclaimed.

"I didn't get lost or have troubles at all. And I didn't throw up."

"I'm so happy for you sweetie. Now you go wait right here with Shelley okay?"

"Where are you going?"

"I'm going to talk with Wendy's mother."

"What? No!" Stan gasped. "No! No Mom please!"

"What is the matter with you?" Sharon looked down at her son.

"Mom, _please_ don't make me play with Wendy, everyone's gonna laugh!"

"No they are not," Sharon said firmly.

"Mommy, _please_…" Stan hung onto her pants leg.

With difficulty, Sharon unlocked his small fingers and went over to find Mrs. Testaburger. Stan stood, looking after his mother with Shelley looming over him. She thankfully didn't say or do anything to him but that didn't matter, his mother was scheduling a play date at a girl's house! Ten minutes later Sharon came by with a large smile on her face.

"Guess what Stanley?"

"I don't have to play with Wendy?" he hoped.

"I just spoke with Wendy's mother and she agreed that it would be a great idea if you and her daughter had a play date! You're going over to her house tomorrow afternoon and are going to have so much fun!"

"Aw-awww!" Stan moaned. "You promised me you'd take me to the park!"

"I can take you to the park Sunday, Stanley."

"Moooooommmm!"

Sharon just shook him off and led her kids into the car. Saturday was not going to be any fun now that he was forced to play with a girl. And not just any girl, a girl he thought was pretty! He was truly doomed now. Saturday came with much dread on Stan's part. He was so embarrassed to be spending time with Wendy today instead of a fun day at the park with his family. Sharon poked her head into Stan's room after he was finished getting dressed.

"Wendy's mother said you can bring over any toys that you want," Sharon said in an upbeat manner.

"She won't like any of my toys," Stan said stubbornly.

"You don't know that. Not everything you own has to be a 'boys only' toy. Let's look in your toy box."

Stan watched as his mother shifted through some play things before pulling one out. "What about your Woody doll?"

"No, not even Kyle gets to play with Woody," Stan snatched it right back from her hands.

"Okay… oh what about your bucket of army men?"

"No!"

"Well what about Silly Putty?"

"No!" he frowned again.

Sharon sighed. "Your Robo-Dog?"

"_No_!" he put it back in his box again.

"What about your green train?"

"It's for boys, not for girls," Stan said sounding smug.

Sharon dropped the toy box and went to look in his closet. "A Frisbee?"

"Not that."

"What on earth is wrong with throwing a Frisbee around Stanley?" Sharon put her hands on her hips.

"'Cause… 'cause I don't want her to touch it."

Sharon spotted something else. "Oh look! Your Police Officer dress up set! You can take turns pretending to be a police officer Stanley. You can also bring over that police car you love so much!"

"I don't want to," Stan said immediately.

Sharon frowned. "Well this is getting ridiculous Stan; there is no reason to not bring that over. A girl can have just as much fun playing cops as you do. You love playing with your police officer set."

"It's too special of a toy…" Stan trailed.

"Well I don't want to have to think of everything Stanley. You are going to bring a few things over; it's not fair if only Wendy has to share her toys."

Stan just blinked up at his mother.

"You are bringing over three things; if you don't pick three things out I'm doing it for you. Go on, what's the first thing?"

Stan sighed but walked over to a pile of stuffed animals on the floor. "Rocky," he said softly, pulling out a stuffed purple raccoon.

"Good, what else?"

"This…" he chose a toy space gun from his toy box that made different sounds and flashing lights.

"One more thing. How about a game?"

Stan looked at the games on a shelf in the basement. "Candy Land!" he made his first real smile as he pulled it off the shelf.

"Good! Was that so hard?"

Sure he was still embarrassed about playing with a girl but with three special play things of his, it had to be a bit more fun. He even decided to bring over Mike the monkey whom he said was Rocky's best friend. Around lunch Sharon drove to Wendy Testaburger's house. Stan stood on the doorstep shyly as Wendy's mother introduced herself.

"You two will have a fun day today," she was saying. "Wendy is looking forward to playing with you Stanley!"

"Don't be surprised if he throws up," Sharon whispered in the other mother's ear.

"Oh, okay."

Sharon kissed her son's cheek. "Good-bye honey, have a fun time. I'll be back in a few hours okay?" with that she waved good-bye and drove off.

"Well come on in Stanley," Mrs. Testaburger stepped aside and he walked in.

"You can put your toys in the play room. Wendy! Wendy dear, Stanley is here!" Mrs. Testaburger called from the foot of the stairs.

Wendy hurried down the stairs with a large smile on her face. "Hi Stan!"

He gulped. "Hi Wendy."

"I'm so happy you're here! We're going to have so much fun today!"

"Why don't you show Stanley around Wendy while I fix up lunch?"

"First of all, let's go to the play room where you can put your toys Stan." Wendy ran back up the stairs, Stan close behind. She led him to a loft area at the base of the second floor. "What did you bring?" she asked, interested.

"Um… Candy Land, a Super Sonic Space Gun, Rocky, and Mike," Stan showed her.

"Wow, you have a purple raccoon? That is so neat!" Wendy took the raccoon from him.

"You think so?"

"Yeah, I love purple!" she hugged it. "Oh, let me show you my room." She took hold of his hand and he fought the bile rising in his throat as she led him away. They stepped inside what could only be described as a little girl's room. The walls were painted a shade of lavender and there were Disney Princess themed covers on her bed with fluffy pink and purple pillows. In the corner of the wall above her bed was a canopy with stuffed animals on it. A tall dollhouse stood at the foot of the bed and a white dresser drawer had glittery stickers over it. On the other side of her room was another tall white cabinet filled with books, little castle and princess figurines and a picture of Wendy with and older woman Stan figured to be her grandmother in a butterfly frame. Also on her walls was a poster from the Little Mermaid and Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs. All in all, Stan felt very out of his element.

"I don't have many toys in here, they're all in the play room," Wendy was explaining. "So, what do you think of my room Stan?"

He licked his lips. "Um, it's cool I guess…"

"Have you ever been inside a girl's room Stan?" she asked.

"Um, my sister's a few times. But if she ever finds me in her room she hurts me," Stan told her.

"Oh."

Stan bit his lip, not knowing what to say. That's when something popped in his head. "Hey, didn't you say you had a bunny?"

"I do! Let me show you him!" she smiled and had him follow her downstairs into the living room where a cage sat on the floor and inside was a black and white bunny with pointy ears nibbling on some feed. Wendy unlatched the cage and took the animal out. "His name is Boonie. I got him last Christmas."

Stan gently stroked the rabbit's soft ears for a moment before asking, "Can I hold him?"

Wendy looked unsure. "I don't know… he only knows me."

"Oh. Okay." Stan looked down.

Wendy felt bad for him so she said, "Weeeellll… if you're really careful with him…"

Stan held out his arms as she placed Boonie inside them. The creature sniffed around but did not hop away. Stan giggled as he tickled his ear with his whiskers. At that moment Mrs. Testaburger gasped.

"Oh Stanley, be careful with him!"

"It's fine Mom, look"- Wendy pointed out how calm Boonie was in his arms.

Mrs. Testaburger smiled. "Oh, would you look at that, he likes you."

"Yeah," Stan grinned.

"Wow, you are just a natural around animals aren't you Stanley?"

"Maybe."

Mrs. Testaburger made sure the kids washed their hands before eating lunch. Stan could hardly eat his chicken noodle soup and crackers, Wendy looked so pretty as she ate. She would occasionally look at him and smile but focused on her food more. Stan took a long sip from his fruit punch to have something to do.

"Are you hungry Stanley?" her mother asked, ten minutes later.

"Huh? Oh, uh, not really…"

"Well do try to eat something, I generally don't allow snacks until lunch is finished."

Stan slurred some more soup and was allowed to have jello after.

"I love jello, do you?" Wendy asked him.

"Yeah."

"It's so fun to play with. I love how wiggly it is. I love making shapes out of them with cookie cutters."

Stan just nodded.

"What's your favorite jello flavor?"

"Red," Stan answered.

She giggled. "Red's a _color_ Stan."

"Oh," he felt his face grow hot.

"I like grape. I like grape anything."

After their snack Wendy led him upstairs where they would finally be able to play. Stan sat on the carpet and looked around.

"What do you wanna play Stan?" she asked.

"I dunno…"

"I have a huge tub of Barbies!" Wendy pulled out a large white tub with the dolls from a bottom shelf in the play room.

"No thanks," he said quickly.

"I know! How 'bout we pretend we're Snow White and you're the Prince from Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs?" she said excitedly.

"No."

"Okay… how about I'm Jasmine and you're Aladdin and you save me from Jafar"-

"_No_," he said firmly again.

"It would be perfect Stan! We both have black hair like they do."

"I don't play prince and princess stuff," Stan told her.

"Oh. What do you like to play then?"

Stan wanted to answer police man but he remembered he didn't bring over his police set. Why didn't his mom tell him to bring it? He licked his lips.

"I like to play Space Rangers."

"What's that?" Wendy sat across from him, legs crossed Indian style.

"Um, you're a Space Ranger who um, is flying in space and finds new planets. Then you inveta-gate it and try to survive all the monsters that might be on the new planet," Stan explained.

Wendy stared at him blankly. "Um, what else do you like to play?"

"Football. And baseball. I like riding my bike, but I didn't bring it."

Wendy stood up. "How about this: we write three things on paper and put it in a hat and choose one. Whatever we pick we have to play okay?"

Stan agreed. They rested on three generic ideas- house, doctor, and hide-n-go-seek. Wendy too off her hat and put them inside and chose one.

"We're playing doctor!" she announced.

The two ended up playing a combination of both doctor and house. Wendy would be playing both the doctor and mother while Stan was playing the son and pretended Rocky was his little brother. Wendy was also playing with a stuffed cat of hers who would be Stan's little sister. Wendy lined up her three pretend children in a line before putting her hands on her hips.

"Okay Stan, Rocky, and Ariel, you're all going to the doctor today," she said in a firm manner.

"Aw-awww!" Stan whined. "Do we have to Mom?" he picked up his raccoon. "Yeah, do we have to Mommy?"

"I'm gonna stay home!" Wendy made Ariel the cat say.

"I'm running away!" Rocky said.

Wendy laughed. Stan felt his face heat up again at her giggle.

"Yes you have to Rocky. If you don't go then, um…" Wendy thought.

"No dessert!" Stan suggested.

"Yeah! No dessert!" Wendy said.

"Can I still have dessert if I don't go?" Stan raised a hand.

"No you may not young man," Wendy said, hands on hips again. "Now everyone in the car so we can go!"

The two had a fun time for twenty minutes after this. Stan went around the house running from Wendy as she tried to place both him and Rocky in a make-shift car. It was fun to pretend to do something he wish he could in real life. He wished he could simply run off from his own mother whenever she tried to take him to a doctor's appointment. Wendy finally succeeded and dragged a lank Stan by the arm into the fake car.

"For making Mommy chase you, you don't get any dessert now Stan!" she told him.

"Awww! Not fair! Not fair!" Stan threw a fake tantrum making Wendy laugh some more.

When they finally reached the doctor's office (Wendy's bedroom) they had more fun. When Wendy went to play the part of Dr. Flower (she was dressed in some child-sized scrubs from a play-set of hers) Stan ran off again from her. Again she dragged him back to her room and forced him on her bed. Stan was surprised at how strong she was as she pulled him around.

"Which one of you am I going to check first?" Wendy asked.

"Not me, I'm not sick!" Stan had Rocky say.

"Me either!" Wendy made Ariel nod.

"I'm the least un-sickest!" Stan had his raccoon argue.

"No, I am! I'm always healthy!" Wendy had her cat call back.

"I'm oldest so I'm the least un-sickest of all of you!" Stan raised his hand.

Wendy caught it. "You raised your hand first Stan so you're going first!"

"Awww!"

"Now stay still while Dr. Flower looks you over!"

Stan laughed as she checked him over with her toy medical kit. The tools tickled and he was already a very ticklish boy.

"See? It's not so bad, it tickles," Wendy smiled.

"Stop touching my neck!" Stan squirmed.

"You're making Mommy very happy Stan," Wendy told her 'son.'

"Mommy, the doctor is tickling me!" Stan smiled.

Wendy stood up. "Okay Mister, the last thing I have to do is take blood!"

"No! I hate that!" Stan faked a tantrum again.

Wendy straightened him up. "C'mon Stan really, you're tiring me out."

"I'm not having my blood drawn!" Stan said again.

"It's not Dr. Flower talking, it's me, Wendy," Wendy said.

"Huh?"

"You boys move too much."

"Oh, sorry."

Wendy grabbed a pencil off the ground. "I'm going to take your blood now so you be a good boy for me Stan."

She jabbed the end of the pencil in the crook of his arm.

"Ow!" he cried. He backed away. "You're not supposed to do it for reals!"

Wendy gasped. "Oh no, I hurt you?"

Stan's eyes were watering; he nodded. Wendy looked over at his arm and saw a red dot there, at the touch it began to bleed.

"Ohh, I'm so sorry Stan! I didn't mean to stab you!"

"The pencil was already sharp! It was just sappose to be for fake!"

Wendy trembled, she was afraid her mother would find out and she would be in trouble.

Stan was sniffing loudly now, trying to not let his tears fall.

"I don't know what to do. If I tell my mom I'll be in trouble," Wendy told him.

Stan stood. "Well you have to, it hurts."

Wendy looked down. Stan frowned.

"Maybe… maybe I can just tell her what happened. And lie about it."

The little girl looked up. "You'd lie? For me?"

"Well…" Stan moved his foot around bashfully.

"Okay, let's go!"

Stan told Mrs. Testaburger he had accident stabbed himself with a pencil he was using for an art project upstairs. She put a band-aid over the dot while glancing at her daughter. Wendy decided not to meet her mother in the eyes. After the stabbing incident the two kids went back upstairs to continue to play doctor. This time they decided not to use real pencils.

"How about, since all three kids are being so hard to control for the mom, they all do get sick?" Wendy suggested.

"Why?"

"That way, we can play longer. They can go home and cause more problems for the mom while she tries to take care of them."

Stan thought. "Okay."

Those three hours sailed away. Stan never thought time could pass so quickly. Then again he didn't really know what three hours meant. Sharon picked him up and was delighted to see a smile on his face.

"Oh the kids had such a fun time!" Mrs. Testaburger said gleefully.

"Did they really?" Sharon looked at her son, surprised.

"I'm not sure about everything they did but they had a great time. Wendy showed Stanley her rabbit. He was so good with him. I don't want to put a stereotype on your son but I thought boys were, well… rough," she trailed.

"Oh not Stan, he's a very sweet and gentle boy, especially with animals," Sharon had a hand on his head.

"Thanks again Stan," Wendy said. He knew she was talking about lying for her about his injury. "I had a fun time with you today," she added smiling, and touched his shoulder. His stomach fluttered and he finally did it- he threw up all over the front step outside.

"Oooh, so close," Sharon sighed.

The Marshes droves home. Sharon looked at her son in the mirror when they were at a stoplight. "So you had a good time today did you Stan?"

He nodded. "I guess."

Sharon rolled her eyes. "What did you play?"

"We played a commination of house and doctor."

"Did you really?"

"Yeah," he nodded. "It was funner than when I play with Kyle or Cartman and everyone."

"Oh?"

"Usually, when I play house or doctor with Kyle, it's not as fun. None of us want to be the Mommy. So when Kyle and I play doctor, one of us is the doctor the other is the patient. But it's more fun with Wendy because- 'cause she's a girl and already wanted to play the Mommy. So she was both Mom and the doctor so it was differnt," Stan was explaining.

"What else did you two do?" Sharon smiled.

"That's all we did," Stan smiled. "We played house and doctor the whole time. We never even touched Candy Land. First Wendy as the mom told me, her son, and Rocky my brother and Ariel my sister that we was going to the doctor. We didn't want to so she chased us around the house, trying to put us in the car. It was really fun. Then when we was at the doctor's office I ran off again and she chased me. Then she tickled me a lot when she was giving me a checkup. Then after, we pretended all the kids were sick and was causing more problems for the mom as she tried to take care of them."

"That only sounds familiar," Sharon noted.

"Hee, yeah," Stan giggled. "Like when I watched too much TV last time I was sick and didn't want to go to bed."

"I remember," Sharon rolled her eyes.

"Yeah, I pretended that again, it was funny." He put a hand on the crook of his elbow where he was jabbed with the sharp pencil. "Hey Mom, guess what?"

"Yes honey?"

"Wendy hurt me today."

"What?" his mother gasped.

"She was pretending to draw my blood and stabbed me with a pencil. But I didn't want her to get in trouble so I lied and said it was my fault."

Sharon frowned. "You shouldn't lie Stanley."

"But she was going to be in trouble! It's a good thing I lied, that way she can still like me."

"Still… I have told you many times before to not lie." She shook her head. "Anyway, do you think you got over your little, throwing-up problem around her?"

"Well I didn't throw up at all until you picked me up Mom and she said good-bye. Now I don't know if it's going to happen again or not."

"I wish there was more that we can do about that but there isn't. You're just going to have to learn how to not vomit at every little thing that you see or feel baby."

"That's _never_ gonna happen," Stan slumped sadly in his seat, looking at his shoes.

"Well do try to hold it in. you're going to have to grow out of it some time in your life."

"Yeah, when I'm a hundret," Stan said again.

Monday came and Stan was once again heading to school nervous. He didn't want to see Wendy again and he was afraid she was going to say something about their fun play date in front of the boys and he would be laughed at. Cartman really would love another reason to tease him. He met up with his friends by Mrs. Hillgry's room that morning.

"Hey Stan. Did you do anything over the weekend?" Kyle asked, swinging his green backpack about.

"Um, no," Stan lied.

"Pff, yeah right, you went to Wendy's didn't you?" Cartman sneered.

"What? Who told you? I mean, no," Stan recovered badly.

"I went over your house to ask if you wanted to play but your mom said you were at Wendy's."

"She told you?" Stan gasped.

"Duh, I asked didn't I? So, how was it hanging with a girl? Did she give you _cooties_?" Cartman blinked his eyelids rapidly.

"No!" Stan pushed him. "We didn't do anything, it wasn't fun at all."

"Yeah right, I bet you had a blast. You looooove her!"

"Do not!"

"That's how girls get you dude! They take you in and have you play dolls with them and before you know it, you belong to them."

"We didn't play dolls okay?"

"Well what did you play?" Kyle asked.

"Nothing."

"What dude?"

"Just House and Doctor, nothing new," Stan crossed his arms. "It wasn't fun."

Kyle turned around and sighed. A group of boys from their class was coming forward. "Be careful Stan, I heard these guys want to give you a hard time."

"Hey Pukey, come back to school to puke again did you?" smirked a blond boy.

"Yeah Pukey, you better watch where you throw-up next time, I don't want to walk home wearing your breakfast," said another and the boys laughed.

"Yeah Pukey, you better be careful!"

Stan felt his face heat up.

"Don't listen to them Stan, they just want to get you upset," Kyle warned.

At that moment Wendy came forward and smiled at Stan. "Hey Stan, I had a fun time with you Saturday! I'm glad you did too!"

At that the other boys laughed again, as did Cartman.

"Aww, you had fun playing with a _girl_ did you Pukey? How cute," laughed the blond boy.

"Stan and Wendy, sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G!" they all sang.

Stan felt tears sting his eyes. Would he ever catch a break in school? He decided it was best to talk with her to get things straightened out. During class he took out a scrap of paper and wrote something down before handing it over to Wendy as their teacher wrote some simple sentences on the whiteboard. Wendy frowned at the note.

"Read it later," he whispered.

After a lesson in grammar and math it was time for their first recess. As Stan was walking out the room Wendy tapped his shoulder.

"Stan? About your note…"

"What?"

Wendy looked at it and handed it over. "I can't understand it."

On the strip of paper were the 'words': Mete me unndr the big tre drig ri(and some squiggles).

"It says 'meet me under the big tree during recess'," he told her.

"Oh."

"Well, meet me!" he hurried off.

Stan waited with baited breath under the big tree as Wendy came forward. He sighed as she stopped at his feet.

"Yes Stan?"

"Wendy… as much fun as we had Saturday, I don't think I should come over to your house no more."

"What? Why?"

"Everyone is making fun of me now. Not only 'cause I throw up but 'cause we were hanging out. I don't think we should play together ever again," Stan emphasized.

Wendy looked hurt. "But we had so much fun."

"I know but the guys can't know that. It's differnt for boys and girls. It's only my second week and already I'm being made fun of! The other boys will beat me up if they knew I played with girls. You girls don't care if you play with boys though."

"But what did I do wrong Stan?" Wendy frowned.

"Nothing. You were just born a girl," Stan shrugged.

"But I want to still play with you. I like pretending I have a son when I play doctor and house instead of a daughter all the time."

"And I like pertending I have a Mommy when I play doctor and house instead of, well, not having one," Stan trailed.

"See? We're meant to be!" she was about to hug him but he stepped back.

"Sorry Wendy but it's off. We can no longer be together," he said seriously.

Wendy sniffed. "No other boy will be as fun to play with as you Stan."

Just then Kyle, Cartman, and Kenny came forward.

"Are you don't talking or what?" Cartman said annoyed.

"Sorry," Stan said to Wendy before running over to his friends to play.

"It's over," Wendy whispered before hurrying off in the other direction crying.

Stan did feel bad that Wendy looked so sad when she took her usual seat next to him but he couldn't do anything about it now. He had to save his reputation in school as soon as possible. And it didn't stop there; he had a talk with Mrs. Hillgry before class started the next day.

"Mrs. Hillagry?"

"Yes Stanley?"

"Wendy can't sit next to me anymore."

"And why is that sweetie?"

"Um, I think she's the reason why I throw-up in class and um, I don't want to do it again. For her safety and mine, I think she should be moved," Stan said confidently.

Mrs. Hillgry rubbed her chin. "Are you sure that's why you've been throwing up dear?"

Stan nodded vigorously. "I do throw-up a lot in gen'ral but she's why I've been throwing up, lately."

"Well, if you do think so… perhaps I can move her away from you."

"Can I sit next to Kyle now?" he smiled up at his teacher.

"I don't think so Stan," Mrs. Hillgry chuckled.

Once class began Mrs. Hillgry directed Wendy to a seat in the last row.

"What? Why am I being moved?" she asked.

"I am moving a few students around, just to see if things will work better. I think it will be best if you sat next to Mark from now on."

Stan turned to his right to see his new seatmate. It was a girl with red pigtails, thick pink glasses and who was picking her nose. She turned to Stan with a hand out. "Hi, I'm Amy."

Both Stan and Cartman looked at each other and laughed. He was going to survive first grade after all.

_There you have it, Stan and Wendy. I admit, Wendy was cute and fun to write and I don't usually find little girls cute. I already have my next idea in mind so stay tuned!_

_Magical love: Rose, September 25, 2010_


	8. The Many Joys of Ditching

**THE MANY JOYS OF DITCHING**

It was mid-November, 2007. At this point everyone had gone back into the usual routine of school and work. Even Stanley Marsh, who had faced a tough first two weeks of school was finally getting used to first grade. Sure it wasn't as fun as kindergarten, sure he didn't go home earlier and sure he had to face his terrifying older sister Shelley every day, but he was finally getting into the routine of the 'big kid' part of school. Shelley had already bopped him over the head for his usage of 'big kid' several times.

"You're only in first grade turd, I'm in fifth therefore _I'm_ a part of the big kid part of school!" she had told him. Thankfully at this point he didn't have to rely on his sister for help around the school. He had his friends and liked his teacher so he wasn't afraid to ask questions anymore. Shelley was only too grateful that she no longer had to lift her little brother up to reach the drinking fountain anymore.

That morning the Marsh family was eating breakfast, ready to get into the routine of school and work once more. It was Monday and so it seemed like an eternity to salvation. Stan was particularly nervous; he didn't know how well he did on his spelling test last Friday. He had a feeling he did horrible. Sharon took her seat next to Shelley and began her bacon and eggs. Randy raised an eyebrow at his wife.

"What are you doing?" he eyed her from behind the newspaper.

"What do you mean?" she asked.

"Look- you're still in your robe. Don't you have work today Sharon?"

Sharon rolled her eyes as she seasoned her eggs. "I told you yesterday I wasn't going to work today. I have plans remember?"

"I don't remember!" Randy cried.

"I'm going to have a girls' day out today, remember now? You had one weeks ago, I think I deserve a break now and again too."

"Oh yeah."

Stan looked up from his cereal. "You aren't going to work today Mom?"

"No," Sharon smiled at him.

"Are you sick?"

"No sweetie, Mommy is just going to have a bit of fun with some friends today."

Stan frowned. "You aren't going to work but don't feel sick? I thought you said people should always go to school or work unless they're sick."

"Well, it's all right to make an exception now and again hon."

"Why?"

"Oh, it just is. Sometimes a person needs a break from school and work and missing a day helps them feel refreshed when they go in again," Sharon explained.

Stan still looked confused. His parents told him time and again to not call in sick unless he really was sick.

"Don't worry sweetie, Mommy isn't going to get in trouble. I already informed them I wasn't going to make it. Everything is fine. It's sort of like- ditching, or playing hooky," she said in his ear.

"Ditchin'? Hockey?"

Sharon winked. "It's fine to do it now and again. Nobody will get in trouble."

Stan blinked up at her. "Oh, okay." And he went back to his Corn Pops.

"So what do you have planned?" Randy asked.

"Well Linda has been bugging us all month to try out that new restaurant, The A Bar, so we're finally going to go there for lunch. Of course a bit of shopping at the mall is always on the list. A visit to the wine shop. And to the salon. Abbie told me I should get a manicure and pedicure. She's right; it's been so long since I've had either. Then, well, I'd like to do something with my hair," Sharon said as an afterthought.

"Do something? Like what?"

"I'm not sure, but I want a change," Sharon twirled a strand of her medium length brown hair over her finger.

"Well what kind of change?"

"I don't know. I only know that I've had the same hair forever, I want a fresh look."

"Well don't come out looking too weird. I married a brunette and I want to keep her that way," Randy said forcefully.

"I won't do anything too drastic," Sharon rolled her eyes. "But it is my hair so I will do what I want to it. Kids, hurry up, I have to take you to school still."

Twenty minutes later Shelley and Stan were ready to leave. Sharon dropped them off at school as usual.

"Now Stanley, you're going to have to ride the bus home today okay?" she told him before he got out of the car.

"What?" he looked fearful.

"I won't be able to pick you up today since I'll be out. You are going to be a big boy and ride the school bus today."

"I don't wanna…"

"It will be fine sweetie; before first grade even started I showed you the bus stop. Shelley, make sure he gets off with you. If I hear anything about you leaving him on the bus I swear"-

"I won't leave him Mom," Shelley rolled her eyes.

Sharon looked at her daughter questionably. "Since Dad and I won't be home you two are to go to the Heartons right after okay? Mrs. Hearton will be waiting for you so don't keep her worrying." She waved good-bye before driving off.

The morning went by pretty okay in Stan's eye. He had misspelled four words on his spelling test from last Friday but it was enough for his parents to be proud of him. He was also successful in ignoring Wendy Testaburger who he knew had an eye for him. During recess he hung around by a favorite tree with Kyle, Cartman, and Kenny. He turned to the three boys.

"Hey guys, guess what my mom is doing today?" he smiled.

"What?" Kyle asked.

"She's ditchin' and playing hockey," Stan told them.

They looked confused.

"What do you mean 'ditching'?" Kyle asked.

"And hockey? Chicks don't like sports," Cartman spat.

"That's what she told me. She's not going to work today. Instead, she's hanging with her friends."

"Hey, that's pretty cool," Kyle noted.

"Yeah. She said nobody is going to be mad at her for not going to work. She'll be fine."

"But why is she doing it? Why can't your mom have fun with her friends on the weekend?" Kyle asked.

Stan shrugged. "Anyway, it got me to thinking…"

"What?" Cartman perked up. He loved when Stan came up with an idea. When it came to getting in trouble, he wasn't a wuss.

"Well, I was thinking… what if we were ditching? What if we went out to play hockey too?"

"What?" Kyle gasped.

"My mom's doing it, and she said she won't get in trouble. She said sometimes people just hafta take a break from school or work and have fun. What if we did that too?"

Cartman rubbed his chin. "That sounds like a plan."

"Yeah, it would be really cool if we didn't go to school for a day. It's November, I think we deserve a break right?" Stan looked around.

Cartman and Kenny were looking at each other, contemplating this thought. Kyle however looked unsure.

"But Stan, it _is_ only November. School just started."

"Well… well my mom has only been back to work the same time as us," Stan frowned. "When we all went to California for the summer, she- she started work not so long before we started school. My mom was in work only two weeks before we started first grade. It's not that big of a thing."

"Do we skip the whole day or just half?" it sounded as if Kyle wanted to skip half.

"The whole day _duh_! My mom has plans for all of today," Stan exasperated.

There was a broad smile on Cartman's face. "This is perfect! Let's do it!"

"Yeah!" Kenny chimed in.

Kyle still looked hesitant.

"Think of it Kyle, we would be able to skip school and do something fun the whole day! It's almost like being sick and not going to school. But instead of bein' in bed all day feeling like crap, we'll be outside having fun!" Stan said happily, almost hopping with joy.

"But… I like school."

Cartman rolled his eyes. "What a Jew."

"Shut-up fatass!" Kyle bit back.

"Guys, c'mon, now let's think. When should we do it?" Stan said across them.

"Tomorrow?" Cartman suggested.

"Naw, we won't have enough time thinking of stuff to do."

"Then when wuss?"

Stan glared. "Next week? That way we can think of something fun for days."

"_When_ next week?" Cartman groaned.

"Monday. They're always the worst," Stan noted.

"Fine."

"So we all agree to go ditching and play hockey Monday?" Stan looked around at his three friends.

"Do we _have_ to play hockey?" Cartman asked.

"Well my mom is."

"So? Let's play something else. I think the baseball field at the park will be free since everyone will be at school," Cartman told them.

"Okay, we can use that instead. Who's up for Monday?" Stan put his hand out. Cartman and Kenny placed theirs on top instantly.

Kyle bit his lip for a moment before finally joining in. Stan looked around again.

"Okay, but we can't tell anyone what we're doing. It seemed like my dad had no idea my mom was doing it so I think we shouldn't tell our parents. We need to come up with a plan to make everyone believe we shouldn't go to school."

At 5:00 Stan and Shelley returned home from their neighbors' house after Randy picked them up. Not long after Sharon arrived-looking very different indeed.

"Sh- Sharon," Randy gasped.

"You like?" Sharon smiled as she placed a hand over her now very short hair.

"I- I"- Randy spluttered.

"You look pretty Mommy!" Stan ran to her for a kiss.

"Thank-you sweetie." After she greeted her son she looked back at her husband. "Well? What do you think Randy?"

Randy looked at her and touched her hair that now hung just over her neck. "Well… it is different."

"I know. I didn't have a clear idea as to what I wanted to do once we got to the salon but Abbie suggested I get a good trim. I'm so happy I listened; it was something I've wanted to do for a few years now. I was sick of my boring 'Mommy hair-do.'"

"But I liked you with long hair," Randy stated.

"I'm sorry dear but this was something I really wanted to do. It's my hair," Sharon raised a brow.

"But… you look so different."

"The girls said it really brought out my face, and my eyes. What do you think kids?"

"I like it Mom!" Stan said again jumping.

"Yeah, me too," Shelley agreed.

"Well that's three against one Randy. I'm going to get dinner started." Sharon winked and went into the kitchen.

It was apparent that during dinner, ditching would be the best thing to do in Stan's young mind. His mother sure seemed happy she had done so and had a very fun day indeed. He couldn't wait to come home with such stories as well.

As the days passed the boys drew up a plan of action on how they would ditch and what activities they would take part in that day. Stan had done extra chores around the house and helped his mom make dinner all that week giving him an extra two dollars on his allowance which he stored in his little Mickey bag to be spent with his other allowance money next Monday. Cartman had stolen some money from his mom's purse to spend so everything was normal there. By Friday they had come up with how they would not go to school. Since Stan was good at crying and acting upset on command, he would stay home and pretend he was feeling sick. When it was 9:00, he would sneak out his bedroom window and meet with his friends. Since Cartman was also good at acting, he would be doing the same thing. Kyle would convince his mother to ride the bus to school and instead of walking to the bus stop, meet with everyone at the baseball field. Kenny's parents obviously didn't care much for their son so he'd walk out of the house and meet with everyone, no problem. The plan was set, and all they had to do was put it in play.

Monday morning. A knock on the door from his dad awoke Stan from his slumber. He sat up in bed for a few minutes thinking of how best to fake illness. He decided to wait until one of his parents went up to try and wake up again. He didn't have to wait long, his door opened and Randy stepped in.

"Stanley, wake up, time for breakfast."

Stan was lying on his side, blankets pulled around him tight. "Daddy, I don't feel good."

"What?"

"I don't feel good."

Stan sniffed as his father walked over to him and placed a hand on his forehead. "You don't feel warm son."

"I still don't feel good…"

"Well… well okay. Wait just a sec; let me get your mother."

Randy came upstairs a minute later with Sharon. She felt her son's forehead before kneeling by his side.

"You don't feel good honey?"

"No. I feel bad. Really bad," Stan answered.

"Okay. What's hurting you?"

"My tummy. It's really hurting. Oowww!" Stan moaned and curled in a fetal position.

"Do you need to throw-up Stanley?" Sharon asked.

"If he did he would have. Throwing up is like blinking for him," Randy stated.

Sharon glared. For extra measure, Stan thought it best to vomit. He knew he could do it if he tried. He closed his eyes and groaned, thinking of how he felt on the Spinning Tea Cup ride at Disneyland over the summer. The constant spinning, never slowing down. He thought and thought and before he knew it- leaned over his bed and threw-up. It worked- his parents were in a panic state and he spent a good ten minutes in the bathroom over the toilet. When his mother was out of eyesight for a few minutes he took a cloth, dampened it and dabbed at his face to appear sicklier. Sharon carried him back to bed after.

"Well, you tell me if he gets worse," Randy informed Sharon as he was about to head to work.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, you're staying home today to watch him right?"

"What? I have to go to work today; I can't miss two days in a row if I was never sick!" Sharon stated.

"Well I can't stay; I'm going to be busy all day!"

"I'll be even busier since I didn't come in yesterday!"

"I am not staying home today _Shar_on!" Randy put his foot down.

"Well I can't either!" she argued.

"You've taken him to work before," Randy reminded her.

"And so have you!" she pointed out.

"He says it's more fun to stay with you at work than with me."

"Stan is _sick_ Randy; he isn't going to have a lot of fun today!" Sharon snapped.

The two argued for ten minutes before reaching an agreement- their neighbor Mrs. Hearton would come over and look after Stan herself. Sharon kissed her son good-bye before finally heading out the door herself. Mrs. Hearton went into the little boy's room at 8:30.

"If you need anything pumpkin, let me know okay?" she smiled.

Stan sniffed. "I'm act'ally pretty tired. Could you shut the door and not come up until lunch or so? I'm a very light sleeper and I don't want you waking me up to check on me."

The woman looked surprise. "Well… I suppose so. But make sure to get me if you need anything okay?"

Stan nodded and she left him. He waited ten minutes before getting dressed as quietly as possible, grabbing his allowance and hopping on his bed. The hard part would be leaving the house without being noticed for his window led to the front of the house. He used the tell-tale method of tying sheets together and securing them on his bedpost and climbing down. He landed on the snow softly and satisfied, hurried off. He met with his friends at the park minutes after nine.

"Finally," Cartman exasperated.

"Sorry. Had to make sure I wasn't going to get caught. Did your moms give you any trouble?" Stan asked.

"No," Kenny immediately said.

"Pff, no," Cartman rolled his eyes. "I hardly had to do anything for her to think I was sick. The hard part was climbing out my window."

"Since you're so fat," Kyle said.

"Shut-up Jew!"

"Kyle?" Stan looked at his best friend.

"Well, no. I- I came here okay."

"I bet he was on his way to school when he decided to have some fun instead," Cartman pointed a finger at him.

"Was not!" although Kyle's cheeks turned pink.

"Okay, now that we're here, what do you want to do?"

"Baseball!" Cartman had brought along a duffle bag where his and Stan's toy bats lay. Stan had purposely left his bat at Cartman's over the weekend so the fat boy could bring it with him no problem.

"Hey, I don't have my bat," Kyle said.

"Aww, that's too bad. Guess you're going to have to play with a stick like Kenny!" Cartman smiled as Stan grabbed his plastic red baseball bat from the bag.

"Grrr!" Kyle growled.

"C'mon! Let's play! I'm U'bado 'Himnez!" Stan exclaimed speaking of Rockies pitcher Ubaldo Jimenez.

The boys played their version of baseball with Stan and Cartman's bats and plastic balls and sticks for Kyle and Kenny for a half hour before deciding to go on the playground.

"This is so much fun now that we have it to ourselves!" Stan screamed as Kyle chased him around the equipment.

"Yeah. I am Captain Cartman and the whole playground is my ship!" Cartman announced, leaning over the edge of some bars.

"That's not fair; the whole ship can't be yours!" Kyle said angrily.

"Well that's just too bad for you _Kahl_. I'm the Captain and you all have to do as I say!" Cartman pointed a finger at the three boys.

"Yeah, that's stupid Cartman," Stan said.

"Nuh-uh."

"Yeah-_huh_. We want a cool job too."

Cartman sighed. "Fine. Kenny, you're my first mate. Stan, you'll be my look-out, telling me of all dangers in the water."

"Okay," Stan smiled.

"Kyle, you can be the stowaway."

"What?"

"You have to hide in the basement of the Cheesy Poof Express since you snuck onto my ship ill-legally," Cartman ordered.

"That's not fair; I want to be a part of the crew too!"

"Well you can't, you're the stowaway. Now if you have problems with that you can walk the plank!" Cartman pointed to a balance beam some feet away.

"Just get on the ship Kyle," Stan said as Cartman helped him up.

Growling, Kyle had no choice but to be a stowaway and hide in a slide the whole time. It was a lot of fun for three of the four boys on the makeshift ship. Kenny took orders from Captain Cartman while Stan let his imagination run wild at all the danger they encountered. Every time Kyle tried to 'escape' from his cell, he was shoved back in on Cartman's orders. Finally-

"This is _boring_!" he cried.

"You're the one who came on my ship ill'igally Kahl, not my fault," Cartman said simply, humming as he turned the wheel of the ship/playground.

"You just said I came on illegally, it's your fault!"

"C'mon you guys," Stan sighed.

"Stan, he's not making it fun for me and today was supposed to be our fun day!"

"He has a point Cartman," Stan said.

"Ay! It's Captain Cartman to you Marsh!" Cartman pointed a finger to him.

"C'mon, let's play something else."

"You guys…"

Kyle was the first one to get off.

"Ha! Now you're getting eating by sharks _Kahl_!" Cartman laughed menacingly.

"It's getting _eaten_ by sharks dumbass. And whatever," Kyle said.

"Fine! I never needed you on my ship anyway!"

"I'm getting off too," Stan said, foot from the sand.

"No! I order you to stay on my ship Marsh! You stay or- or- I'll kick you in the nuts!"

Stan's foot retracted and he looked at him. "You'll what?"

Everyone was looking at Cartman now.

"Y-yeah. I'll do it Stan, I'm not afraid," he fumbled.

"You'd really kick me… down there?" Stan covered his private area.

"He will not Stan, he always talks crap," Kyle stated.

Stan bit his lip; Kyle had a point but this was a first from Cartman. Would he really hurt him like that? Every time Shelley threatened him, she usually followed through. Sighing impatiently, Kyle took hold of his friend's arm and dragged him off. Kenny shrugged and went down a slide and met up with the other two.

"You _guys_…" Cartman moaned again.

"There's plenty ofer things to do Cartman, we have the whole day to ourselves," Stan said.

"So what should we do?" Kenny asked.

Stan suddenly gasped. "I know! We could go to the pet shop and see all the pets there!"

Cartman groaned.

"It'll be really fun. I got in trouble not long ago for not saying shit during dinner so I wasn't allowed to go to the pet store. But now I can and my mom will never know!" Stan said happily.

"We _always_ go to pet shops, let's do something different for once," Kyle rolled his eyes.

Stan was hurt that his best friend didn't want to go either. "Well then where should we go?" he asked quietly.

"Let's go to the sporting goods store!" Cartman exclaimed.

"Why?" Kenny asked.

"Dude, it is so fun. They let you try on roller skates and there's a trampoline inside you can jump on and we can throw balls around and everything. I did it with my mom not long ago and I didn't get in trouble at _all_," Cartman sneered.

"That sounds fun, let's do it!" Stan smiled.

The one pro of Cartman was that he had a good sense of direction. They may not have been able to read street signs or directions but he did know where to lead them without a fuss. Occasionally the boys looked around as adults passed them. Once or twice a grown-up stopped to look at the four little boys before they went their way. Stan knew Kyle was afraid of getting in trouble, he just hoped he didn't crack and go tell someone they were ditching. Cartman finally led the boys to Roy's Sporting Goods and they walked inside. It was pretty busy for a Monday morning so the boys went in unnoticed. Stan ran over to where the footballs were to find a really cool one. He found a squishy blue one and turned to Kyle.

"Hey, how 'bout I run down the floor and throw it to you and you throw it back?"

"Are you sure we won't get in trouble Stan?" Kyle looked around.

Stan sighed. "Don't be such a butthole Kyle, just catch the ball."

Before they did however Stan put on a helmet and ran down and threw the ball. It was actually pretty fun for Kyle and he soon didn't seem to care whether or not he'd get caught. Cartman on the other hand was swinging away with a baseball bat.

"I'm going to make it to the World Series Kenny! Watch!"

"Careful before you kill me with that thing!" Kenny snapped.

The boys ran around happily trying out the equipment before Cartman's eyes lit up.

"You guys…! Seriousleh! You guys!" he tugged at Stan's arm.

"What dude?"

"Let's go on the trampoline!"

They kids dropped the things in their hands and clambered up the trampoline that was on display, not notching the sign next to it that read: TRAMPOLINE FOR DISPLAY ONLY. NO JUMPING. (Not like they could read half those words anyway).

"I-wish I had- a 'poline!" Stan said breathless as he hopped around.

"This is so cool!" Kyle said doing the same.

The fun was short-lived however. Two employees were coming forward.

"Hey! Hey boys! You can't jump on here!" one said alarmed.

"Get off of there!" said the other angrily.

The boys slowed down.

"Hey, aren't you that one kid who made a mess of everything a week ago?" the first man pointed at Cartman.

"You told me you didn't get in trouble you idiot!" Kyle pointed an accusing finger at the fat boy.

"Well I didn't, my mom did," Cartman 'corrected' him.

"Where are you boys' parents?" asked the first man.

"Um- outside," Stan lied.

"All right you kids, get out. You aren't allowed back in here for the rest of the month! Be sure your parents know! We'll recognize you if you come back!"

"Well that blows!" Cartman whined outside the shop, kicking a small rock.

"It's your fault fatass! You lied and said we'd be able to get away with anything!" Stan said to him.

"Do you think anyone knows we've been gone this whole time?" Kyle asked nervously.

"Shut-up Kyle!" Stan said.

"I'm getting hungry," Kenny mentioned.

"Yeah, it must be lunch time. Guess we should find a place to eat." Stan looked around.

"We have to spend our allowance on something," Cartman pulled out some bills.

"C'mon, let's get some lunch. All this walkin' around is making me tired and hungry," Stan led the way.

"Where are we going?" asked Kyle.

"Okay, we're ditching, we have to make the most of today. We have to go somewhere our moms normally wouldn't take us for lunch," Stan rubbed his chin thoughtfully.

The four stood there in thought for a few seconds before all four cried out, "Ice cream!"

They made their way to South Park Creamery by 11:30. Kyle successfully was able to work the money and order enough and the boys took up seats with their treats.

"This is so cool, ice cream for lunch!" Stan giggled; face quickly becoming messy and blue with his cotton candy flavored scoop.

"Yeah dude, you're right, ditching is the best idea we ever came up with!" Cartman exclaimed in his butter pecan.

"Stan was the one who thought of it, you had no part!" Kyle pointed another finger at Cartman.

"I thought of- of- well I still had a part!" Cartman spat.

"C'mon you guys, let's just enjoy our ice cream," Stan said calmly.

After their dessert-for-lunch the boys took up rest for a half hour before deciding to go to Lolly's Candy Land for some sweets, something the boys had been looking forward to all last week.

"This is going to be so cool," Cartman was saying. "We can buy any candy we want and our moms will never know!"

"I'm going to get a whole bunch of jelly beans," Kyle was smiling.

"I'm going to fill a bag with everything!" Stan jumped.

"I'm going to fill two bags!" Cartman sneered.

"You guys promise to let me pick out something too right?" Kenny asked.

"Of course Kenny, I'll fill up a bag and we can both share it," Stan told him.

The first graders entered the brightly colored house-shaped candy shop and grabbed a bag. It was time to splurge on candy. And their mothers couldn't tell them no. As soon as they entered Cartman began to pour gummi bears and worms into his bag. Stan grabbed a pair of tongs and picked out a few sour belts. His mom never allowed him to try them yet but she wasn't here to say so! He also threw in some giant gum balls for Kenny. Thankfully the owner- Lolly himself did not seem to know or care they were in there. Perhaps he was too used to seeing kids on a daily basis to really think twice when any came in at any given time. It was defiantly the best day they had ever had and nothing could disrupt it. Nothing except-

Sharon parked the car and walked into Lolly's Candy Land with a smile on her face. She was going to pick up a treat for Stan before she drove home to see how he was doing. The poor thing was feeling sick; she knew a few pieces of candy would cheer him up. She grabbed a bag and put a few gummi sharks into it before going over to the chocolate section. That's when she thought- no, surely not. Her eyes were playing tricks on her. But no- down the aisle was indeed four very familiar little boys, the one with the red poof ball hat the most familiar of all.

"St-Stan? Stanley?" she cried.

Stan turned around from the tub of chocolate-covered gummi bears and gasped- "M-Mom?"

"_Stanley_! What on earth are you doing here? What- what are all of you doing here?" she came forward.

"Um…" his friends all shared a nervous look.

"Uh-oh," Cartman whispered.

"What are you-? How are you-? Is Mrs. Hearton-?" Sharon could not finish one sentence without another thought taking place. Why were all the boys out of school early? Where were any adults? Why wasn't her son at home? Only one thing could explain it… "You boys are not- surely you aren't…?"

Stan gave her the infamous guilty look she was only too used to seeing.

"Stanley! Are you _ditching_?"

"Um… no," he squeaked.

"Were you- _are you even sick_?" she demanded.

"Yeah!" he lied.

Sharon didn't need to hear anymore, the look on all the boys' faces, their bags of candy said it all. "I cannot believe you four! Ditching! Ditching! You're supposed to be in school! All four of you!" she cried.

"I- I got you chocolate peanuts, I know they're your favorite," Stan said innocently, holding out his bag of candy.

Sharon glared, noticed the bag in her hand before discarding it. "You boys are all in very big trouble! Very big trouble! Oh my goodness, just wait until your parents find out!"

"They all tricked me into coming with them! I just wanted to stay in school like a good boy!" Cartman whined.

Sharon grabbed hold of her son's hand tight and led them out.

"Mommy!" Stan cried.

"You are in deep trouble Stanley!"

"Mommy please!" he struggled, tears in his eyes.

Sharon made sure all the boys had thrown out their candy and made sure they were buckled into the car before driving off. To say Mrs. Broflovski and Mrs. Cartman were surprised to see their sons home so early was an understatement. (Kenny's of course didn't seem too concerned). Sharon quickly explained to them what she had found before driving home. She steered Stan into the house to find Mrs. Hearton sitting on the sofa, tissue in her hand.

"Sharon!" she jumped to her feet. "Stanley?"

"I was just coming by to check on my son who apparently was sick," she glared down at Stan who gulped.

"What is he doing with you? I thought he was sick in bed all morning! I only just went up to check on him but he wasn't in bed! I was so worried!" the woman cried.

"What were you doing out of bed?" Sharon demanded.

"I wasn't!" Stan insisted.

"When you left he told me he was really tired and to leave him alone and not check up on him since he's such a light sleeper. But I had to make sure he was okay. When I opened his door the room was empty! I noticed a huge draft inside and saw that his window was open!"

Sharon rubbed her eyes. "Thanks for everything Barbra, you can go home now. I have to speak to my son myself."

Mrs. Hearton gave Stan a guilty look before grabbing her bag and headed out.

"Just what in the world were you doing in a candy store at 1:30 in the afternoon?"

"Um…"

"You were supposed to be in bed! You told me you were sick Stanley! Sick! Yet I find you in a candy store with Kyle, Eric, and Kenny? All who should have been in school as well?"

"I- but I was sick Mom! I threw up!" Stan pointed out.

Sharon crossed her arms. "I knew I should have looked for other symptoms. Your father is right, throwing up is like blinking to you. You have only thrown up countless times before to get out of something."

"I'm sorry Mom," Stan sniffed.

"Sorry isn't going to cut it young man. You faked being ill in order to go out and have fun for the day with your friends! You are in a lot of trouble."

"I'm really sorry Mommy," Stan sniffled.

"Go upstairs to your room now Stan, I can't even look at you," Sharon had her hand over her eyes.

Wiping at his dripping nose, Stan did as he was told. He waited upstairs all afternoon, afraid of what his parents would say when Randy came home. All he wanted was a day off from school, how come his mom could do so but not him? At 4:30 he looked out his window to see his dad's car pull up. He was really scared now. He sat on his bed trembling, knowing his mother was telling his father what she witnessed earlier. He was going to get it; he was going to be grounded from everything. He might as well say goodbye to his childhood now because by the time he had privileges back, he'd be a grown-up! He heard footsteps on the stairs and his door opened. His father was looking angrily at him.

"Come downstairs right this minute Stanley!" he ordered before leaving.

"Awww!" Stan moaned but did as he was told. He caught a look of triumph in his sister's eye as he passed her in the hall. He was shaking so much from his fear he could barely hop on a chair in the dining room and face his parents' ugly faces. There was silence for a few moments before Randy spoke.

"Apparently Mom found you in a candy store with your friends this afternoon. Is that right Stanley?" he asked.

Stan looked down. "I- I dunno."

"Did I or did I not find you at Lolly's Candy Land today young man?" Sharon demanded.

Stan gulped. "Yeah…"

"What on earth were you at a candy store? You were supposed to be sick! In school! Something!" Randy said wildly.

"I- I dunno."

"Tell us this instant Stanley!"

"I dunno why I just was!" Stan's voice trembled.

"Were you ticked into it or something?" Sharon asked.

"Um… yeah. Yeah! Cartman tricked us all into going!" Stan said suddenly.

His parents knew he was lying judging by their expressions.

"Why don't you tell us the truth this time?" Sharon's arms were crossed.

Stan looked at them for a second before bending his head guilty. "It was me."

"What?"

"It was me. It was my i-idea."

"Why on earth did you think it was a good idea to ditch school Stanley?" Sharon sounded more curious than angry now.

"It's not my fault! I thought it would be a good idea!"

"What on earth made you think it was a good idea?" Randy asked.

"'Cause of Mom!" Stan told them.

They looked shocked now.

"_What_?"

"What do I have to do with what you boys did?" Sharon's eyes were wide.

"'Cause… 'cause you ditched too Mommy…" Stan made circles with his finger on the table.

"What? I never ditched when I was in school!"

"Not school. Work. You took a day off work even though you weren't sick. You lied to your boss and said you were sick, but you weren't. You went and had a fun day with your friends. It's not my fault! When you came back from your day out you looked so happy and told us all 'bout all the fun you had. I just wanted to do the same…" Stan explained honestly.

His parents were dumbfounded. Sharon raised a finger several times as if to scold her son but couldn't find the right words. Randy looked surprised.

"Mom told me she was gonna play hockey and ditch. She said it was okay, 'long as no one found out. We were going to play hockey but decided not to. We played baseball instead," Stan went on.

Randy tapped a finger to his lips. "So let me get this straight: you ditched and pretended you were sick, because Mom did so?"

Stan nodded; glad he was finally being understood.

Randy shook his head. "That doesn't make any sense. I mean, you did something because _Mom_ made you think it would be a good idea?"

"Yeah."

"Mom made you do something."

"Mom makes me do a lotta things," Stan said, honestly and innocently again.

"Mom made you do something bad though." Randy turned to his wife, a grin on his face. "Ha! Ha-hahaha!"

"What is your problem Randy?" she asked shrewdly.

"Yes! Finally! Finally! Oh I've been waiting for this day!"

"What day?"

"I can finally blame _you_ Sharon for Stan's bad behavior! _You_ were the bad influence for our son for once! You go on and on how it's my fault Stan does something stupid or dangerous but now the tables have turned on you! Oh I'm never going to live it down!" randy looked beside himself with glee.

Sharon's cheeks turned pink. "That- that isn't the problem at hand Randy! Stan ditched!"

"Yeah, because of you!"

"We have to discipline our son Randy!"

"But is it fair? I mean, it has to be hard now to look at his face, knowing the only reason he's in trouble is because you made him think it was a good idea," Randy said.

"I thought me and my friends d'served a day off too. You looked so happy and pretty when you came home Mommy. And I really love your new short hair," Stan said as sweet as any six-year-old could.

Sharon's mouth was flapping about in unspoken words still. She rubbed tired eyes.

"Go upstairs to your room Stanley so your father and I can talk."

Biting his lip, hoping he'd get away with murder this time, Stan did so. Shelley seemed to be upset her brother had not come up in tears. He just grinned at her before shutting his door. He sat on his bed like a good boy before his parents entered his room a half hour later. They took a seat on either side of him on his bed. Sharon took hold of his hand and sighed.

"Stanley, you do know why Dad and I are upset right?"

"'Cause I ditched."

"Yes. Do you know why ditching is a bad thing?"

He thought. "I dunno."

"It's because you are lying if you ditch. You lie to the school and everyone around you when you say you can't make it to class. And you know lying is wrong, right sweetie?"

"But how come you were able to do it?" Stan asked.

Sharon bit her lip. "What Mommy did was- was- wrong. I shouldn't have lied to my boss and told him I was sick. Same with you telling us that you were sick. I know what I did was a mistake. I should have waited until the weekend to have fun with my friends. Just like you should have. That's what weekends are for, to have fun. But Monday to Friday are school days and you should be in school 8:30-3:00."

Stan listened and looked up at her, not speaking.

"Do you understand now hon?" Sharon tried.

"I think so. So you're saying that it's not good to ditch because it ends up hurting everyone around you. If you ditch, you can loose someone's trust," Stan recited.

Sharon smiled. "Very well-said Stanley. Yes, the bigger the lie, the more a person won't believe you. And that's not good. I shouldn't have lied to my boss because if I did, I could get in trouble, just like you."

"Really?"

"Yes. If my boss found out I was lying to him and took the day off to have fun, I could get in big trouble with him. I could even loose my job."

"Oh no!" Stan gasped.

"So you understand now son?" Randy asked.

Stan nodded. "Yeah. I'm sorry I lied about being sick Mom and Dad. And breaking your trust…" he looked down.

Sharon's heart broke. She placed a hand on his shoulder. "Sweetie, it was my fault. I made you boys think it was a good idea to ditch but it's not. I promise I'm never going to take off a day of work again if I don't need to."

"I promise I won't ditch unless I need to too," Stan smiled.

His parents laughed.

"It's not good to ditch period Stan," Randy told him.

"Oh." He looked at his parents. "Mom, Dad… am I still in trouble?"

Sharon sighed. "No sweetie."

"Really?" he got to his feet.

"If it weren't for Mommy being an idiot you wouldn't be in this predicament in the first place," Sharon said.

"Huh?"

"You wouldn't be in trouble," Randy explained.

"Yaa!"

"Don't get used to it though," Sharon warned. "I'll know next time if you do something on purpose or not."

Stan nodded, still grinning. Knowing he did something so bad but he wasn't in trouble for it… the fact that his mom wanted to punish herself from even allowing it to happen in the first place… it was too good to be true. He just hoped his friends got off as easily… it turned out they did not, not even Cartman. Stan told his mother first thing the next day after school.

"It's not fair," he complained. "They only did it 'cause I convinced them too. They shouldn't be in trouble either."

Sharon thought. "Maybe I can talk to their mothers and have them change their mind."

Stan nervously met up with Kyle, Cartman, and Kenny the next day of school. He had to know if his mother talking to theirs did any good.

"Did my mom talk to your guys'?" he asked.

"Yeah dude. I didn't overhear but my mom told me I'm no longer grounded for a month!" Kyle ended with a smile.

"Great!" Stan cheered.

"I still am grounded the rest of the week. Even though it wasn't my entire fault, I still ditched…"

"What about you two?" Stan asked Cartman and Kenny.

"I'm off Scoff free too!" Cartman whooped. "My mom was sorry for grounding me and everything. Said it will never happen again."

"My parents don't care so I can still play with you guys too," Kenny shrugged.

Kyle sighed. "I knew ditching was a bad idea."

"Are you stupid?" Cartman said incredulously. "We had a sweet day up until we were caught!"

"Cartman's right Kyle," Stan spoke. "We were able to play and have ice cream and do anything we wanted."

"We still were caught," Kyle frowned.

"So what? It doesn't take away from the fun we had."

"It took a while to convince my parents I would never ditch again," Kyle said.

"I had to promise mine too."

"But you _guys_," Cartman whined. "What are we going to do next time we don't want to go to schooool?"

"I don't know and I don't wanna know," Kyle insisted. "I just want to go to school each day and stay there unless I'm dying."

Stan giggled. "Yeah, I'm only six and already had enough trouble in first grade to last forever. We'll think about how to avoid school next time we really don't wanna go."

"Which will be next week," Cartman noted.

"True," Stan agreed.

The boys half learned the wrongs of their day of ditching but it didn't stop them from thinking of other ways to make the school days go by faster. And they got in trouble for those things just as well. But maybe, just maybe, when they were as big as a high-schooler, they would try to get away with ditching again. At least by then they would come up with a lot better lies for their parents any way.

_Sorry it took so long for the next installment. This chapter was such an easy idea but was difficult to write. Many thanks to Raidpirate52 for the idea of the boys ditching. I have the next idea in my mind already so stay tuned!_

_Lots of love: Rose, October 30__th__, 2010_


	9. Am I Going to be Your Brother?

**AM I GOING TO BE YOUR BROTHER?**

A/N: Back finally with a new installment of the boys younger after a year. I was finally able to write this reality simple idea. For some reason it took a while to complete. This is about little Ike's journey to the world! I know Kyle didn't seem to know Ike was adopted way back in season 2 but there was no way to write this and not have him involved in what was going on. So happy readings!

It was a perfect warm spring day, 2006 and in that afternoon Sheila Broflovski, Sharon Marsh, and Liane Cartman were on the benches of East Snowy Hill Park, looking on as their children had fun on the playground. It had been warm all week and now that it was Saturday the mothers thought it would be the perfect day to take their kids to the park for a picnic and some good park fun. Kyle, Stan, his sister Shelley, Eric Cartman, and Kenny were enjoying their free day from school, as were many other kids that day. It appeared other parents had the same idea to take advantage of the sun. At that moment five-year-old Kenny went up to the mothers on the bench, as always, hood pulled over his head.

"Is it lunch time yet?" he asked.

"We just got here," Sharon spoke. "Go play for a little while longer dear. We'll tell you when it's picnic-time."

Kenny sighed and went back on the swing before some other kid stole his spot.

Sharon shook her head with a smile as she went back to her book.

"I wonder why his mother couldn't help us out today," Sheila commented.

Sharon looked up. "I'm not sure, it's been almost two years now and we still know little about his family. The boys have yet to go over to his house."

Sheila shook her head. "All that I know is he has an older brother and little sister. Poor boy, he must not be proud of his family or we would know a bit more by now."

Sharon sighed. "I try not to worry. He's a good boy and makes the least amount of mess whenever he's over. Plus our boys really seem to like hanging around him, he must have some good qualities that make up for his poor family home."

"You're a piece of shit!" four-and-a-half-year-old Stan said angrily to Cartman as he stood in front of a slide and showed no signs of budging.

"Cool! You're starting to say 'shit' now huh Stan?" Kenny smiled when he reached his friends.

Stan turned around. "Huh? Oh, yeah. I think it's my favorite word so far you taught us. And right now Cartman's being shit because he won't let me go down the slide!"

Kenny rubbed his chin. "How 'bout this?" he cleared his throat and yelled to the fat boy, "Move your fat ass you fucking piece of shit so others can go down the slide!"

Stan gasped as did Cartman; he moved aside, mouth open in shock.

"Thanks!" Stan smiled and went down.

"That… that was cool," was the only thing Cartman could say.

An hour into playtime the mothers called the kids over for lunch. While Sharon and Liane got the coolers out of the car Sheila set up an area on the grass with two large blankets. No sooner did Sharon set down her ice chest did her kids come running as if there was an emergency.

"Mom! Mom! Shelley hogged the swing the whole time!" Stan said out of breath.

"I did not! No one said I had to give my swing up for _you_," Shelley glared.

"Yeah-huh! Mommy said if I wanted to swing and you was on you had to let me on it too!"

"Kids please… let's try and have a peaceful meal with no arguing for once, please?" Sharon stressed as she sat down.

Sheila looked on as the kids began to get situated for their lunch; Sharon's kids were still fighting, Eric was threatening his mother about 'there better be potato chips or else', and Kenny was sitting quietly, although his eyes were longing for the coolers. Meanwhile Kyle was sitting like a good boy, waiting patiently for his food. Sheila smiled and reached into an ice chest.

"Here you go bubbe, ham and cheese. I made sure to place a slice of tomato on it this time," she handed over a sandwich in a baggie.

"Thanks Ma. Do you have any apple juice?"

It was a rather nice picnic, save for Shelley complaining Stan was sitting too close to her and Sharon having to place an ice chest between them to calm her down. Then Stan getting upset Shelley was allowed back on the playground before him for she finished all her lunch and he was still picking at his. Finally Stan was allowed back on after everyone else had long finished and the mothers decided to relax on the grass the remainder of their time at the park.

"How do you do it?" Sheila wondered to Sharon.

Sharon looked up. "Do what?"

"Deal with Shelley and Stanley. It's nothing but constant battling for attention with you. Not to put down your parenting…" Sheila quickly added.

Thankfully Sharon didn't look offended. "I try to see them for the different people they are and decide what battle is worth fighting over each day. They're usually worse when they're forced to be around each other. They both wanted to go to the park today but I told Shelley Stan and his friends will be here too which made _her_ annoyed all day. She hates having to look after him too. But, I keep hoping all the arguing will be worth it in the end," she finished bitterly.

Sheila shook her head. "I couldn't imagine. Thing is, I could. I still feel this emptiness inside me, the woman in me who wants another child but I don't know if 'd be able to handle it."

Sharon smiled at her friend. "I think you would Sheila, you've been trying for a while now. It will happen."

Sheila sighed, time to confess something she had been hiding for some time now. "It won't Sharon. You see, I went to see my doctor weeks ago and…"

It was very difficult for Sheila to explain what she had feared for three years now; she was unable to carry another child. She and Gerald had been trying to conceive since Kyle was three but to no avail. It weighed heavily on her heart for she always saw herself with at least two kids. As much as she loved Kyle she still felt she had room for another child. She wanted to experience those first-time mother moments all over again. She had been ready for another baby for years but to be told now there was little hope… she didn't want to give up on trying for another baby but the odds it would happen were against her. It was difficult to be at the park at times, seeing mothers with their two or three or more kids. Seeing two kids hanging on the hands of a mother's arms. Seeing an older sibling carry his or her baby brother or sister. Not only that but she knew her son would make a great big brother. She didn't want him to be lonely when play time was over with Stan; she wanted to give him a real brother or sister. She wanted a second child so much.

"Well maybe you are meant to have only one," Liane said, trying to offer advice.

"I don't know how someone can possibly know how many kids they're supposed to have. I mean, you have an only too Liane, isn't there a part of you that wants another child?" Sheila voiced.

Liane thought. "Not really. Little Eric is a handful and I'm so busy dealing with him I couldn't possibly have another. He's my perfect pumpkin and I think it would be best I didn't try for any more kids. And I'm not even married, I think it would be a bad idea to have a child with a man I didn't know again or go to a sperm bank. No, I know that Eric is all I need."

Sheila knew she had a point so she turned to her friend who had two kids.

"Would you want a third child Sharon?"

Sharon took her time answering. "I don't really know. I'd like to say yes because if I really wanted another I could. Randy and I are still plenty able to have another baby if we really wanted. But then I think of the two I have already… it might not be a good idea. I would hate to see how Shelley would react if I told her _another_ baby was on the way, and Stanley's so used to being the youngest in the family. I kind of like having him as my baby, I can't see myself having another child when he requires so much attention as it is. I know I have room in my heart for another but, Randy always tells me, one girl, one boy. Perfect American family."

By the end of the day Sheila knew her friends were talking some sense into her and were trying to help. And as she looked on the boys she couldn't help but wonder if one was enough. Eric complained when his mother told him it was time to go home, Stanley was crying to Sharon about Shelley popping the red ball he bought to the park, and the strange little boy Kenny whose family she knew nothing about. Who was to say just because she would have another baby Kyle would get along with it? Who was to say Kyle and his brother or sister would have a very strained relationship like the Marsh kids? That Kyle would be like Shelley and torment their younger sibling just because he could? Or even worse, little to no relationship at all as seemed to be the case with the McCormick kids? Would she really risk a bad relationship with her kids if she chose to have another kid in any way she could? Like any good friend Sharon was there for Sheila the whole time she worried about whether she should try for another child or not.

"You're meant to have another child Sheila," Sharon would keep saying. "You wouldn't be feeling like this if you thought one was enough."

"I know but I can't help but worry since I'm unable to get pregnant. Gerald and I decided… we'd… we'd stop trying. After what we were told I don't see the point anymore," Sheila spilled one day at the Marsh house for coffee.

"Sheila…" Sharon gasped. "Look, that isn't the only option you have. You could try surrogacy."

"No no no," Sheila shook her head. "I could never watch another woman carry my own child. Sure my pregnancy with Kyle wasn't the easiest but it's part of being a mother isn't it?"

Sharon didn't want to say yes because she herself loved the feel of being pregnant even if it was a strain. So she tried another option.

"What about adoption?"

Sheila thought for a moment. "Is that really safe though? How can you know for sure the child you're about to bring into your home isn't a carrier of a genetic disease or has behavior or emotional scarring?"

Sharon looked over her coffee cup. "Children you give birth to your own can grow up just as damaged."

And Sheila had her answer. That night she spoke with her husband in bed about the possibility of adoption.

"I don't know honey, what if the child is a carrier of a genetic disease or something?" Gerald spoke, rubbing his neck.

"Gerald, Kyle was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes when he was two and he's the only one in the family with the disease."

"Yeah but"-

"Stanley was diagnosed with asthma last year and _he's_ the only one with the disease in his family," Sheila pressed.

"Well, fine but"-

"Apparently Liane Cartman is the only person in her family who isn't overweight or obese. My point is, even those born into families with a disease may end up not being a carrier of one and there are children who are diagnosed with an illness and they are the only ones in the family who are. We can't let something like illness stop us from adopting a child. This will be a child whose parents either don't want him or can't have him. He will be placed in a home until someone finds him to be the perfect fit to their family. But who's to say the child will be adopted? Gerald, there are so many children in the world in need of a good home and we can provide one with it," Sheila almost pleaded, tears in her eyes.

Gerald was still rubbing his neck. "Well, you are right. We can't prevent something from happening but I don't want another baby placed in an orphanage if we're able to care for it ourselves."

Sheila looked at him, eyes wide.

Gerald wrapped his arms around her. "Let's try adoption honey."

"Oh Gerald!" his wife flung her arms around his neck and kissed him deeply.

By Kyle's fifth birthday the Broflovskis had everything figured out in the adoption process and decided to go with both American-based and international adoption. They wanted a second child dearly and the more options they had the better.

When Kyle got wind of what his parents were planning he was jumping for joy.

"I get to have a brother or sister! Just like everyone else! Ya!" he was even happier to tell his friends all about it.

"Wow, you really gonna get a brother or sister?" Stan asked one school day.

"Yeah, my parents have it all planned out. They said it's going to be different than normal baby stuff. I don't know what they mean by it, I just know they can't have another baby themselves," Kyle explained.

"Then how are you going to get a baby if your mommy can't carry it?" Stan asked.

"I don't know. I mean I thought moms have the baby inside them but I guess mine won't. They're gonna wait and hear from someone who doesn't want their baby and they're going take him home here."

"What?" Cartman gasped. "Your parents are going to _steal_ someone's baby? I _knew_ you Jews were insane!"

"Well that's what my parents said; they signed up to get someone's baby. I don't know the details," Kyle shrugged. But he didn't care; he was finally going to be a brother!

The first bit of bad luck arrived in August of that same year. The Broflovskis were told a young couple planned on placing their unborn child up for adoption only to be told the child had been born prematurely and the couple realized how precious the life was and decide they wanted to keep him. They had not heard anything else by the holidays and it caused for a slightly upsetting Hanukah. By this time Kyle's friends were getting annoyed.

"You told us you'd have a baby brother or sister by now," Stan said.

"Yeah, you _lied_," Cartman sneered.

"I did not! I guess no one wants to give us a baby yet…" Kyle tried to defend himself and his parents. But he didn't understand either, he knew it took nine months to make a baby and he knew how long a month was so it should be soon then his parents would have a kid. Even if his mom wasn't the one carrying it, they still should have had some news by now. He wanted a baby brother or sister; he wanted to show him or her all the cool stuff in the world. Why did they not have any news by now? Why weren't there any signs of a baby yet?

May 20th 2007. Sheila decided upon herself to go over to the Marshes to deliver the best news she had gotten in a while. Kyle was with her, ready to tell Stan the news as well. Sharon set up two coffee mugs as Sheila went right into it.

"There's a young woman who lives in Texas and is going to place her daughter up for adoption and chose Gerald and I as parents!" she spilled.

Sharon smiled and hugged the chubbier woman. "Congratulations Sheila!"

Sheila had tears in her eyes. "The woman is only nineteen and already gave birth. She tried caring for her baby but it's gotten too hard for her. She lives in a bad neighborhood and wants better for her daughter than she can provide. She- she knows she won't be able to care for her so she placed her for adoption and found that we were the best match. The girl's name is Allie and is two months old. Her profile is up on the site for the adoption center we are registered to. Let me show you, she's so beautiful…"

While Sheila was showing Sharon all the details online Kyle excitedly told Stan the news in his version.

"I'm getting a sister!" he announced.

"You are?"

"Yeah. There's this lady who doesn't want her baby anymore so she's gonna let Mom and Dad take her!"

"I don't know why a mom wouldn't want her baby anymore," Stan frowned as he clutched onto a stuffed animal of his.

"It is kinda weird. But that's what's happenin'."

Stan still looked unsure. "You keep saying you're going to have a new baby but it never happens. We've been waiting _forever_. You said it takes nine months for babies to come."

Kyle began to do some quick calculations in his head. "It's been… almost a year since Mom and Dad said they were getting a new baby. That's more than nine months."

"That's why I think you're lying. You aren't getting a new baby sister!"

"Am so! If I was lying why is my mom telling your mom the same stuff right now?"

Stan looked over to the dining room where their mothers were pouring over his mother's laptop.

"Adults lie all the time," he said simply.

"Well I'm getting a sister this time _Stan_. Just you see, she's going to come and I'm going to teach her all sorts of things and we'll be best friends. Just you see," Kyle bragged, arms crossed.

But Stan had every reason to be suspicious of his friend. Mr. and Mrs. Broflovski were set on going to Texas to meet their new daughter at the end of April only to be told the girl's birth father was granted full-custody of his daughter at the last second and once again the Broflovskis were left back where they started. Stan said smugly to his friend 'I _knew_ you was lying.' Kyle had to wonder by this point if he was indeed going to be a big brother or not.

"Mom, Dad, why don't I have a baby brother or sister yet?" he asked them one day during July.

His parents shared a look.

"Well Kyle, you see, it's not that easy to have a child," Gerald tried to put in simple terms.

"Yes. You see bubbe, a lot of complications can- can interfere with the whole process," Sheila added.

"What Mom and I are doing- adoption, is a long and difficult thing. We're relying on other parents out there to give us their child because they don't want them. But at the last moment the parents can decide they do want to care for a kid and keep them. We have to find someone who is willing to give us their child because they know they will not be able to care for him or her. Understand?" Gerald explained.

"I guess," Kyle sighed. "But the guys think I'm lying now. Stan doesn't believe me when I tell him I'm getting a brother or sister. What if he's right?"

His parents shared a look.

"This may sound wrong coming from a father but Kyle, Stan's wrong. You're going to get a brother or sister, I know it," Gerald rubbed his neck.

"Are you sure? Did I do something wrong? That's why we don't have a baby yet?"

"You did nothing wrong bubbeleh, adoption is just a long waiting game," Sheila touched his cheek.

Even if he understood what his parents said Kyle still went to bed second-guessing their words. It was a long waiting game, and sometimes during games, you lost.

As the time went by Kyle began to believe he would be getting a sibling less and less. Stan kind of had a point; what mother would want to give up her child? Maybe all the parents in the world wanted to keep their kids now, how was he to know that wasn't entirely possible? Time went by. He spent it in first grade, celebrating Stan's sixth birthday, celebrating Halloween, celebrating Thanksgiving, having to participate in a first grade Christmas song play, and being lonely and bored come December 25th as his best friend spent the day with his family celebrating Christmas where of course he wouldn't feel comfortable interrupting. Then the most amazing news came through December 27th. Kyle's mother had been on the phone with someone for a half hour now and by the sounds of it, it was something exciting.

"Yes, we'll be there! We'll be there right away!" Sheila cried before hanging up. She ran up the stairs where Gerald was and Kyle, who was downstairs at the time working on a puzzle, could hear his father's shouts down the stairs. Wondering what the heck was going on now Kyle stood up just as they came down.

"What's going on?" he asked them.

"Kyle, the most amazing news just came in," Gerald said tearfully as he had an arm around his wife as tears spilled from her own eyes.

"What?"

"We just got a phone call- there's- there's a baby who has just been put up for adoption and- and he or she can be ours!" Gerald explained.

"Really?" did he dare believe them?

"There's no information but the child is a newborn and in Canada," Sheila got out. "We have to fly there right away and adopt him or her!"

"Wow! We're going to fly to another country?" Kyle grinned.

At this his parents looked at each other.

"About that… son, I don't think it's a good idea you come. This is something Mom and Dad have to work out on our own," Gerald said.

"What? But where will I go?"

Two hours later the Broflovskis were at the Marshes' doorstep talking, Kyle already inside with his hand over the handle of his suitcase.

"I'm sorry it's such short notice," Sheila was explaining to Sharon and Randy.

"Don't worry; you two have business to take care of. And Kyle will have a fun time this week won't you?" Randy smiled at the six-year-old.

"I guess," Kyle shrugged.

Sharon was beaming. "Just think you two: when you come back you will have another child! A new baby! This is what you've been waiting for for years! It's finally going to happen!"

Sheila gave a watery smile. "Until I get to hold that baby myself it won't be real." She and Gerald said goodbye to their son, thanked the Marshes again and left.

Shelley groaned. "Great, another stupid turd I have to deal with for a whole _week_!"

Stan turned to his friend. "So you get to spend the night for seven days! That's so cool!"

Kyle had to smile; his parents were off to get a new baby and he would be spending that time with his best friend. It would be a very good week indeed. While Kyle loved that he was spending seven whole days at his best friend's house the idea faded the more he was around. It was a little weird being woken up by Stan's mom and he hated how Shelley purposely took forever in the bathroom each day when she knew he or Stan had to use it. He felt bad for asking Stan's mom to pick up some veggies for lunch since no one in the family really munched on them. He would sit on the couch with a bowl of carrot sticks and ranch dressing while Stan and the others ate left-over Christmas cookies and other baked goods. And he was Jewish. And to put it short, he felt like he didn't belong by day two. Sure it was fun they were still on their winter break and he could hang with Stan all day long but that was what made it a little dull, he had Stan to play with all day long. It was fine and fun when they went over to each other's houses after school or if they had a sleep-over but to spend a whole _week_ with someone? Tempers were soon flying.

"Why did you choose the red bowl?" Stan had cried out to him during the morning of day four.

"What're talking about?" Kyle frowned as he ate his Kix.

"The red bowl! That's my bowl! My favorite bowl and you're eating out of it!"

Kyle blinked. "Oh. Sorry dude."

"You know that's my bowl I always eat cer'el from! It has a dinosaur on it and you never liked dinosaurs!" Stan continued to protest.

"Why does it matter so much?"

"'Cause only those who like dinos can use it but you don't so you _can't_!"

Sharon had overheard the voices as she walked into the kitchen. "Stanley, remember what I talked to you about before?" she said sternly.

"He's using my bowl!"

"Stanley, we have to be respectful and polite when we have guests over. If Kyle wants to use your dinosaur bowl then he's allowed to."

"It's MY bowl!"

Sharon had to guide her son to a chair at the breakfast table and poured him cereal in another bowl as calmly as she could. Stan glared at Kyle the whole time.

"It's _my_ bowl…" Stan uttered under his breath, head in hand as he ate with the other.

"Well it's a stupid bowl anyway," Kyle finally had had it. "Dinosaurs are extinct!"

Stan gasped. "They are not!" even though he had no idea what extinct meant.

The boys argued for a couple more minutes before Stan called Kyle a 'shithead', resulting in a timeout from his mother. Kyle sighed as he sat on the couch, occasionally glancing at Stan on the time-out chair in the corner those six minutes. He wondered how things were going with his parents in Canada. Did they already meet the new baby? Would it be theirs finally or would it be just another flop? He didn't think he'd be able to stand seeing his parents so devastated again if they did come back without a child. He hadn't heard from them often as they were very busy. He hoped they would come home soon with a new baby; he didn't want to risk hating Stan any more than he already was now.

It was still winter break and on December 31st Kyle spent the night at the Marshes to celebrate the New Year for his parents were still doing their adoption thing in Canada. He was a little upset he was not there to cry 'Happy 2008!' with them but his best friend's parents made sure the night was as fun as could be. Stan's grandmother who lived forty minutes away had come over as well as a few close friends. The night was a pig-out on all sorts of appetizers and finger food; Kyle helped Stan and his mother make the homemade BBQ chicken fingers and later, made sugar cookies shaped into stars with Stan and Grandma Mara. They also played a few good games of Uno before playing a family game of Twister (Grandma Mara was the spinner). It was close to 9 o'clock now and Kyle had to look over to Mrs. Marsh, knowing she put the boys to bed at this time previous nights.

"Are we staying up or not?" he asked her.

"Well I tend to allow Stanley to stay up as long as he can for New Year's. There is no real bedtime tonight sweetie," Sharon smiled.

Kyle frowned; no bedtime? He always had to be in bed at a certain time back home no matter what the holiday. It was now ten and Stan's parents had the boys go up and change into pajamas before allowing them to come back down. By now Stan was relaxing on the couch, tapping his bare feet together lazily as he held onto a stuffed alligator. The adults were standing around talking and Shelley was on the glider in the living room watching the festivities on the TV. Kyle climbed up to Stan on the couch.

"Do you always stay up to watch the ball drop?" he asked the younger boy.

Stan looked at him and shrugged. "I only saw it twice. Last year and when I was three but I don't 'member it. My parents just told me I was in and out of sleep all that night and woke up to watch the ball before going right back to sleep. I'm hoping to see it again this year. Shelley will tease me if I can't stay awake enough to see it turn midnight…"

"Well I've never seen it- real life that is. I always have to go to bed by ten. What's the point of staying up an hour and a half if I can't even see the ball? My parents always tape it for me and I watch it the morning after."

Stan grinned. "Hopefully we get to see it together _this_ year."

Stan and Kyle filled up on cups of Martinelli's Sparkling Cider to stay awake and Stan stuffed his face with as many cookies as he could. It was now 11:55 and he was currently on his side, blanket over him, arm around Greener the Gator, eyes in slits. Kyle was in a slouched position, blanket around him too. Everyone gathered to count down and as soon as the ball dropped everyone cried 'Happy 2008!'

"We made it," Kyle yawned.

"Thank god…" Stan rubbed his eyes.

Sharon went over to give her son a hug and kiss before kissing Kyle as well.

"Happy New Year boys!"

"Happy New (_YAWN_) Year Mom…" Stan barely managed before closing his eyes. Randy and Sharon took hold of a boy and carried them upstairs and tucked them in their respective beds.

Twenty minutes later Kyle's eyes itched open; he looked around and saw the soft glow of Stan's Batman nightlight playing shadows on the walls. He sat up in his sleeping bag and saw Stan asleep on his side, breathing deeply through his mouth. There was a little whistle noise coming from him and it always annoyed him; Stan always breathed funny and made little sounds in his sleep because of his asthma. One of the reasons he couldn't wait to get back to his own room. Kyle placed his hands behind his head as he looked up at the ceiling; any day now his parents would be flying back to Colorado with his new baby brother in arms. Though they hadn't talked a whole lot over the week Kyle was told he would be getting a baby brother. That excited him. He couldn't wait to be a big brother to him! As he thought about the new baby he could hardly fall back asleep.

Kyle was given the best news over breakfast that morning- his parents would be arriving around five that evening.

"Really?" a large smile was on his face, he could care less about his Cheerios now.

"Yes, are you excited?" Sharon asked.

"Yeah. They're bringing the new baby with them too right?"

"Of course they are sweetheart; he's going to be in their arms as soon as we see them."

Kyle looked too happy to eat now.

"I don't know why you're so excited for a little brother, they're the worst things in the world," Shelley stated as they ate.

"Hey!" Stan cried.

"I get to teach him stuff and play with him and he'll have me to look up to his whole life! I think it'll be _fun_ to have a little brother," Kyle glared.

"He's going to be crying and whining and getting all of your parents' attention," Shelley elaborated.

Stan was glaring at his big sister. "They do not!"

"Yeah, I don't care about that. As long as I still get to read him stories that's all I want," Kyle answered.

Shelley rolled her eyes and muttered 'turd'. The day went by slowly. Kyle didn't want to do anything with Stan, annoying him. All he could do was count down the time as each hour passed.

"Let's play a video game or something," Stan complained.

"No way dude, my parents will be here in two more hours!"

Stan frowned. "Stop counting the time, it's stupid."

"You're only saying that because you still can't _tell_ time."

Shelley, who had been walking by at the time, chuckled.

"I can so…" Stan's brow deepened as he kicked at the carpet. He couldn't wait till his best friend was out of here now!

Ten minutes after five Kyle was sitting around in the living room when Sharon came back from the window.

"Kyle, your parents are here!"

Kyle excitedly scurried out the door as soon as she opened it and went to his father's open arms as he made his way up the Marsh driveway.

Mrs. Broflovski was smiling. "Bubbeleh, I'd like you to meet someone very special. Kyle, this is your brother Ike." She lowered the bundle of blankets in her arms and he peered over to see a tiny baby with a rather funny-looking head and a little poof of black hair on his head. Kyle smiled.

"Hi Ike, I'm your big brother Kyle."

The baby stirred but did not wake. After a few minutes of getting acquainted with his parents again Sharon welcomed the family back inside. Sheila and Gerald explained the adoption process over some coffee while Kyle sat around with the newborn in his arms.

"Told you I'd get a baby brother or sister _Stan_," Kyle sneered.

Stan stared at the baby. "I guess he's pretty cool. He's like your own baby doll. Maybe I should ask _my_ mommy for a brother or sister."

"You should! That way we both can have one!"

The Marshes hosted dinner for the Broflovskis that night and before Kyle knew it he was back home answering his parents' question of if he had a good time staying the week at the Marshe's. Kyle wasted no time explaining how annoying things got over the days. He couldn't stand Shelley and even Stan was becoming unbearable.

"He got so upset I used his cereal bowl!" he cried. "And he makes funny noises when he sleeps. And he can be so stupid at times. All he wanted to do was play while I wanted to stay on track with what we're learning in school. He got so mad at me because I failed this cat facts quiz he wrote. He would get so upset if he had to eat veggies and ate a candy bar before bed one night and was really wired that night forcing _me_ to stay up." He sighed. "I'm just glad to be here instead of there now."

That night all Kyle heard was baby Ike crying but it was okay, he found out he was only born December 3rd and was still really little and woke up every few hours. Kyle couldn't wait till he was older and show him all he wanted. He was in disbelief, after so many hit-and-misses his parents were finally able to adopt a kid and now would be able to prove to the guys he had a baby brother. He knew they'd get there one day, and now that Ike was here, Kyle could rest easy knowing he finally had the picture-perfect family.

_Ya! I am so happy I was able to finally release a new tale of the boys younger. I don't have another idea at the moment but might release a new chapter series with the boys under age 2 soon so be on the lookout for that. Hope you liked this, please tell me what you think!_

_LOL (lots of love): Rose, January 8, 2012_


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